I'm NEW here... cautious, yet hopeful.

[MarkJames]

Depression has been extremely difficult, especially lately, and I don't know why. I find myself isolating more and more, then feeling awkward and even guilty about trying to get back to living while being absent from it for so long. Rejections just solidify the feelings of nobody really caring. It's a vicious cycle. I work overnight, sleep when it's light out, but then spend my weekend destroyed, in pain, in darkness, and inevitably in tears. I do a good job of disguising it, the mask a mastery at this point. I guess that I'm here because what I'm doing isn't working. I guess it never did. Honestly, I'm fighting the tendency to see this as a failure. Part of me just wants to delete the entire message.

[Satsuma]

Welcome MarkJames I am glad you did not delete your post.

Here you will find many of us suffering like you. It is though, up to us, to drag ourselves out of it albeit a difficult job .. I hope you will find some coping strategies on here

[Kittykatxxxxx]

Hello there. I suffer much of what you have said. Particularly about each rejection. Sorry you are feeling so bad at the minute.

[Mia51]

Hi MarkJames

I relate to how you feel,I isolate myself from everyone.When I do try to socialise I'm always aware of rejection.Thats what depressive illness makes you feel unfortunately.Im glad you didn't delete your message because then we all don't feel alone and can confide in each other.Take care

Jasmine