Here i am again "/

[Shabbaa]

Hi all againnnn! Long time no type!

I've just been sitting in my bed.. Thinking to myself, I've got what I wanted.. I love my job.. I've pasted my driving test and I'm finally on the road... But yet again... No matter how many times I tell myself life is perfect.. It's getting hard again to believe myself.

I don't feel really low like I would do something stupid, but I just can't pick my stupid self up! I'm so frustrated with myself that after everything I've worked for doesn't even seem like it's enough for me?! I don't even know who to talk to anymore, I've cut myself of so much from 'friends' now I just don't know who I can talk to! Who would even care? Who would care that I feel sad and low because to some people they would think 'why are you sad when you've got everything you wanted ', I just feel so lost again! It's like.. I keep myself focuses on what I want.. And then when I'm there it's never enough! It's not even what I thought I wanted! I am proud of myself for achieving what I wanted.. But at the same time I hate myself to much! I just don't know what I'm suppose to do, I just have no one to talk to and just feel... Sad "/

Sorry for posting so late and I'm sorry for rambling but I just needed to rant to someone

[Hidden]

Congrats on having some things in your life that you have worked hard for and deserve.

That is the dream in our material world isn't it? What we are supposed to work and strive for and it's supposed to make us happy. The trouble is this is false thinking, a myth. It's people who make life worth living and happy isn't it?

There is nothing wrong in material things but they are by no means the be all and end all they are supposed to be. Now you have got some that you want you need to use the same energy and determination to find the people you need in your life. This is the hard bit.

I'm not going to bore you with how you do this but you need to be open to friendship wherever you may possibly find it. How about people at work? What interests do you have? Can you follow those? We are social creatures and need others of our kind. x

[Hidden]

Hi

Your being too hard on yourself and sitting and worrying about things isn't helping.

Well,done for getting on and having a good job etc.

You now have to distract yourself, no point sitting there and feeling bad. You need to try something to get you out and feeling better. Maybe go to the gym? I feel that maybe there is still something you want from life and maybe that's why your not hundred percent happy. Maybe it's a relationship that you want? You will have to try to get out and do something to meet people if that's the case. Instead of fox using on negative things try to focus on positive and think of one thing each day that makes you happy. Then focus on getting out and socialising, it will help.

Good luck and best wishes.

[Shabbaa in reply to Hidden]

Your reply made me feel much better I do want to go out an stuff but I don't know who I can go out with I don't really have any friends now and the ones I do have children now and have settled down and I kind of feel like I'm being left behind "/ everyone is growing up having children and making a family and I'm just on my own constantly "/ I have really been considering the gym, especially when I've been feeling I could burn of some steam but I feel to embarrassed to go to a gym alone.. I over think everything all the time "/

[Kainan in reply to Shabbaa]

Yeah except that's their life and you have your own. If you want to go out and do something, then you should go do it. You'll feel a lot better knowing that you did something rather than nothing. And just about everyone who goes to the gym goes at it alone. They are all doing their own thing and you should too.