Scared and confused

[Sueb1]

Hi everyone

I am new to this site.

I have anxiety and depression. I am 9n meds which dont seem to be working. They have been changed and increased a couple of times. It is teally frustrating and making my anxiety worse. Been off work couple of weeks. Money running out im only on sick pay. Which is making my anxiety worse again. Its a vicious circle this anxiety and depression. 8 have tried to gorce myself to go to work but i just breakdown in my car. Because i had my breakdown at work i am really nervous about going back for fear of a relapse.

Please help me im confused.

Sue

[Iluvhorses]

Hello and welcome Perhaps there is an underlying cause for your depression and anxiety. It is possible to have these emotions without knowing why they are there in the first place. It's important to find out. That way you can address the problem. Good luck!

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Hi

Thank u for replying. I did have a lot of things going on in a relationship. I think what i will do is get better and go back to my job. Only then will i know when my head is clear whether it is my job. I am much better out of last relationship. I have met someone else and already i am recovering from anxiety and depression. The only way is forward. New relationship and new job maybe. Only when you have had this awful illness do you realise life is better. when the confusion and fog clears you just realise how poorly you really were. I never thought i would say this but there is light at the end of this very dark long tunnel. Its hard to realise we will get through this when depression and anxiety hits. But believe me as long as you get the right support and understanding we can get through this. X get coucilling. Get meds and dont forget you will get back to feeling 100 percent again.

Take care everyone

Sue x

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

It's up to us whether or not depression will consume us. Some people can beat it if they choose to, but others can't like if it runs in the family. But even then it's possible to manage this condition. You're right. There is always light at the end of every tunnel, but it's our job to walk towards it and sadly not everyone does.

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Thanks mbvu

Woke up this morning really anxious. Had a goodish day yesterday. Felt like every ten seconds body jumping. Been told it is anxiety. Dint know where i am with all this. Gone backwards. Son rang with some oriblems then boss rang to ask when im going back to work. Had a panic attack. Feeling really tired and drained. Need someone to talk to but i havw had enuf now 😢

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Hi mbvu

Having a really down day today. Pressure from my boss to go back to work. My son rang hese having a few priblems. Its not like i dont want to walk to the light. Im up and down. Some mornings i feel great and ive even told my boss im ready to go back. Then next day im as low as i could go and there 8s no way i can work. Im on meds and been referred to a caseworker at a mental health place.

Sue

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

I'm sorry youre having a rough day :(. I didn't mean any judgement by saying we need to walk towards the light. You are by taking meds and going to that mental health place. Please don't ever give up and surround yourself with supportive people if you haven't already. God bless!

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Hi mbvu

I may have to give my car back. Everything seems to be escalating. I feel i have no control in whats going on.

I would not comott suicide i have my kids to think about. Ive always been strong for them and i feel im letting them dow them seeing me like this.

Sue x

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

How old are your kids? I can't relate to you, but I can relate to them as my mother is severely depressed. If they're old enough maybe you should explain your illness to them. That way they won't be totally confused about what's going on with their mother. Does this run in your bloodline?

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Hi mbvu

My kids are 18 21 and 23.

I have told my two boys and a little bit to the oldest.

I supported all three off my kids through a really nasty divorce.

I dont like to ask for help with my kids im supposed to be the strong one always in control. This situation has completely thrown me off track.

People keep saying i will get thru this but im not sure. I just curl up and sleep.

Sue

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Hi mbvu

There is clinical depression in the family yes.

Sue

X

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

Oh. I was only asking because I don't want them to be confused about your symptoms. Also if they get depressed then at least they'll know where it's coming from (your bloodline). My mother is depressed and nobody fully explained it to me. I barely even knew what depression was so when I got it I didn't know what was wrong. I thought I was going crazy. It was scary and I don't want that to happen to your children. Not that it will

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Hi mbvu

How old are you and can i call you bu your first name?

My middle son has got some issues about his father who im divorced from. Father neglected them all. Middle son has been on anti depressents to cope with issues with his dad and stressful job. He doesnt take the tablets now. He came round today and tried to tell me to go back to work but i started to dhake and get anxious. It was at work i had my panic attack round about time i got my depression three weeks ago. Think i lonk work and pain. Does that make sense.

Sue

X

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

Can you clarify "lonk?"

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Link ☺

[Iluvhorses in reply to Iluvhorses]

Oh. I'm that case, I can definitely understand. Work can surely cause stress.

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Hi mbvu

I can sort of understand why your mum was vague about her depression. Probably didnt want to worry you. It took me a while to let my kids know as i thought being depresses was a weakness. Depression can hit anybody and it takes strength and courage to get back on top again. The brain is a powerful thing and it will run your life if you let it. We are stronger than that and we will with advice and support all get through this we are stronger than we think. When your brain tells you to give up.DONT GIVE UP. KICK ITS ARSE AND SAY NO. I CONTROL YOU. YOU DONT CONTROL ME

sue

X

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

My name is Michelle and I'm 23. Sure you can call me by my first name

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Thanks

I sometimes think im going crackers with depression and anxiety. Its a terrible illness. Nice to know there are people to talk to x

Sue

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

That's what this sight is for

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

How does it affect you this depression. Are u coping with it xx

Sue

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

Yup. I take medication, see a therapist, and exercise by doing something I love. Horseback riding or at least caring for them. I'm also very involved in my Christian faith which is the one thing that gets me through my rough patches.

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Hi michelle

I am a christian too. Years ago i spoke to the vicar of our church. I was aware he did understand. It was uplifting and i felt better.

X

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

I rely on Him for everything. I've been baptized, i pray, read the Bible, and spend quality time with God everyday. He sees me through my every struggle.

[Sueb1 in reply to Iluvhorses]

Hi mbvu

I have prayed when I have needed strength.

I don't read the bible. I believe we are watched over and guided if we ask for guidance.

Sue

Xx

[Iluvhorses in reply to Sueb1]

That's fine. He's the center of my life.

[Hidden]

Hi don't forget that if you are on a very low income you might qualify for help with the rent (if you rent), and help with council tax. I don't know if there is a qualifying period but if you want to have a look (and you are in the UK), google Government site. Lots of information on there. x

[Sueb1 in reply to Hidden]

Hi

Thanks i am already getting my housing and council tax paid. Im even getting my extra bedroom tax paid by housing because i have depression as im only on full sick pay each week and nothing else. I am gonna use the financial help to make sure i take as much time off i need. I have got the pip forms just in case it takes me longer for my recovery. Im hoping i dont have to use them. Seems like you have to fight tooth and nail in this country to get any help and there still isnt any guarantees you will even if you appeal..

I dint know whether anyone saw on the news someone who had a stroke was told he was fit for work. He had half his scull operated on and half his head taken away and they still declined his claim it was disgusting. Depression and anxiety is serious as well and whilst people abuse the system there will always be people who will be knocked back fir benefit when they should rughtly get them.

Sue

Xx

[vijay1212]

Mail me at [e-mail]

[welly10]

Hi sue looked at some comments all good.you have to find out what it is that's causing this I was off work with it for 8 months but 5 of those was due to work not letting me go back.im not in that job now and anxiety has dropped I'm on 10 m cit my relationship was part of my problem but only because I did not speak to my partner about it but I was blind to the symptoms.once the fog lifts you do get a clearer idea but the big step is to learn how to control your triggers and situations.1 in 4 people fall to depression but some choose to hide it with drugs alcohol get help and keep functioning.look at going back to work phased return they have a duty of care to you so speak to them good luck.

[Sueb1 in reply to welly10]

Hi welly10

I am in a target driven job and did really well for ages got awards and everything. I did speak to my then partner who was at first sympathetic but then i think got tired of dealing with me as he had his iwn problems and just kept telling me to get iver it. I knew his responses wernt helping me so i ended the relationship. I am getting help am on meds but i feel so lonely and scared and just want all this would go away so i can get on with my life x

Sue

[welly10]

Don't know how old you are sue I'm 45 male.all that really matters right now is getting you better it might be selfish but your the one that needs the help.its little steps at first day by day.you are not alone you can come on here we all just don't get better we learn better coping mechanisms.i still get anxious I still get down but I have lots of aids to help.ie phone apps some are great.there is help .i read lots on my condition and how the brain works your imbalanced chemically right now but you will improve.if you can get out of bed do things every day make promises to yourself and stick to them.i was very dark for a while but there is light at the end.

[Sueb1 in reply to welly10]

Hi welly10

Its nice to know im not alone. This is a good site. Ive had all the tests possible thyroid blood tests heart minitor as my chest is jumping every ten seconds blood pressure all normal. Docs told me it is a mentall health issue of which i am getting help. I just am tured of feeling this way. I just want ut all to end uve had enuf. Im generally fit. Been of work three weeks walk ten miles a day in my job. This isnt me. Finished 9 year relationship and now this. Money problems due to time off which just makes situation worse. Its not like a broke leg. There is no meds that will gix this im at my witts end to know how to deal with all off this. Thank u for replying i appreciate your input. Im 54 years old.☺

Sue