I need help

[Emma-louise93]

I'm finding everything so hard to cope with.. I'm not sleeping I can't keep food down I keep having suicidal thoughts I just keep breaking down I'm trying so hard to keep on top of things I even rang the crisis team today they said they would be back in contact and they haven't I just don't know what to do or how much more I can take.. I know I need help but I feel like everytime I reach out to professionals I get shut back down I know I have bipolar but it just seems to be getting worse.. I now know when I'm about to go into a downward spiral but I haven't got a clue in how to stop myself from going there I'm just in a very dark place at the moment and I can't see a way out

[Anna0089]

Emma,

I know you said you have been let down buy professionals but please give them another go.

Everyone is different and I can't pretend to know what you are going through but I do k ow what it's like to want to give up. I've been there.

Please don't give up.. you will find a way to get through this but you need a bit of help to get there. Do you have a friend you can call or someone who can be with you right now?

Please call crises back again. Give them another chance X

[Emma-louise93 in reply to Anna0089]

I'm trying so hard to keep my head up earlier when I was on the phone to them I tried explaining I scared to sleep because I'm committing suicide in my dreams well nightmares and they seem so real and they promised they'd ring back I will give them one more chance tomorrow.. I'm not on my own tonight.. thank you for reply I wasn't expecting anyone to x

[Anna0089 in reply to Emma-louise93]

Please do babe, does the person your with know how your feeling?

If you get no help from the phone call then I would go to the docs tomorrow or even hospital and tell them Hun. Don't just leave it, even if your feeling better in the morning still go. Stay in touch x

[Emma-louise93 in reply to Anna0089]

I will rig them in the morning but I haven't got much confidence in them anymore.. If I don't then I could try my doctors but she would just try and get me sectioned and that's not what I need.. I don't think you realise how much you replying has actually done so thank you it means a lot I just wish the professionals cared as much as a complete stranger x

[Anna0089 in reply to Emma-louise93]

Sometimes all we need is a stranger to listen. Someone who has no judgment or no previous knowledge of us. The other day I was out with my little girl and I noticed that threw a pile of bricks and rubbish at the end of the road tiny little flowers had started to grow.. i know that sounds random but if small flowers can find there way threw all that dirt and rubble surly babe there is hope for people like us? X

[Emma-louise93 in reply to Anna0089]

I really do hope so x

[Anna0089 in reply to Emma-louise93]

Let me know how you get on tomorrow x

[Emma-louise93 in reply to Anna0089]

I will do thank you again x

[RENEENAY444]

OH how I can relate to your post! I am so sorry, but I have no advice. This support forum is an excellent place to be though. Knowing others experience this hell actually helps a lot. I wouldn't wish this illness on my worst enemy. It is truly awful. I hope you are feeling better soon.

[Bellisa]

dearest Emma-Louise, i am very very sorry - i have done so much to get out from my dark hollow that i don't know what did work at the end. Here a resume of how I started: 1) I trained as a Reiki practitioner and i had an atonement. 2) a couple of years later I did Reiki 2. 3) i find out about the tapping solution online and I did it to myself. 4) follow some guided meditation online, I particularly like an America guy Michael Sealey, but it has to be one that you feel comfortable. 5) i have been doing yoga for 3-4 years now. 6) I'm going to meditation with a Guru that I like, previous ones I tried were not for me. 7) I found something called Gong Bath, they are becoming more popular and perhaps you can find something near you.

I need all this things because my brain is not normal neither. With age I am better, but i do need all this type of support to calm my anxious mind.

Keep searching and practising new things. We are very lucky that there are so many alternative therapies this days. Just breath deeply and go inside you, to the beautiful you that you are.

Love and light,

xxx