Suicide reasoning to my disabilities - Mental Health Sup...

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Suicide reasoning to my disabilities

Babygirl20004 profile image
22 Replies

Thank you all for your responses. I was once a runway model. You would never guess that looking at me 😔. My injuries were due too an attempt of suicide. Jumped off a bridge onto s freeway below. Thank our good lord i didn't get hit by a vehicle. I broke myself pretty bad, most bones, nicked my heart with a broken rib. And brain hemorrhaging. I feel i am smarter than i ever was but very forgetful. And alot of memory is gone. Short term, and long term. I tend too repeat myself alot as some have told me. I banged my head hard on cement, for sure i did wrong too my head. I know that most will say that suicide is a cowardly way too go. I guess it is. I don't remember why i jumped that day? My mom seen me walk out the front door, then a few minutes later, heard the ambulance's and cop cars. She had this instinct that is was concerning me. She drove by too see them putting me in an ambulance. I did alot of mental damage to my loved ones. I could be in a wheelchair, or brain dead, or worse things but i'm not. It's just my weight deal i think about alot! How can i exercise?

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Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004
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22 Replies
kv3011 profile image
kv3011

I’m so sorry this has happened. I’m glad you’re in a better mindset now and that you are alive and here on this app. It’s so hard to get out and exercise during these crazy times. Just walking around the block helps! I listen to music or a podcast. Maybe every block do a lunge on each leg.. start slow, and it will get easier!💜

Wow!

Glad you are here!

My ex was wheelchair bound and did a lot of chair things obviously....

Point being he modified and did his thing! He was in shape.

You can be too! ♡ Yoga?

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to

Thank you💛

A book you might find inspiring is Anat Baniel - Neuromovement from amazon

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to

Thank you💛

Mia898 profile image
Mia898

How amazing goes to show life is worth living ? There has to be exercises you can do . All the best

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to Mia898

Thank you💛

Anonymous4321 profile image
Anonymous4321

Wow, Im quite astonished to hear that you actually HAVE jumped off that bridge.

I think i could argue against that cowards attempt suicide - i think it may take a lot of guts to do it. Not that I praise suicide or encourage anyone, but i can understand that life can be so nasty for some people that they may be tempted to try and do it - I am very sorry that you were one.

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to Anonymous4321

Thank you sweets. I did cocaine way back. Blew my university money loan on it. I wasn't an everyday addict, just on weekends. My bro whom helped me with money told me too see an addict doctor. Well, that's when my life turned up-side- down! He puts me in methadone for cocaine?? I never tried or used heroin. But still put on methadone. That changed me for the bad. I was trying too commit everyday until the day i decided too jump. Was in hosp. for 3 yrs learning too walk again. This is my reasoning too wanna walk but very hard too.

Anonymous4321 profile image
Anonymous4321 in reply to Babygirl20004

So you're saying that the addict doctor made you worse instead of better? God, what kind of help is it? You're a very strong person as for a baby girl. ;)

May I ask what happened that not only do you want to live now, but yet you've decided to fight to get your health back?

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to Anonymous4321

Lol, i am only living because my attempts of suicide never got me. I feel there is a reason why i am alive. Maybe because i live with my 76 yr old father. He is doing great, you'd never guess his age. Well, i'm here for a reason, just waiting too see why?

Anonymous4321 profile image
Anonymous4321 in reply to Babygirl20004

Ahh, so after so many fails to take your life, you've come to the conclusion that you're meant to live on - well, its a reasonable conclusion. ;)

How is your addiction to drugs? Is it gone now?

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to Anonymous4321

Yes, i guess my suicide attempt allowed me too get off methadone. My poor parents told my doctors too not put me back on it! I'm drug fee accept for my meds and weed

Anonymous4321 profile image
Anonymous4321 in reply to Babygirl20004

Thats good. Dont you ever get back to drugs - addictions are not good.

So... thank you for sharing your story with us, and keep in mind for the future that youre meant to be alive. ;)

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to Anonymous4321

Thank you for your kind responce. Coke was all my own doing. I learned frim that and stay away from narcotic drugs. It can be difficult cuz anything that makes me feel better is good too me, but stay away. I have not the money for drugs. I feel sorrt for some becoming rostitutes too feed their habbit but not me.

Ayir profile image
Ayir

Hey Im so sorry this happened to you but I must say you are one hell of a strong person who is now asking about the exercises. I think you should give yoga a chance . It will definitely help you physically as well as mentally . It does have that power. There are many youtube channels who are doing amazing jobs with yoga.

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to Ayir

Thank you very much for your response. Thank you for your 'very strong' idea. I just wanna be normal again😉

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to Ayir

Yes, i think yoga may do the trick. Because of my disability, i never got my drivers license renewed. I was in the hospital when i had too. So, i rarely ever go out. I live with my 76yr old father who is doing great! You'd never guess he is 76, maybe in his late 50's? Anyways, he drives me when i need something. I only ever had one girlfriend who has moved away. I only have male online friends now. Males are more my style in being friends with. So, i am stuck online chatting with people, i don't go out anywhere because i have no one close too me here too do things with.

Ayir profile image
Ayir in reply to Babygirl20004

Well that's great I mean whatever works for you . And you can even find some sort of support here as well.

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to Ayir

Thank you🌷

Joeb17 profile image
Joeb17

I glad you survived suicide is not a cowards way out the only reason I’m still here is that I have not got the guts to go through with it that is a good thing.we all have to be strong and get through all the bad things in life.be strong and keep safe.

Babygirl20004 profile image
Babygirl20004 in reply to Joeb17

Oh i have been told suicide is a cowardly act. Everyone has opinions? I understand u r glad i'm still alive and thanks but u never knew me. I personally wish at times i did die. And never was scared too go too hell. I didn't do a murder/suicide, just involved myself. Yes i hurt alot of feelings and feel bad for that. They are all the ones stuck with an off gal!

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