Upsessive suicidal thoughts *Trigger Warning*

[Imaginator997]

Currently struggling, talked to the doctor and he says it is normal what I am going through. Even though I am still struggling with thoughts of killing myself. Like today I went to school and while taking a final I thought of coming home and taking a bunch of pills, but my dad was home. I was disappointed. Just this past week over the February break, I was struggling with suicidal ideation. I was having thoughts of killing my self for no direct reason. The weak before February break I just started school after my fourth hospitalization, and I am pretty sure that is what triggered it. I started thinking about my future my career and it stressed me out, despite being told to take it one step at a time. Yet I am still excited for my birthday to get a new phone but then what happens is I still get these upsessive suicidal thoughts. Ultimately and recently I have been thinking that I can’t live life like this anymore so I might as well just act on these suicidal thoughts. After all to me death is an easier option than life. Bottom line I am getting suicidal thoughts out of nowhere, example in a crowded store I start getting suicidal thoughts. And it’s coming to a point where I just can’t take it anymore, who can live there life feeling suicidal everyday when they have no solid reason. I do have a history of depression mainly associated with school and academic pressure. Sorry if this post is a mess I am just venting but I really want to know if there others suffering from what I am going through.

[Cublings]

Hello Imaginator997, what your writing does make sense for all sufferers of depression Hun, really your not alone keep going to all self help groups research depression and anxiety, suicidal thoughts/feelings may help you understand and hopefully recognise triggers mainly coping strategies, chin up be strong think how much life you have to enjoy ahead of you stay strong please hun

[MAS_Nurse]

Hello imaginator997

Thank you for your message. I am sorry that you feel like this. As the previous message says, you are not alone, we are here to support and help. Our members have a lot of experience ,it can be so helpful to share how you feel at these times.

Keep talking with your doctor. It can also help to talk with family, friends and school counsellors.

Please can you let us know how old you are?

The Samaritans have a 24 hr helpline 116123.

Mind at mind.org have a helpline 0300 123 33

I put a Trigger Warning on your message as you express suicidal thoughts which can distress many of our members who also struggle with these issues.

Do get back to us and let us know how you are

Best wishes

[Hidden in reply to MAS_Nurse]

Thought I had answered this script.

Having problems with a new modem we installed a couple of hours ago. I have also lost all my e mails.

Can you confirm, I am in a bit of a muddle. Remember I asked about age.

Thank you

BOB

[Gambit62]

it sounds like your trigger is something stressful.

Perhaps this post will give you some ideas

healthunlocked.com/couchtob...

[Hidden]

I understand the way you are feeling as I have felt this way in the past. There is so much support available on this forum and lots of people that understand what you are going through.

I know when I was feeling this way having holidays from school and even weekends would often trigger these thoughts. What worked for me was taking up new hobbies such as exercising, singing, painting or anything that you are interested in. It may be a good idea to see another doctor one that understands the way you are feeling and can help you - I had to change doctors in order to find one that could help.

You are not alone and we are all rooting for you. Feel free to message me if you need someone to talk too.