Medication

[butterflykiss]

I used to be on prozac for a few year's but things still were not getting any better. I am now on VENSIR XL 225mg daily, QUETIPINE 25mg 1 twice daily and DIAZEPAM 5mg 3 a day plus TEMAZEPAM 20mg at night.....yet I feel more suicidal than ever before. Has anyone else been on any of these and how did they work for you..Really at my loosing it point...

[Jeffju]

I don't know how long you have been taking these tablets but I know it's not unusual to have a 'down' time before they start to kick in. I know I did. But if you have been on them a while I would check with your GP. Thinking of you, Julie xx

[Carolinee71]

Hi sorry to hear that you are still feeling down, I would as Julie said go back to your GP if he prescribed them or contact the doctor who did. I have not heard of Vensir, but I take lorazepam which is similar to both your diazepam and temazepam which help me calm do and get control of my emotions but I don't think they have a build up effect so I have to just take them as and when I need to.

I take escitalopram 20 mg and I also take quetiapine 150 mg's hitch is a lot higher than you. I started off on 25 mg and like you did not feel any better if anything felt worse. When I told my doctor he just increased the dose. After a while I did and do find I was feeling a bit better but it did take about 3months to feel the improvement.

So keep on it but talk to doctor and I hope you start to feel better soon

Soft hugs

Caroline

[butterflykiss]

I have been on antidepressants from I was 20.I have gone threw so many different ones that it seems nothing is working for me right now. I have made an appointment to see my doctor but I have to wait 19 days to see her and thats making me anxious also. Thank you Jeff and Caroline, it really helps when you get a answer back and you feel then not so alone x

[Hidden]

Hi,

Sometimes medication is not the answer. If you are continuing to feel bad over a long period of time it would be worthwhile seeing whether there is any way of finding a skilled therapist to talk things through with. Your GP could refer you but in practice due to the cuts in services you may find only CBT is available, which can be useful; but not always a long term solution as symptoms are often found to return. If you could afford to see someone privately that may be an option. You could use this website as somewhere to really talk through how you are feeling, not just about the meds but about yourself and their life? There is a wealth of understanding and support within those of us who use the site.

Suexx

[butterflykiss]

Hi secondhandrose

I have just started with a long term therapist..I had been to nearly every department they have but as you say its not helping with all the cuts that have been made concerning mental health. I have had 2 CPN even tho i was tested at the mental health office by the Gang and they told me then that i would need long term to the extent of maybe 5-10 yrs.Yes even i was shocked when they said that but i was sent back to the CPN again and around again. There needs to be more information for people with any kind of mental issue available but the right information. I have been to see him 4 times and we are still only at the getting to no each other bit but thats usual when you have trust issues isn't it. I have been to so many other treatments for depression..Yes I paid myself for these treatments and i don't want to mention any as they may work for others but i do think because mine is so deep rooted its so hard to begin with just 1 issue.( Abuse age 4-13, step-dad 2 uncles 1 family friend) and thats just a glimps..I am 48 now and all I want is to live a life, feel the wind,rain, i want to laugh loud and most of all i want to be loved....

Thank you for answering

I do remember your name from a while back

Always very wise words

xxx

[Hidden in reply to butterflykiss]

Hi

As a trained therapist I don't know how anyone can think they KNOW you need 4-5 years!

It sounds as though you feel you are in need of help, but you say very clearly at the end of your writing that most of all you want to be loved. We all want to be loved, it's a human need and wish, but you will be looking for the love you feel wasn't there for you when you were a child. I know that feeling, but sadly the reality is we never can have the love we needed at the time as we are adults although we may often feel like children.

It is great that you are in long term therapy. You say you have trust issues but your writing demonstrates an ability to share how you are feeling in an open way and that's a sign of trust. I think the issue is more likely to be how you can be helped to grieve what you did not have in the past and begin to find what you can have in the present and future.

You had particular difficulties in the past that make it difficult to allow intimacy without fear of further abuse but talking honestly with a therapist will be the most productive way for you to move forward and create the life you want for yourself. Yes, it does take time to trust but if you feel the therapist is safe and keeps good professional boundaries you have little to risk by being as open as you are able to be. The only risk is being hurt and you already survive that.

I don't know whether you have a partner or close friends but you say you feel unloved and I am wondering whether there are people in your life who care about you but not in ways you identify as love. Feeling loved comes from within, from having felt loved in the past by our parents or other significant people. If you do not feel loved it will leave you being unable to recognise love because you will be comparing to the love you needed and ought to have had in the past. If you do not have partners or a friend you will be lonely as we all need relationships.

I do hope you find therapy helpful. If there are any feelings you are currently unable to share with the therapist you could write them down and take them into a session so that you both understand those are things you do want to be able to talk about in time, that's a very useful halfway step.

Take care,

Suexx

[butterflykiss]

Hi Sue

You wouldn't believe how many people have told me that yes i can give advice but when it comes back to myself then thats the problem. Having gone threw so much from a young age has givin me a understanding of the feelings that follow when you have been abused ect...I mention what i have been threw but thats as far as i go..I have never went deeper into my own feelings, emotions or thoughts. My list is like a shopping list with the brands but no description if you understand me. My life changed aged 4 and i am now 48 so 44yrs of built up emotions ect..so i can see why they reckon it is gona take a while to nock down my cement reinforced walls. This is why it's also the love bit. I am so closed in yet in another way i will talk to some one who just want's to talk..I never force anyone to talk but i also say if asked about an issue that it's "only my own opinion" i would never tell any one to do this or that but as i have said when it comes to myself i become deaf and my therapist has noticed this himself. he noticed that when i talk i will turn the table round(not realising im doing it)and i start asking him questions. So you see thats me, maybe i am still running away and that my way of dealing with things..

I have few friends..trust issues

my own family are not bad but my extended family, i may as well be dead apart from 1 older brother and his wife who are very supportive..

My ex partner/friend well thats a issue that i am trying to work out right now

Thank you so much for you fantastic words of help

your a very caring and understanding person

Butterfly kiss xxx