• Proud of creating below-average and mediocre products and services
• Not exhibiting, requiring or capable of serious thought
• Denies seriousness of facts
• Rejects facts (especially unpleasant ones)
• Denies responsibility
• Blames other people
• Avoids potential harm or pain by shifting attention away from themselves
• Avoids feeling a sense of guilt
• Does not change hurtful behaviors
• Denies denial (denial of denial)
"Denial of denial" involves thoughts, actions and behaviors which BOLSTER CONFIDENCE that NOTHING needs to be changed in one's personal behavior. It's a form of SELF-DELUSION.
Written by
StressBuster
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
I am not sure this is a description of high self esteem, rather one of narcissism and low self esteem. A person with high self esteem does not normally feel the need to self promote, or deny their mistakes, as they see themselves as whole people, separate from their actions. They are in touch with their feelings and have no reason to try to hide them as they feel accepted no matter what. A person with low self esteem will deny any mistake they make, or attempt to shift the blame because at their core they feel worthless and try to build a protective shield of a perfect image. They feel threatened by others, hence the need to be snooty, critical or domineering, in order to keep other people down and less of a threat.
Findingme, good points. However, I disagree with you. "Denial" is a powerful mechanism for maintaining a high self esteem and confidence. It's a failure to acknowledge an unacceptable truth or emotion or to admit it into consciousness, used as a defense mechanism.
Its my understanding that self esteem has nothing really to do with ability or looks though. Self esteem is built through being validated by those who love you and who you love and respect. A mother that gives her child unconditional love will give it high self esteem, whereas one that gives love dependent on school results or medals won on the track will produce a child who feels the need to constantly prove him / herself. A child that is loved and is used to people being nice to them, even if they make mistakes, will be happy, and exude confidence. This happy outlook will make them pleasant to be around and people will reward them even when their performance is not as good as less confident people. It is a self perpetuating circle. This does not mean that high self esteem is always a good thing. Some mothers love their kids even when they are psychotic or immoral, producing confident criminals. Some mothers encourage their children to follow paths which they are not suited for, such as acting and singing. However the outside world usually sorts this out sooner or later.
However all of this does not help you with your boss. In fact it can be so downright annoying that you might be jealous, and it can impair your performance at work.
All I can suggest is that you try not to allow yourself to react badly to this type of person, but focus on doing your best. Trying to undermine her will fail, and may rebound on you. Just wait it out, and let nature take it's course.
No SB, you have got a bit confused. These are typical signs of LOW self esteem not high. I can't put it any better than FM who has summed it up in a nutshell. Great reply FM.
You keep posting stuff like this which I find very confusing and irrelevant. Can you tell us how you are feeling at the moment and is there anything we can help you with? Are you ok? What is happening in your life and do you want to share it with us? x
Coughalot, a lot of people with high self esteem have unmerited confidence. It's not unusual. Confidence, can be a self-fulfilling prophecy as those without it may fail or not try because they lack it and those with it may succeed because they have it—rather than because of an innate ability. I'm doing alright, thanks for asking. Got in a fight with my roommate last night. He's got OCD. Needs to have the house like a spotless museum every single day. He's extremely demanding. And the new dryer has been giving us problems, the BBQ in the patio is on the fritz... It's been a tad stressful lately. I try to keep the house immaculate but it's hard for me.... It's funny, I high have expectations, but in certain things.
I agree. One of my two bosses, let's call her Janette Stevens (not her real name)—was always happy, confident and energetic. She pulled up in her BMW every morning bright eyed and bushy tailed. The reality was, she had unmerited confidence. All her subordinates disliked her, she had horrible relationship skills, she fumbled multiple changes in the department making processes more inefficient, made a multitude of poor choices, etc. But it didn't matter because she was best friends with the VP. Like a proud parent praising and admiring their child, the VP always maintained she had terrific skills and abilities...
Her terrific ability is being rescued by the VP. She doesn't learn responsibility and accountability—and hence—her high self-esteem. Her self-delusion keeps her amazingly energized!
lol i was thinking more of a very different set of terrific skills and abilities. The VP obviously did not have her around for her incredible work ethics
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
Low self-esteem
Low self esteem/stomach rumbling techniques??
Self care is key to me and my health
Depression self-assessment - should I see a medical professional?
Feeling the same way 'A break with tradition'.
