Hopeless

Hi, I'm new to the community. I dont know where to start and what to say as there's lots in my mind going on at the moment. Im single mum of two beautiful kids I love the most in the world. I've been in two abusive relationships😕 which one end it when I was pregnant with my second child 6 years ago. Since then the only thing that makes me happy is food. I tried diets, gym etc. its only get worse every year. Im fat, ugly and unhealthy 😔. Between food Im also drinking alcohol and gambling. I have to mention that my kids are looked well and never go hungry, all my bills are paid up to date. Problem is I dont want to live like this. Im on Sertraline 150mg for 5 years too. Im a loner, I dont have friends. I have small family which im not honest with, nobody really know how I feel as prob they wouldn't care less. There are a days when I wanna finish with my life but I'm scared about my kids. How they would cope with it and who would look after them. I feel like my life is hopeless and nothing good never going to happen. I failed many times with many things and I feel like my life goes down every single day. I dint know where to go or what to do anymore. I feel ugly, unhappy, lonely and hopeless 😔

[Hidden]

Well, thank u for reply. Dont know why I have the feeling u are blaming me for having better life, kind of. I wanted to be honest as much as I feel I should b. I thought I can say whatever I'm struggling with and doesn't matter what I have or don't have. I feel how I feel...ugly, depressed and hopeless. And if that will make u feel better Indieabc, Im jobless and my little son is non verbal and possible of autism, good luck 👍

[Annie_75]

hey lovely, glad you're reaching out.

Sounds like you're doing an amazing job with your kids - that can't be easy by yourself and with the issues you are facing.

I've had a long-standing battle with depression and with overeating, so I can relate. I did have an issue with alcohol too but I'm now 18 years sober.

It sounds like you could use some support so that you can look after you as well as you look after your kids.

Are you able to visit your doctor for a medication review as a first step? S/he then might be able to refer you for some therapy if you feel that would help.

Personally, I've had a lot of support from 12 step fellowships (AA, OA) and that help was there as soon as I needed it. You'll need to decide if that is something you want / need but if you do, there will be groups in your area that you'll be able to go to.

Anyway, all the best and I hope things improve.

[Hidden in reply to Annie_75]

Hello dear, thank u very much for lovely message and advice. I will think abt it what u say and glad u are over it. Thank u for lovely words. X