Panicking--

[darkshadow]

I had glaucoma in both eyes some years ago. I was cured by laser surgery but the experience has left me with great anxiety about the health of my vision.

I also had a few floaters in my eyes but the reason for my post is that two days ago it seemed like an explosion of floaters across my right eye. It's like a veil of tiny dots plus some shaped darker patches. It's not nice but it's the fear that has come with it that I'm struggling with. I'm having adrenaline shooting through my stomach and I can't face eating a meal. My worst nightmare is back--the one I've been dreading for years. I'm terrified of going blind. This is Sunday so I can't see a doctor or my optician. If I had any diazepam, I would take them. I need them.

[Hidden]

How awful for you and I do understand how you are feeling as I have always been very short sighted and paid for laser treatment to cure it. Now my eyesight is a lot better and I don't need glasses anymore. It got me thinking and worrying about my eyes as well. You sight is so precious isn't it and I dread losing it the most.

My mother had glaucoma as well and had to use drops everyday so I and my family get free eye tests for life.

It might be nothing but why don't you ring up the out of hours doctors? I am sure with your history they could see you today, or if that fails go straight to A and E. If there is a problem they can sort it and if not then at least your mind will be put at rest. Let me know what happens please. Bev x

[darkshadow in reply to Hidden]

Good of you to to reply. There are 2 types of Glaucoma--chronic and acute. Drops are prescribed for the chronic kind but I had the acute variety. It's the one where you can suddenly go blind with little warning. I was rushed to the eye clinic in Aberdeen and had the laser treatment. Seemingly the drainage holes in my eyes were too small to let building pressure out. Two holes were punctured at the back of both eyes and it's been ok ever since. This floater problem is different. If the retina becomes detached there may be no cure. I need to have it seen to asap but this is Sunday . If I only had a diazepam to get me through today, I know I'd calm down. I'm on my own too which doesn't help. I keep crying and that's not good for the condition either. Never mind. This day will end and I can seek out my optician and doctor tomorrow. Living in Orkney means that a consultant is available only at certain times in the year. The speed with which this happened is the frightening part. I'm left wondering what next--even before tomorrow.

[Hidden in reply to darkshadow]

Hi don't you have and A and E you can get to? If this could be a detached retina then it is potentially serious. Is there a friend or family member you can call for help? x

[darkshadow in reply to Hidden]

My brother and sister-in-law are non-worriers who take everything in their stride. They don't really understand my fears.

I visited them yesterday but, as I expected, it was made light of. I suppose they think that will ease my mind but it has the opposite effect. It just makes me feel more alone.

I don't have the nerve to go to A&E as it would be thought to be a minor thing. I know they wouldn't-- couldn't give me Diazepam.

You must realise that in a community like this one, everybody knows everybody else and not much remains secret. Still---I may pay them a visit today yet. Thank you so much for listening tome.

[skcim in reply to darkshadow]

I understand how you feel, and how other people view us....family, friends, mean well most of the time but say the wrong things, i have excluded myself from a lot of my family and friends because they don't understand, making me feel more lonely and vulnerable.... catch 22 situation.

[Hidden in reply to darkshadow]

Hi a detached retina is not a minor thing if it is that. Tell your sister and bil that it could be this and ask them to go with you. How would you feel if it was serious and caused damage by tomorrow? x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Hi I found this online.

Symptoms

Although it sounds painful, there is actually no discomfort or pain associated with retinal tears and detachments. However, there are several signs that may signal a tear or detachment has occurred or is about to occur:

Floaters in your line of sight. These are specks, lines, clouds or lines that are somewhat see-through. They often move around in your line of vision. Floaters are the easiest to see when looking at a blank wall or blue sky.

Flashes of light. The flashes that people with retinal tears and detachments experience can be an arc of light, a lightning-like streak or a strobe-type flash.

Shadows in your peripheral vision. If you begin to see some kind of shadow on the edges of your line of sight, you may be experiencing retinal problems. Typically, this shadow will start off at the edges and begin to come closer towards the center of your vision as the condition progresses.

See a doctor right away if these symptoms come on suddenly, as this is usually the case with retinal tears and detachment x

[darkshadow]

I phoned NHS Scotland. As a result my son drove me to A&E. I was seen by a doctor who even phoned the consultant in Inverness. I got a few diazepam to see me through tonight and will try to get an appointment with my optician tomorrow. I'm sure he'll see me as he knows my history. They think it's just detachment of the vitreous jelly, not the retina. If so, it can be fixed by surgery under local anaesthetic here.

[trachet]

I'm so pleased for you that it is not as serious as you thought. I live alone and can empathise completely with you. In January this year I developed a pain in my eye, 5 days later I had my first lot of surgery, an injection into the eye. I have been taken anywhere up to 12 drops a day, tablets, Diamox and numerous laser surgery. In August I was admitted as an emergency patient for a an aqueous shunt implant. Ever since I have lost the sight in my right eye. I still don't know if this is permanent. I've got more laser surgery to come.

People around me are being sympathetic but no one can feel the dread that this may happen in my left eye just as quickly as my right eye. I am 50 next month but I feel much older.

I hope you have lots of support from your hospital and optician as I have found out that their communication (or lack of) is very important to keep you calm and up to date with the condition. Never feel afraid to make a fuss. I'm usually the last person to do this but I did and I am so glad I did. You know your eyes. Make other people appreciate your worries.

Best wishes

[darkshadow in reply to trachet]

Hello trachet. You are so kind to respond to my worries especially when you have obviously been through so much more than I have. Some people have the strength to go through more than others. I'm afraid I just go to pieces. My heart races, adrenaline shoots through my stomach and no doubt my blood pressure goes sky high. That increases my fear so it's a vicious circle.

You must have had many very anxious times. The fear can be overpowering.

May I ask how you are in yourself now? I'm thinking of you with love. Myra.

[trachet in reply to darkshadow]

Hello Myra, I'm feeling stronger in myself this week. The last 2 weeks I don't think a day went past without me crying about 3 times a day. I currently have a horrendous pain above my right eye. I managed to see my GP last week and she was very sympathetic. She also increased my antidepressants. I just hate the way I've been treated by my hospital and the lack of communication and rudeness of the Drs. Just waiting for treatment to tail off to complain.

If my eye doesn't feel better tomorrow I'll make an appt. at the eye clinic. As I said before listen to what your eyes/body are telling you. No one knows but you.

Keep me up to date about how things are going. xxx

[darkshadow]

Hello Tracey. I saw my optician yesterday morning. He gave me all the tests but one. It was the one where drops are put in the eye. It raises the pressure there so he was afraid to do it in case we were left with a worse situation than before. I will be seen by a consultant at the end of the month. Till then I'll just have to wait. I am calmer now because the optician said there was no blood at the back of my eye. That seemed to be important but I'm not sure why unless it means the tear is not in my retina.

I'm glad you are feeling a bit better. I hope that continues.

My former career was in education. I was an English teacher in a Grammar School for over 25 years. Funnily enough, it was my hearing not my eyesight that caused me to take early retirement. Ear infections were the cause. The nerve in my right ear was destroyed but, thankfully, I can still hear with an aid in my left ear. At one time I was afraid I was going to be deaf and blind. I'd rather be dead than that.Myra.x.