Anger Depression fear

Those who know me know I try very hard to help whether emotionally (I am not a very open person in rl with emotions) or physically. Yesterday I flipped lost my temper and am involving the Police today,it all started when my fathers son by his wife (both deceased,suppose he is a brother of sorts)texted me a garbled message nothing unusual in that as he has learning difficulties and behavioural problems, I called the office of his care home and eventually spoke to a person who told me that they had calmed him down ,at the same time telling me how they had manhandled him, now to be honest I dont like the lad because of his past but had promised my Dad who passed away in November i would look after him!I Always keep my word no matter what! Two members of the care home staff had him in a headlock kicked him in his privates and banged his head off of a tarmac drive ! Their reason? Whilst they were watching tv instead of my brother he had wandered to the end of the drive which he is entitled to do within his care plan the so called carers are supposed to keep him in sight but were watching tv! The attack on him was unwarranted according to a witness as he was chatting merrily away to the witness a neighbour to his home! I am so fearfull these people will get away with this and next time my brother will be severely hurt! I am already in a dark place due to being depressed and am now more depressed because my agoraphobia i cant go to him ,but I am also afraid of what I will do if my anger keeps rising and my anger overcomes my fear of panic and i do go there I may be a disabled man in my 50s and rely on crutches but I can and have before resorted to violence in the past when my family have been hurt ! I genuinely don't want to put myself in that position because how i feel just now I wont stop, I don't have much faith in the justice system as have seen too many wrong outcomes but feel the police should at least investigate the situation! I am very angry about his treatment This may sound daft but just putting it down in black and white does make me feel a bit better ,I know this is probably stupid but how does anyone else cope? I have my proper brother and sisters (same Mother) they have not met this brother I only speak to my other Brother and one sister as I dont like the other two either but would still help them if needed so now Mum and Dad have both gone I have no one to ask advice from now.I am not over reacting as the care home staff have done this before last time he had a bruised eye and bruising on his body because they took him to mcdonalds he told the police he fell over? What should i do?

2 Replies

  • If possible, you should get a solicitor involved. If you check out the national law society or search legal aid, you may get assistance.

    Even telling the care Home that you are doing this may encourage the proper response. If they don't have restraining training then they shouldn't be trying to restrain him, and if they do, then they have abused this. Either way, what they have done is wrong.

    You can use Skype or FaceTime to talk to him. I use this to speak to my family in New Zealand.

    Best wishes


  • Thankyou Lori,I will do exactly what you have suggested,I did speak to out of hours adult care and they are also looking into it, Police don't appear to be interested unless blood was shed but are I beleive "going to have a word"? I get so angry at this kind of thing,I know its not the same but I keep Parrots which I rescued,I believe that I must care for them as well as I cared for my children,although I cant make a proper bond with my brother I feel as I promised my Father that I would look after him then thats what I have to do ,he like my Parrots can't look after himself ! I have to protect him!

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