Left my partner and want him back

I left my partner but now wonder if I was wrong. I miss my life with him, the good parts of him, and our home and pets. Everything is so very different now, and I don't know how to cope. I left thinking he would beg me back and change, give up the drink and drugs get a job, but he didn't and although I need him to do that it hasn't happened. I feel stopped in time no way forward or back. I really just don't know what to do, I've been having panic attacks and can't sleep, doctor gave me 5 diazepam to help me cope for a few days ad thinks I have ptsd but off then now and back to crying all the time. Can't seem to function much at all

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  • I'm so sorry you're feeling so much heartache right now.. did you tell him what you needed from him before you left him?

  • Hello Welcome to this site, forgive me have you been on this site before ?.

    You need to ask yourself if there would be any change regards His Attitude as I notice you have suffered PTSD, If that was part of the problem you need to go to Relate so that all problems that would be waiting for you on your return. Could be addressed

    Your Husband seems to have some problems with drugs and drink, a toxic mixture, and possibly if He is unable to work, it may be when you go back you could end up in a more unpleasant situation, You would need to go back and accept His lifestyle without any changes.

    If you could live with that and be comfortable in your own skin it may be a good idea to at least try and arrange an appointment with Relate, to sort out your immediate problems with Him and also try and get him to see the GP and see if treatment could be given to help Him give up His Drug and Drink

    I do understand you will be missing companionship, you need to consider your condition as well and look for some CBT to put your PTSD and depression into a better place so you can make rational decisions and be able to work on a more rounded life.

    B.

  • Well he sounds like a toxic person or else you would not have left him .. Break ups are most difficult .. I think if you give yourself time to adapt to your new single life you will reap the benefits

  • hi all . I'm reading posts and feeling similar but my depression is on going . I have four children I lost my first wen I was 17 due to post natal pschosis. I had two girls and the relationship was volatile my ex partner was bully a thief and because he has family he took my girls social have controlled me all my life yet I suffered abuse physically and mentally as a child I never put my own kids through what my mother put mw thru I was locked up at fourteen I was sexually abused so they sent me away at Xmas . I lost my girls Xmas . I recently had a Bab July and I'm told because of my past I am mentally ill . They took my son at two days old . I have noone except my partner but recently left him . He was verbally abusive . I seem to latch on to a man as I'm so desperate for a family I'm 29 and keep staying in bed i feel scared judged my children had everything I never abused them I was honest with services asked for help etc but it has been manipulated I think its all about money in system unless u have good trusting people in life ur exploited I suffer sleep apnea all my life . I have court next week i dont no who to turn to at all. My mom has scotzophrenia spends her life blaming me or denying her accounts she shouldnt of has me I feel like mt life was stolen robbed 😢 because I really have had no luck . I dont want to be here Xmas . I'm kind caring I lend money to so called friends but there not ere for me . I'm sitting in bed all time . If there is anyone to give me help id appreciate it but I want my babies back .. 😢

  • Dear samlou29 I wish I could be constructive and say something to help you. There are groups like the Samaritans who you could talk to if that was acceptable to you. Will your Gp work with you? I am so sorry that my answers are minimal, I can only imagine, but would not be able to realise how painful it is for you to have such a deep, deep wanting for your little ones. I suppose that is the one thing that keeps you striving, please forgive me if I have said anything which upsets you even more. Have you even a care worker? Please be as kind to yourself as you can, I am thinking of you. Pixiewixie x

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