An open letter on how I'm feeling.

I have depression.

This isn’t the sort of sadness that sticks around for a week and then goes away. It’s not the sort of thing that even has a good reason, although there might have been one originally. It’s the sort of thing that can stick with you for months or even years, is a recognised illness, and is one of the worst possible states a human can experience.

I know this news will surprise some of you. To many people reading this letter, I’m the guy who’s always happy. I’m the guy who’s always having a good time, and getting out there and doing incredible things. However for the last few months, I haven’t been having a good time.

One of the defining symptoms of major depression is anhedonia— an inability to feel pleasure or enjoyment. You’ve probably experienced this yourself to some degree at various times; everything just seems a little more dull and plain and nothing really seems fun. With major depression, *nothing* can seem enjoyable. It can kill your motivation and your friendships, it can ruin your career, and it can cause you to give up on your megaprojects in Minecraft. It’s the anhedonia that removes one of the defining *good* features of the human condition: the ability to enjoy things.

I have a lot of dear friends who have struggled, and still struggle, with depression. Some of them have been dealing with it their entire lives. I can only say that I have a new appreciation of their situation, and renewed respect for their determination and bravery.

So why am I writing about this publicly? Why am I not I just keeping this to myself and my close friends? Firstly, it’s for my own mental health. I don’t want to hide that I’m depressed; I don’t want to pretend that I’m okay when I’m not. Pretending is *exhausting*, I’ve been doing it for too long, and right now I need all the energy I can get.

But also, I don’t want anyone to have some sort of idea in their head that mental illness only affects certain types of people. I think the more of us who come out with our experiences, the more mental illness will be accepted.

I do want to be clear that I would like to raise the acceptance of mental illness in general. I have friends with bipolar, borderline personality, schizophrenia, anxiety, and a whole slew of other conditions. And you know what? They’re doing amazing things. I’m proud to have them as my friends.

[hypercat54]

This is a really good post and it's a shame you have chosen to leave the site.

[Hidden in reply to hypercat54]

Thats a shame this member has chosen to leave this site !?

[hypercat54 in reply to Hidden]

The post name is shown as 'Hidden' which means they are no longer following the site.

[Hidden in reply to hypercat54]

That makes me sad,but maybe they will return

[hypercat54 in reply to Hidden]

Who knows? I am trying to work out who it is. Any ideas?

[Hidden in reply to hypercat54]

No clue who they r,but tomorrow is a new day

[Hidden]

Great post.I have severe depression n i thought ur post was about me,lol..but honestly its about alot of us here.Some days i can deal,others like yesterday..i have to find ways to get out of my own head.Then add a broken body,more med crap.

We may have our struggles but we r an asset to anyones life as a friend,spouse or etc.We just have to stick together n help one another n we can show others our greatness.

[MrRigatoni in reply to Hidden]

Hello how are you . Thought just ask anything can help with, I am aware of every one has bad days with mental health.

Including my self anything I can do and assist you with, any lines of support or anything you need to know am here.

I joined a while a go going through the forum a lot of members need reassurance kind words thoughts and support.

Understand every one is trying to cope and deal with this situation we all in.

Use my wealth of knowledge , expertise qualifications any thing else I bring to help those in a need.

Whether it is medication issues, diet, nutrition or wanting to know about resources services available.

I am UK based and have done a lot of volunteering around mental health charities and community forums just a ordinary gent being compassionate in a world full of pain, heartbreak and emotion.

I hope can bring positivity and lots of self esteem back on this forum, happy to be here.

I appreciate your time reading this thank you.

[Hidden in reply to MrRigatoni]

Hey Mr.Rigatoni..thanks for asking but no help needed at this time..but my docs would say otherwise,lol

[MrRigatoni]

Hello pleased to meet you thank you for sharing . Sorry what you are going through.

I have mental health myself use a lot of my time and energy to help those like yourself with guidance advice information, plus lines of support if you live in this Country .

I have just joined lots of experience knowledge and expertise on many aspects of mental health .

Always here.

Hope I can be supportive of those going through the difficulties every day.

Thank you for reading.