Self destruct mode

I am really ill atm and I absolutely hate myself, I feel alone , ugly useless can't deal with anything and do myself no favours I have nobody for me, I have to try to be strong for my daughter. that's the only thing I an still here for. I am rock bottom and can't see things getting better. I literally hurt inside. I mess my own head up and don't want to be here I can't deal with it anymore, bi-polar.

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3 Replies

  • You really cant be useless if your strong for your daughter. have you been to see the doctor? the best place we can go when we are ill is to see the doctor. that doesnt always mean that we have to end up on medication. try not to be so hard on yourself after all your doing a great thing for your daughter so you must look at that and see how positive that is. maybe you just need someone to help you see the postives in your life. maybe you do need medication to get you through this bad spell. you have made a great decision coming on this forum as there are many people who will share their own feelings with you and you will see that your not alone. sometimes we are so blinded with our unhappiness that we cant see the real picture. im sad to hear that your hurting inside. maybe you are telling yourself all the wrong things like saying your useless when your clearly not useless. your a loving father.who in the face of adversity had put his child first. to me that is a very loving and unselfish thing to do. you are stronger than you think. try telling yourself those things instead of lies about being useless. beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. some one must have saw that beauty or you would not have a daugher. the mind can try to trick us. thats why you need help to see the truth. go and see your doctor and get some kind of help i know its horrible when we have no one and have to be the strong one for our kids and feel that there is no one there for us. all that is about to change now as many people will be along to speak with you and share with you. all my love. grace sending a big hug.🤗xxx

  • Sounds like you need to contact your mental health team, but of prime concern is also your daughters welfare.

    It doesn't sound like there is an easy answer, but hopefully you can get some professional input, but will need to tread carefully if you want to continue to keep your daughter with you.

    If you have been diagnosed bipolar then I take it you are on medication and have a doctor and mental health team?

    Keep on keeping on and hang on in there.

    Best wishes

  • I am on medication, need to go back to see my psychiatrist. my daughter is fine bless her, I wouldn't tell her I am this I'll. I can't ever do anything because I love her and don't want to mess her life up I couldn't. just have to get on with it. as always . x

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