Really upset anxiety new job

Hi .Ive started a new job at a nursery and have really bad anxiety and am nervous.I think I'm doing rubbish and making mistakes such as signing in on wrong sheet .my manager said I needed to speed up and I think the manager and staff have been talking about how rubbish i am and observing me.I don't have any child care qualification which they knew when taking me thinking i should quit as am letting them all down.i worry all the time and cant stop crying

4 Replies


Sorry you feel like this. It is usual to feel anxious about starting a new job so don't beat yourself up about that. If you didn't feel some anxiety then it would mean you didn't care or were so arrogant you thought you knew it all. I've had quite a few first days and have done quite a few silly things learning new skills.

You don't have a child care qualification and your employers know that. They saw qualities in you which they thought would be suited to the job. Give yourself some credit for that. They must know that you will need some training if you don't have qualifications or experience.

It seems to me that you really care about this job and it is something you would like to pursue. If that is the case, would you be able speak to your manager about how you are feeling? It would show that you are proactive and keen and might put your mind at rest. Perhaps suggest 'shadowing' someone for a day or so to see how things need to be done. Or having a mentor that you could ask questions too.

Good luck,

Sarah xxx


Hi, I am assuming you like children! Focus on them more and not who may be watching you, try to enjoy each and every conversation you have with the little terrors they are your little stars that will love you for who you are, that’s what kids do, they love attention, they love having assistants that like them :-)

This in turn will give you something to contribute to managers if they ask how you are doing, you will then be able to say something about the children that you are slowly getting to know rather than worry about silly bits of paper or that side of the job? just smile back and say sorry, didn’t mean to sign in the wrong place or fill something incorrectly! I assure you even managers make blunders when they have been doing the same thing for years!! as a manager it’s their job to empower you to be great not the other way round, try not to worry too much about impressing them as they will see your actions more by your interactions to the children, we all have an inner child inside of us, so let yours out and have fun working with the little ones more. :-)

Worrying about what others are thinking is a waste of energy as you will honestly never know what they think and when they do say something, please don’t always take it as a personal criticism but more that they are there to help you achieve your potential. If it goes pear shaped, then they are obviously not so good at being managers themselves that they were unable to help you, the next ones will perhaps be better. if you worry too much about what you do wrong it’s more likely to go wrong, if you concentrate on what you can do, it really does change the focus of things.

Hope the days get better as your confidence grows and grows xxxx


Don't quit! See this as a challenge and prove to them that you are going to be a great nursery nurse! It's a lack of confidence, that's all...we all get it when starting new things that are out of our comfort zone! But it sounds like you don't have the support you need. Try talking to your manager about how you is her responsibility to make sure that you are getting the support and guidance that you should have. Hang in there!!


I know how you feel. I've been there a few times, Hun.

Your anxiety will only hold you back here. It becomes a downward spiral doesn't it? The more you panic the worse your job performance is.

I'm not sure what to advise here. From my own experience, I would say leave the job. But it's not so easy to find another one quickly to replace it.

It may be worth accepting that you are going to lose the job and apply for other ones right now. That way you will be as prepared as possible if the time comes when they ask you to leave. If you get offered another job in the meantime I would take it. There's no point in staying there if it is continuing to bring down your confidence.

But it is also possible that you are seeing things as worse than they are. When I got those feelings my head became so clouded and I couldn't make head nor tail of it all.

Maybe you could try speaking to your boss? That sometimes can help, or possibly make things worse depending on your boss. It is ultimately your decision but the job isn't good for your health if it is making you anxious.

Good luck xx


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