Feeling very 'meehhh'

[Shabbaa]

Hi guys just little old me typing away again..

Can't seem to stop crying... It's so annoying! I'm literally crying over the smallest things lately.. I feel... Strange if that's the right word?

I know I should be so happy that I'm starting my new job and its gunna be a start to the life I want.. But I just can't seem to pick myself up!

I was so happy a few weeks ago.. But I really did feel so happy.. It felt like that after everything I had been through I was finally getting my rewards.. And now.. Well I just feel so low and sad I just can't take it anymore! I hate that I can't seem to just shout at myself and tell myself to stop being so sad and be happy for once! I get so frustrated with myself I then just sit and cry for hours!

I don't actually know how to be happy.. I've tried getting out the house.. Going shopping.. Got out of town the other day and just sat in chester by the water.. But I just can't seem to be happy... And I don't know what it is that I'm doing wrong "/

I know I've probably said this on all of my posts.. But this time I mean it.. And I think I'm going to drag myself to the doctors... Monday morning I want to be in that waiting room and speaking to my doctor!

The only thing is.. Where do I even begin to tell him how I'm feeling? Do I just go in and say 'I've been feeling sad lately'? I'm scared that if I tell him I hurt myself is he going to send me off to the people in white coats? I'm not sure how this works? So if anyone has any advice as to where I can start that would be very much appreciated..

I think if I get myself to the doctors on Monday.. I should hopefully feel better that I've got on the right path and then maybe I will start to feel happy again?

Sorry for the long post guys just having my little ramble of the day..

Hope everyone is feeling ok here if anyone wants a chat

[Hidden]

See your GP as soon as can be arranged.

Make a list of your worries and concerns and explain your problems from the list so you do not forget anything.

Be positive tell him you are starting a new job and need to be able to lighten your Mood. So you can begin your work in a more positive attitude. Personally they say that to take medications for depression will prevent the edge you need when doing something you are not used to, so you will need to take advice on the pathways that are open for you.

If you are so happy and looking forward to your new future you should be over the moon that you have been given the chance too start again

Good Luck

BOB

[KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME]

Hello. First of all, i can totally relate. Regardless of what's going on right or wrong...i struggle to feel 'happy' too. What is happy? I never feel content. And yes, got to the doctors. I too have been and had to admit that i had experienced suicidal thoughts and that i was a self harmer. I used to cut the bottom of my feet and my arm too at times. They did not send me to a place for crazy people if thats what you're concerned about. Walk into the room and tell them its in regards to your mood...then just work from there. The doctor will probably help you along by asking certain questions etc. Just be honest. You may feel a little lighter when you leave the room. After speaking to somebody face to face. Not judging you etc

[Hidden]

Hi I do feel for you as I know what you are going through. I think 'happy' may be aiming a bit high for now. How about 'content' and 'coping' instead?

I agree, get yourself off to the doctors asap. Have you got a friend you can take with you? How about if you write down how you are feeling and just hand it to the doctor? That might be easier than trying to talk. Hugs.

Bev x

[Hidden]

Hey good morning

Well done for the new job, you are probably feeling down because of the new job.

It's great you are going to the doctor, if he is a good one then you can tell him everything, he will probably give you some medicine to bring your mood up.

You may feel down but you are on the way up as you have made the first move, going to the doctor, that's one of your toughest decision you have ever made, well done.

Keep your head up, pick something in your life that makes you happy and when you feel down think of that thing, it will make you smile,

Keep going you will get there

Craig

[Hidden]

When we are up to the waist in water and alligators it is impossible to use a bucket to drain the swamp. That is how sometimes I look at depression

Please note no bad words, all clean. Mind I suppose the swamp water can be muddy and you could actually slip. Then possibly drown in our confusion. Remember when swimming you keep your head above the water so you can breathe. Your GP should be able to hold your chin so you will not swallow dirty water.

BOB

[Lottieonline]

Hi Shabbaa,

You've met me now!

I'm like you, for no reason I can cry for hours and hours over 'nothing'

Just cry, it really upsets my husband so I take myself off to the garage and hide away so I can cry out loud, without keeping it quiet which hurts my chest. My eyes are sore, my head hurts.

I take 375mg of Venialic XL which apparently is a massive dose and just started on Seroxat 10mg which will go up next month.

I've not heard of this tablet before, but today I have stopped crying??

Go to your doctors definitely tomorrow, there's no time like the present. You can't continue yet I did for months until he started me on this new tablet?

Take care

Lottie

[AfriendofJesus]

Hi, Shabbaa! It has been a looooong time since I last heard about you. I thought you didnt want to talk, so I tried not to interfere.

I have ready your most recent post, and I can see you havent been your best yet, but dont give up the fight. It is them which make us stronger without us realising.

I was worried about you by the way after your ' disappearance'.

Shabbaa, there is always a way out , but

[AfriendofJesus]

Hi, Shabbaa! Are you still around ? It is good to hear about you. I just wanted you to know that I wondered how you were doing.

Hope you are better since your last post.