FOR ANNIE 55406 IVE HAD THE SAME PROB... - Mental Health Sup...

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FOR ANNIE 55406 IVE HAD THE SAME PROBLEM SINCE AUGUST 08-2013 LOST MY SWEET HEART.............AFTER 59 YRS 72 DAYS OF A WONDERFUL LIFE...

GenaBenedict profile image
8 Replies

WE,MET JUNE 1953 BLIND DATE, . ON OCTOBER 31 HE WAS DISCHARGED FROM THE ARMY. HE WENT BACK TO NEW ORLEANS FOR FOR 5 MONTHS ...HE CAME BACK TO ME & WE WERE MARRIED ON

MAY, 28TH 19954, HE TOO CAR OF ME LIKE A MOTHER HEN. HE WAS THE BEST HUSBAND ANY ONE COULD WISH FOR, WHEN HE PASSED, I WAS I, HAD TWO ADULT CHILDREN & THREE GRANDSONS. ONE

WAS VERY CLOSE TO HIS GRANDAD AS WELL AS TO ME HOW AM I DEALING WITH MY LOSS? THANKFULLY I HAVE A DVD.......... THAT MY GRAND NIECE PUT TOGETHER OF HIS LIFE.I WATCH IT & IT MAKES ME FEEL HE IS WITH ME ....... PRAY EACH NIGHT THAT HE WILL COME & GET ME SOON.

ANNA . TRY TO CONCENTRATE ON THINGS TO KEEP BUSY. DO YOU HAVE FAMILY? OR CHILDREN THAT

MAY BE ABLE TO HELP ? YOU MUST GET SOME DISTRACTION FOR OR SORROW. IF YOU HAVE HOBBIES

IT WOULD BE GOOD TO OCCUPY YOUR TIM.E HOW ABOUT GETTING TOGETHER WITH SOME OF YOUR LADY FRIENDS. OR DO YOU HAVE A CHURCH GROUP THAT MEET EACH MONTH ?

...

HE WOULD TELL YOU/ .........................LIFE GOES ON JUST DON'T FORGET HIM. ............. MARY GENA

PS............. WHEN WE MET IT WAS LOVE @ FIRST ........... SIGHT.. .......... BOTH OF .US...........................

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GenaBenedict
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8 Replies

You seem to have had such an extended period of marriage to one person who was such a soul mate. I know in our case we have been married now for over thirty years and you need to celebrate the time you have had both together. Many couples these days seem to be happy been together for ten years and in a way they would most probably be very lucky to have sixty years of being together.

We had no children because of my disability, so you must be very proud to have made a family who can most probably stay together, who have children who look toward their Grandparents with love. One of the main things you must feel is proud that you have this extended family

So you have had a life with a good man who gave you children and grandchildren. Your memories must be bitter sweet, and rewarding. You have been able to be together and have many memories of a full life and it is that you need to understand that no-one can take those memories away.

Every time you see your adult children you will remember the life you had in the past and bringing them up to adulthood. Now you have your grandchildren and that will extend those wonderful memories together.

When we loose some one close to us it can leave such a wound when we know they have left us. At this time I cannot understand that feeling as we are still both together. Although I do understand that that time will come to one of us and I hope that I go first so as not to feel that lonely lose that one of us will suffer.

All I can really say is you have had an extended period with all things that gives fullness to your relationships and that has been garnished will a loving family and grandchildren. Many new married couples will never be lucky enough to reach that extended period so you need to understand how lucky you are that life has been so kind. So be content on what is left in your family and hopefully you will meet again on the other side.

Personally I was born 1950 and have now been married thirty odd years, so now I am sixty five, so sadly I know that my marriage will not still be there in thirty years time.

only all the good memories that we have had together.

Please give yourself time to recover for your loss, although our memories are bitter sweet and those who are waiting for us will have a great big party in the future when it is our time

BOB

Annie55406 profile image
Annie55406 in reply to

What a beautiful letter you have written . Yes, I do feel grateful and thankful that we had fifty incredible years together. That is a wonderful gift

that not everyone is fortunate enough to experience. It just takes a long time before one can experience a sense of objectivity about it. For so long a time, all one can feel in this incredible sense of loss and loneliness.

But I do thank you for your putting into words the gift I had for fifty years.

You are a wise person.

Annie55406

angelite profile image
angelite

Hi Bob,

Reading Gina's other posts has revealed 2 major health problems-Gina has been type 1 diabetes for 63 years and has recently been diagnosed with Multiple System Atrophy.I feel that both of these may contribute to poor eyesight and account for the use of upper case letters in longer posts.

I frequent the Headway site for Brain Injury and many users type in capital for vision reasons,often leaving one or more blank lines between to space out sentences. Whenever I see a post typed in this way I check other posts for health reasons and reply in the same manner if I feel it is needed : )

Kind regards, Angela x

Good Morning Angela

I did not go through other script so in the future I will leave Gena scripts to those who understand. Her condition

My scripts in many places still stand as most of the problem here is grief and the loss of her life partner of sixty years

BOB

angelite profile image
angelite in reply to

Hi Bob,

It is not my intention to upset anyone and I appreciate the helpful content of your initial response. I would be saddened to see you omit replying to further posts.

I was trying to express a balanced view - that upper case is sometimes used for a medical reason and not necessarily by mistake or as a form of anger.I think the best person to clarify this is Gena.

Kind regards, as always, Angela x

in reply to angelite

Hello Angela

Was not upset, if I have not had past input from someone I may miss out on something. Generally I am not a GP or Specialist and normally I add this at the end of my reply.

This was my first?, time replying to Gena. So when someone knows more regarding a person that is good and I feel it is better to leave that complication and support to someone who understand the writer. We are here to give support in the best, possible way. I was dealing with a lady who had lost the love of Her life and was very lonely.

Upper case is generally not shown here so now I know the reasons for it, I realize now Gena has a medical problem therefore we will need to make allowances. Generally a full or part medical history is not known on this site. We answer accordingly.

No problem, all the best. i have removed the offending blog

BOB

Annie55406 profile image
Annie55406

Dear MARY GENA -

Thank you SO MUCH for your letter. Yes, our situations are incredibly similar.

My husband took care of me 'like a mother hen', and he was the very best husband anyone could ask for. We were married just exactly 50 years.

He was the dominant one and I followed his lead. He was eight years my senior,

so that was natural. And yes, I have prayed that I might join him soon. I just have this huge hole in my heart, and I don't know how to get rid of it.

I, too, have two kids ( sons ) and five grandchildren.

Like you, the only time I feel better is when I keep busy. Right now, I am working on

putting together our family history on both sides. I also go to church and try to take

part in a women's group. Bur it is always so hard to come home......so lonesome.

And yes, I believe he would tell me. "Life goes on.".

I would love to be able to write back and forth to you. You sound like you are so similar to me. Please, would you answer me ? I think that we could support one another. I hope so much that you see my response to your letter to me.

I was away from my computer for a few days, and did not see your response until

today.

Sincerely,

Annie55406

Annie55406 profile image
Annie55406

Gena -

Tell me, did you get my letter to you which I just wrote about 5 minutes ago ?

If you got it OK, then would you send a quick response to me saying that you

received it. The reason I am asking if you got my note is that my computer bombed out on me just as I was clicking the " SUBMIT RESPONSE " key to send my letter to you. So I am not at all sure you got my answer.

Will you let me know, please, if you received my response. I will do it over again

if you didn't get it.

Always,

Annie55406

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