End of my tether - is there a small light at the end of the tunnel?

[Nessie91]

I was diagnosed with agitated clinical depression in October. I'm on 45 mg Mirtazapine and recently was also put on 100 mg Sertraline. I also take 2 x 500 mg Cocodomol. As soon as I wake up, it's like a light bulb goes on and the palpitations and panic attack start - these last till about 6 pm. I also have constant nausea and a crushed disc at the base of my spine? The GP says keep busy, eat little and often and walk (which is difficult as I have muscle weakness in my legs and my balance isn't good.

They tried Trasadone instead of Mirtazapine as I put on 2 stones in weight but I had major tremors on a low dose and am back on Mirtazapine.

I live alone and when I go to bed, feel normal and absolutely dread the following day. Before this, I was totally independent. Now, all I want to do is put my head under the duvet and not face another day.

Ddoes anyone know any good self-hypnosis CDs (or on You Tube) or any support groups I. Scotland?

[Hidden]

Good morning Nessie

Welcome to this Forum, I am sure you will find a lot of support & great advice here. I don't know of self-hypnosis CD's or support groups in Scotland I'm afraid but I can tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel although it may not seem like it at the moment. What you are going through is really really hard. Depression is an illness and the good news is that you will recover from it. You've already done the wisest thing and that is to go & see your GP. Have you asked about talking therapies such as CBT or counselling? Have you heard of mindfulness? It is worth looking this up on the net & trying some of the short guided meditations. Focussing on the present & not on past issues or future worries can provide relief from the constant anxiety. I know you say it is difficult for you to get out and walk, however, I have found that this is the thing that helps me the most. Also making contact with people even just sending a text or an e-mail or posting on this forum helps me to feel less alone.

Well done for reaching out & taking the first steps on the road to recovery. I wish you much strength to continue on this road towards that light at the end of the tunnel. Keep going because you are worth it!

Take care

Pete

[Nessie91 in reply to Hidden]

Dear Pete

Thanks for this. It was a help

[jue1]

Can I ask how Old are you ? I am sorry about you health problems I do not live in Scotland so I cannot say

but what I would do if I could see a consultant over your back to see if anything could be done.

Do not give in - if you are not house bound you could go and see your local yoga teacher and see if he/she could suggest some light exercise worked for a friend of mine with a spinal problem. She attends the group 2 afternoons a week just for 1 hour sessions before she was housebound - in fact I am thinking of going to yoga myself. I hope you find a way around your problem!!!

[Nessie91 in reply to jue1]

Hi

I was a very independent 50 year old. The muscles in m legs are weak and after two and a half weeks in hospital they still don't know what's causing it. I "tick" some of the boxes for Parkinson's but not all and walk with a stick. My balance isn't good. And I have a crushed disc at the base of my spine. Since I overbalanced on the stairs on 31 December, I've lost my confidence walking and the snow doesn't help as I'm frightened of falling. I will certainly think of yoga, though. Thanks for the reply.

[jue1 in reply to Nessie91]

Dear Nessie91 50 is only young to suffer with mobility problems yes I see why you have lossed your confidence following your fall - its a tough one to get over. Make sure you only do the kind of Yoga that is best for you ie slow movement / ask the local Yoga teacher for advice (different types) tell the teacher about your health problems they will be able to tell you what to do and what not to do!!! wait till the weather improves no ice or snow on the ground Take care of yourselve nessie from jue1

[jue1 in reply to jue1]

PS I love the word tether not heard that for a few years now (my Nana was from Paisley I remember her saying it so nice to hear it again) glad you made the step

[Gambit62]

Just a thought as you mention muscle weakness and balance problems as well as the anxiety/depression but have you had your B12 levels checked by your GP as these are all symptoms of B12 deficiency. It can be very difficult to get GPs to listen as many think B12 deficiency is a type of anaemia but although anaemia is a symptom lots of people experience other problems first. If you do manage to get tested then suggest you put results on PAS forum. People often get told their results are normal but there is a huge grey area in which significant numbers of people show strong clinical signs (anything under 500 which is the point where they start treatment in Japan - but as low as 150 can still count as 'normal range' reported by labs in UK

Following site is quite informative about B12 and mental conditions.

b12deficiency.info/b12-and-...

[Nessie91 in reply to Gambit62]

Thanks for this

[Maman2144]

Sorry you feel so bad. Have you asked your GP for walking aids, even using a stick might help. I know it can be hard to face the day but every time you get up is a small triumph. Perhaps you could try yoga, I found a you tube video on Thai chi that I can do at home,maybe there's something on yoga you could try out . Hope you feel brighter soon. Keep talking to this group I find them so understanding and helpful. Regards Lorna

[Nessie91 in reply to Maman2144]

Hi

Do,you have the name of the Tha chi video on You Tube?

Thanks

[Maman2144 in reply to Nessie91]

Tai chi Qi gong with Supawan Green (2014) I found this very helpful. Hope it works for you. I started by doing as much as I could sat down on a dining room chair as I couldn't balance after having my knees replaced. Regards Lorna

[Hidden]

If you are not sure and the doctor refuses to test for it is it a good idea to start taking vitamin B12 anyway and see what if any the effects are? Then if you feel better with b12 maybe that is evidence to take to the doctors? x

[Nessie91 in reply to Hidden]

Thanks for this. Someone else suggested Vitamin b. I think I'll try it as I'm desperate.

[Photogeek in reply to Nessie91]

Hi Nessie

I don't think you should take B12 without consulting Dr. First

As B12 can negatively interact with other medications you

Are taking.

Be careful and get a Blood test, and if you feel your Dr. Is not

Listening to you, change your GP.

Good luck and hope you feel better soon.

Hannah x

[Nessie91]

Hi Hannah

Thanks for the advice. I am just so desperate. I wish there was a self-help group around the Glasgow area in Scotland where I could meet up with people,with similar problems but there doesn't seem to be. I'm just at the desperate stage as the palpitations are non-stop and the doctor has just given me a relaxation tape which doesn't work on dampening the feelings.

[Catmag]

Hi Nessie,

I too live in Glasgow, I was diagnosed with depression in 2012. My GP referred me to a psychiatrist, who has really helped. Also I had regular home visits from an occupational therapist over that period, I now go to the clinic for those appointments. The only programmes I can think of are Steps, which is Glasgow based & Pain Management Scotland.

I have used both of these organisations at different times, for different reasons, over the last 13 years. I found them helpful for why I was there. Your GP should be able to give info on Steps (if not let me know as I have the contact details - somewhere!). Pain management Scotland should be on the Internet.

Do you know you can do a self referral for physiotherapy? That could really help with build up your muscle weakness & confidence, in a safe controlled environment. You could also ask your GP about hydrotherapy. I had a course of that in 2007 & found it very helpful.

I suffer from depression: have had panic & anxiety attacks: have 3 compressed vertebrae in my lumbar spine: have soft tissue damage in my head which causes daily neuralgia & regular migraines: I use a crutch because my right kneecap is out of place and I suffer from whiplash injuries which haven't resolved themselves. So I know how you feel.

I know it's difficult, but I have learned the hard way, if you don't use your muscles & keep mobile, then your physical condition can worsen. I have also found that high pain days are low mood days. So it can become a vicious circle.

Since we are both in Glasgow maybe we can meet, even if it's just for a good moan.

Take care. Catherine.

[Nessie91 in reply to Catmag]

Hi Catherine

It would be nice to meet up and have someone to talk to. I live in the west end but have a car. I like going to the cinema and Concert Hall and play bridge. I' m just going through a bad patch just now which I find is worse as I live alone.

[Catmag in reply to Nessie91]

Hi,

That's fine with me. I have a few things on this week, so why don't we arrange to meet at St. Enoch's at the doors to BHS say Wednesday 28 Jan at 12:30. If that's not suitable let me know.

Cheers, Catherine.

[Nessie91 in reply to Catmag]

My best days are Thursday 29 or Friday 30I. have GP appointments, hospital a appointments, visits from the psychiatric nurse, etc. could we possibly make it a Thursday or Friday? Also, could we make it the Boots end rather than BHS as it's a bit far for me to walk from St Enoch subway?

I'm tall, blond and have a stick. If it's wet, I'll be wearing a dark grey or blue raincoat and if dry, a beige jacket with fur on the hood!

[Catmag in reply to Nessie91]

Hi,

Thursday 29 suits me fine. Boots is ok, I use the disable parking at BHS end, so I might be a bit after 12:30. I am wee, fat using a crutch and will wearing a beige puffer style coat.

See you then, all being well. Catherine.

[Nessie91 in reply to Catmag]

Look forward to it.

Best wishes Pat

[Nessie91 in reply to Catmag]

Hadn"t realised you had walking problems which sound worse than mine. If it's easier, I could take the car although I don't have a disabled sticker I think there s a car park at the BHS stores end and meet you there. Could you confirm if you'd rather do this so that we don't end up each standing at a different location!

I'm just rarely in town as I go to Braehead or Silverburn and on the rare occasion that I do go, it's to Buchanan Galleries, so I don"t really know Argyll Street very well. It's not a problem, though as I think I can get to BHS coming down the High Street.

[Catmag in reply to Nessie91]

Hi Pat,

I am good with Silverburn if that suits you better?

I can also make Boots in St Enochs. Either is fine with me. Silverburn is quite good, as there are quite a few eating places.

Let me know, either suits me.

Take care, Catherine.

[Nessie91 in reply to Catmag]

How about Silverburn then? Although I live in the west end, it's just down the M77. What I don't know is the disabled parking. I usually park at the side of M & S so that I enter the store where all the food is (and the cash tills are on your left). If there is disabled parking for you there, we could meet just inside. If not, let me know where would be best for you.

Best wishes

Pat

[Nessie91 in reply to Catmag]

Please see below for Silverburn.. In case we get lost my mobile number is 07766178481

[Nessie91 in reply to Catmag]

Hadn"t realised you had walking problems which sound worse than mine. If it's easier, I could take the car although I don't have a disabled sticker I think there s a car park at the BHS stores end and meet you there. Could you confirm if you'd rather do this so that we don't end up each standing at a different location!

I'm just rarely in town as I go to Braehead or Silverburn and on the rare occasion that I do go, it's to Buchanan Galleries, so I don"t really know Argyll Street very well. It's not a problem, though as I think I can get to BHS coming down the High Street.

[Nessie91 in reply to Catmag]

Hadn"t realised you had walking problems which sound worse than mine. If it's easier, I could take the car although I don't have a disabled sticker I think there s a car park at the BHS stores end and meet you there. Could you confirm if you'd rather do this so that we don't end up each standing at a different location!

I'm just rarely in town as I go to Braehead or Silverburn and on the rare occasion that I do go, it's to Buchanan Galleries, so I don"t really know Argyll Street very well. It's not a problem, though as I think I can get to BHS coming down the High Street.

[Nessie91]

In case you miss the reply above, I've suggested Silverburn at the M & S food entrance if that suits you!

[Nessie91]

In case you miss the reply above, I've suggested Silverburn at the M & S food entrance if that suits you!

[Nessie91 in reply to Nessie91]

Hi Catherine

I've left my mobile number none of the posts above in case we miss each other at Silverburn.

Best wishes

Pat

[Catmag]

Hi Pat,

That's fine. I have your number so will call if there is any difficulty.

Take care, Catherine.