Hello

[thescientist]

Hi, i really don't know what i'm doing here, i'm just, in a sad mood and my nickname is actually just the song that im planning to hear over and over tonight.

Today, it was a beautiful day, the sun rises and everything was so colorful outside, it was one of those days you should just go out and take a deep breathe to have a good day, but sadly, it wasn't one of those days for me. I saw it coming yesterday, i needed to study for a test and i just couldn't, my mind wasn¿t there.. i woke up today feeling very blue, and even tho i knew i needed to study more for my test tomorrow,

two days have passed and I have not studied anything. I know i just sound lazy, but i'm not, im'm not an excellent student either, but i try hard. I'm actually a very happy man most of the days, i wake up, have a nice day, i've done charity, social work in my college, and i love being in

extracurricular activities that motivate me every day.

But, since last year, i've been having these sad emotions, it's not every day, not even every week, but sometimes, it just comes.. I wake up a random morning just feeling kinda blue, not wanting to take a shower or get out of bed, sometimes it's just me being sleepy, but most times is not. Most times, i just don't want to get up and handle my life, i just feel so off, out of myself, that i can't just go to classes or do anything fun, because i'm not feeling it.

I think it all started, or may i say it blew up, when my mom went to hospital, i thought that year was going to be as amazing as my last one was, everything was on such a great track,

i started coordinating my student group (

It's a group to execute projects of different types), i was in my third semester as a guide in an accompanying program to freshmen that i loved so much, and i was entering my 5th semester (third year in college i think) and i thougth i had everything so well handled, but when she went to the hospital, and had to get a very delicate surgery, everything crumbled down, but the very bad part is, it didn't because she was there, it crumbled because, something inside me didn't wanted to visit her.

It all went downhill since then, and it has been. Somedays i'm so happy, but somedays like today are so dark in my heart, and the fact that everything got lost after that, i failed all the subjects that I was attending that semester and i got removed from to program with the freshmen, my family went crazy beacuse i totally failed and i those last weeks of May were devastating.

I came here, because i've been with several psychologists, one of them said that i was depressed, and i couldn't handle it, my mom and i dear beloved friend of mine who is a Psychologist said it was to rush to diagnose something like that, but i just panicked and change Psychologist. I really don't know what else to do, the one that i'm seeing right now, last time i was there i told him everything was ok because it was, but today i have nobody who to talk with and, i feel so lonely.

I know it is a lot to read, and i don't really know who this page works, but i just, hope somebody reads this and, just say something that will cheer me up; probably tomorrow i'll feel better, and i hope i have enough in my mind to pass that final test, but if i don't feel better, i still have to get up my bed and figure out my life, but for now, i just hope for somebody to read me and help me if they can.

Thank you so much, sharing this made me feel i little bit released,

and I offer an apology for my possible grammatical errors, I am currently living in Latin America and I have lost a bit of English practice

[20Voices]

Hi and welcome,

I know it is strange to have those days where you just feel sad and you make yourself worse because you can't find a reason for it and you feel even worse because why can't all days be good days.

I hope you felt a little better after writing this post. I find that it sometimes helps to write down how you are feeling and it is okay if you think it doesn't make sense because sometimes that is just how it is.

Sometimes we do all say that we are okay and coping when inside we are not. Sorry to hear that you had a terrible time when your Mum was in hospital and you failed your exams.

I learned from my psychologist that you have to be honest about how you feel and in being honest with your psychologist they can help you to improve and get you back on track.

Keep talking on here and asking questions. Also if you really need someone to talk to immediately then try and find a support line that you can call. In the UK we have the Samaritans and Breathing Space as well as lots of others.

I have been working my my anxiety and depression for 2 years now and I have built up a range of techniques and tasks to help me to improve each day and most importantly to help when I have those low days and even worse days.

I use meditation, relaxation, going for walks, mindfulness, vision boards, positive affirmation cards, music and i have other techniques that I can turn to if I need more help.

I started by doing a CBT program on anxiety and depression because I like to understand why I need the medication and what alternatives there are to help. I also need to understand why I felt like I had turned into Jekyll and Hyde and why i couldn't stop crying and why I couldn't cope anymore. I attended a Stress Control class as well, which gave me good ideas and techniques for healthy eating, exercise, sleeping better and lots more.

Take it a day at a time. If you are not sleeping then working out a good sleep routine and switching off all electronics in your bedroom or even better removing them completely is a very good start. Give every new technique a good 3 to 4 weeks trail because it can take time to see results.

Be honest with yourself and even more importantly be kind to yourself. I developed a mantra while working with my psychologist and it was "Don't be so hard on yourself". Jess Glynn has a song called that and I used to played that over and over and over again. I had Sticky notes all over my house with that phrase written on it as well. I keep a journal and even if I don't feel like writing in it I do write 3 things I have been grateful for that day. I have recently started using a vision board and I look at that each morning because it focuses my goals. I never got a degree when I was younger so I want to study for a degree and I want to set up a lovely home with a vegetable, fruit and herb garden. I want to be more confident and self assured and I want to help kids by volunteering. All this is shown on my vision board. I look at it each morning and say to myself that this is the future I want and I will do something each day to gain that future.

I volunteer with Barnardo's and volunteering on a regular basis is a good thing to do and not only are you helping other people but you are also helping yourself to. Just be mindful that you are not over stretching yourself by taking to much while volunteering for too many hours a week.

I hope you are feeling a bit better now and why not go back and list out all the techniques your psychologist has shown you and if you are not doing them then start them again.

You can do this you can get better and you will feel happy again. Also if anyone tells you that they are super happy every day and that you should be as well. I'd be worried because we all have ups and downs, that is part of life. It is taking control and knowing that if today is a bad day that tomorrow will be better and looking forward to what tomorrow will bring and the challenges that there will be is what should keep you going.

Also we are all unique individuals and we all have our own talents. It just takes time for some of us to find what they are. Why not try a new hobby or find a new interest. You never know what it could lead to.

I hope this helps a little.

Take care.

[Dopeymine in reply to 20Voices]

Your post was both wise and lovely. It has helped me to change the way I see my own problems. Thank you for that, and God bless...

[lookbeyond12]

Hi, I just wanted to say that all you can do is take one day at a time. That's what I tell myself every single day when I have anxious ridden thoughts. It is a little easier to tackle your day when you're in that kind of mind set. Some days are much easier than others, sometimes you'll have good days other times you'll have bad days. You just have to learn to cope with the emotions you are feeling. Sometimes I'll listen to music or go workout those are some of my coping mechanisms to just get out of my head for a little while. I hope this helps...

[NFDK]

Hello there and pleased to meet you. I can't write much now, as I am really tired, but I just wanted to say to you that I am so sorry that things seems so bleak to you at times. I have struggled in some of the same ways since my Mum died back in 2013. She was my world x