confused so very much

[matrix500]

alive or dead it matters not anymore preferably dead but either way i just cant cope anymore

[ladeda]

Hi Matrix, I'm so sorry your in so much pain, please don't be alone with this but reach out and talk to your health care providers, the Samaritans and anyone who wants to listen.

I understand desperation, I have bad days that can be so difficult to get through, luckily for me I can now get past those thoughts quicker than I used to, but I know how strong I need to be to do that. A few days ago I had to revert to some tranquilizers to calm down and was so groggy in the morning, next day I purchased a pack of cigarettes, I don't smoke! But thought if I need a drug maybe that could be my drug of preference! They are still sitting there unopened, and wow I didn't realize what they cost! So maybe I also have several screws loose 😊.

I just don't know how to reach out sometimes and we do really all need that. There may be a few issues you need to address, but honestly with a little help you will be able to cope again, it's not easy maybe but achievable, yes that it is, even if you spend a lifetime on this rollercoaster, better days will come.

Lots of hugs to you, Moni xx

[hamble99b]

Hi Matrix, I am sorry you are feeling so low. Would you consider calling the samaritans? Even if you don't feel like talking, just having a another person at the end of a phone can help. Please don't be alone. Ring your gp and ask for an

appointment. If they say they only have emergency appointments, tell them it is, that you need to be seen straight away. Or go to a walk-in centre or a&e.

With the right treatment - including counselling, you will feel better than you are now. Please come back and talk to us. I will be back on later.

regards,

hamble.

[Moonmoo]

Please please hold on, please try to speak to someone, Samaritans or your GP. Do you have anyone you can talk too. I have felt like you and sometimes I do feel like this but it does pass. Please please get some help. I'm so sad you feel like this xx

[Olderal]

It certainly does matter. Firstly for yourself. An awful lot of us on this site ,have had the feeling you describe but eventually have come out of this low feeling to happy times again. No one feels low and desperate for ever, and if we gave in we would have missed all the happier times we eventually arrived at.

Secondly you are important to other people, far more than you realise in your low state. Feeling worthless , unimportant and useless is what depression does to us but it does n't mean its true. Some of the people you know might need your help in the future and its important that you are there for them when they need help. Its even likely you have n't even met some of the people that will need your help at some time ahead.

Having said all that it is important to get some help in coping . You should certainly see, (and I hope have already seen ) your GP and explain your desperation . If you can you should also find a family member or a good friend, or even post what exactly your problems are on this site.That way hopefully some one will be able to put your problems into a more realistic perspective which will help.

When depressed and desperate problems can seem insoluble to you ,but discussing them with someone else will help you find a solution. There might not be a quick fix but the problem that has no practical solution has n't been invented yet.

Olderal