me and being new here

[Gingerlidz]

hi i am new here.

i feel like everything i am doing is always wrong. I do suffer with low moods and anxiety. i have been offered medication but i have been on them before and i felt that it made my problems worse. any advice on coping with how i feeling.

[rachelej]

I know how you feel, I feel so low, have no one to talk to, partner doesnt understand me,

having an awful time at work due to bullying

[Gingerlidz in reply to rachelej]

at least i can see you understand

[Gingerlidz in reply to rachelej]

My problem is work there is one person who is the bully. i cant go to the management due to his partner being the head. so he walks around doing bugger all but bullies me just cos he can get away with it. i cry my self to sleep. i even have started praying to let me die so i dont have to go to work.

[rachelej in reply to Gingerlidz]

totally same with me, the man who owns the company is best friends with the manager in the office, so cant even complain to him.

I just want to quit, but I need the money, im trying for new jobs so fingers crossed - awwwww try not to cry, deep down they are weak people the bullies , and dont pray to die, you are so much better than that xx

[Photogeek in reply to Gingerlidz]

Hi I'm not going to start telling you all my probs. As you are the one loookingfor help. Right now. Lol.

You will have to go to your HR Dept, forget who is married to who as it would be illegal to treat you badly because you complain. If you do t go nothing will change. Otherwise you will have to move job. It's up to you.

There are always didfficultcolleagues.in every job, the trick is to be firm and assertive and stand your ground. Unless you decide to do something g about this, then no one can help you. So take the step and never mind listening to every else's probs here. Lol, That's not what you want.

Hannah

[thurlow in reply to Gingerlidz]

I've been through this myself! The bully was the MD's sister, she made my life working there absolute hell especially when her brother or other employees weren't there. She tried to get me the sack and called me in for a meeting with her brother who was quite kind and fair. I retired a couple of years later but couldn't get over the bullying, so went to doctors and had counselling. I thought 'this isn't going to work but it did! Sometimes it helps to talk. Good luck and remember always that you are the better person!! Don't let the bad guys bring you down x

[Gingerlidz]

i know the pain of needing the money]

[Angep]

You need to get out of there as soon as you can, try get another job. I hate bullies with a passion. When you do get another job make sure you either speak to the top dog about why you're leaving and tell them that the horrible creature they live with is making everyone's life a misery. He's lazy and a bully. Sometimes I wish I had one of them things on Star Trek when they say beam me up Scottie ( that's showing my age, you prob haven't a clue what I'm on about) but basically I would transport myself to where you work and sort him out for you.instead youl have to have faith in karma!! X

[rachelej in reply to Angep]

Yes I'm goi g to do my best now to get out of ther , and when I do I will be telling some home truths ! Thankyou for support everyone . Feel better for just talking ,goi g to try and remain positive xxx

[Gingerlidz in reply to Angep]

i know scotty. me husbands a big star wars fan

[chloe40]

Hi there Gingerlidz

Welcome to our Forum here on Health Unlocked, we're very happy to have you join us.

Chloe

[Gingerlidz in reply to chloe40]

Thank you. its nice to have people to talk to x

[LoriMS61]

Hi,

Working with bullies is awful, especially when there is the potential threat of nepotism. Could you hunt for new jobs at the same time?

I took ADs back in 2008 that turned me into a zombie. I felt like I couldn't strong two sentences together and that I wasn't able to think outside of the box. I told my GP and Psychiatrist about this in February, after having a bad experience with another AD, and was told that ADs have come a long way. I agree, the one I'm on now helps me to sleep, but it hasn't reduced my capabilities. It's just evened me out.

Think about his motivation for bullying. He is a small minded individual who enjoys taking advantage of his imagined superiority. He only has power by proxy of his friendship. He is probably really insecure in his own abilities. His behaviour is a reflection on him as a person, and that doesn't say a great deal about him.

The only thing you can do, is control how you respond to him. If he thinks he hurts you and has power over you then he probably gets off on that. He has you cornered and can play with you however he wants. Do you have the option to ignore him? Is he stupid enough to put anything in writing? Do you have reliable colleagues who would stand in your corner if you took him to a tribunal?

Xxx'

[rachelej in reply to LoriMS61]

Hi

Unfortunately I would love to ignore her but I can't also she sits opposite me and when I'm on the phone to a customer she is listening to what I'm saying and then interfering trying to make me feel small, I wouldn't mind but I'm 45!!!! She's the same age as me but is lovely to the two younger ones in the office , I know that as soon as I can I'm going to do my best to get out of there , as the toxic fumes from her see seriously affecting me , thankyou so much for your reply xxxx

[Gingerlidz in reply to LoriMS61]

Yes. i am ignoring me and not giving him the time of the day. but its sometimes really hard. and the staff are aware what hes like but are all t ofaced and are to scared off him to say anything