Silly little things.

[trachet]

I spent an hour at church on Saturday hovering and cleaning a room for a special event this Thursday. It was quite a cathartic experience. I was on my own, seeing progress and no one was moaning at me that I was doing anything wrong and the end result was good. (I never realised that cleaning could feel so good!)

Yesterday after the service I walked in the room where they were now having tea and biscuits and informed everyone that any crumbs must be licked up! 2 minutes later 1 person opened a packet of biscuits then deliberately emptied the crumbs from the packet on the carpet. When everyone told me she just looked at me and gave a horrible smile/smirk.

This person used to be a 'friend' I have been so nice to her over the years, we even went on holiday to Greece in which I ended up paying for half of her holiday! I have had to listen to her relationship woes, (it's always the partner 's problem!) And given her numerous rides in my car. Last year she suddenly, for no reason I'm aware of, decided to make my life as awkward as possible when she is around.

Anyhow after the biscuitgate incident I left church before I did or said anything I'd regret. Got in my car seething. I live in Portsmouth so it is very urban. Around the corner there is a small strip of grass that people use as a dog loo. As I was going past this grass area I saw what I thought was a large shaggy dog, slightly smaller than a great dane. I suddenly realised it was a small horse! Not what I expect to see in the middle of a street in a city.

When I got home turned on FB and a post came up saying - Dear Lord,

Grant me the serenity to accept stupid people the way they are,

The courage to maintain my self control,

And the wisdom to know that if I act on it I will go to jail!

Enough said

[Hidden]

My goodness some people are sent to try us!!!

I think because they know we are nice and once they become aware we are sensitive it seems to awaken a bully type of character in them....I've had similar things happen to me,

I wish I just didn't worry about people....

Sue xxx

[Hidden]

Hi

I'm sorry you had such a difficult time with the person at church - sounds as if she was being really quite sadistic towards you but walking away from what she did may not help you in the long term. Perhaps if she does something similar again you could caringly say (quite loudly) how sad it is that she has to do something hurtful as if it funny, or something like that. Probably you turn the other cheek but she needs stopping as she may well do the same thing to someone else, perhaps someone even less able to take it than you are and that could even push them into harming themselves. She is a bully and there's nothing clever about what she is doing. There is a halfway between acting on your anger and asserting yourself - if you are unable to do the latter maybe it would help to go to sassertiveness classes so that you can defend yourself in a healthy way? It sounds like you're managing to get over it, I hope you are. Suexx

[trachet in reply to Hidden]

Dear Sues

Thanks for both your comments. I just have to think that I am stronger and nicer than her. Fortunately everyone knows me and they know her! It was only last week when someone else was asking what was her problem as they had not seen her for ages and the last time they had she had snubbed them. This person is unemployed and feels that this status is unfair (I wonder why?)

I will do my best to assert myself in future and recommend she gets herself sorted out.

Have a good week

Tracey xx

[Hidden in reply to trachet]

Hi Tracey

The bully must be having a hard time as well then if she is unemployed and feels a sense of injustice. It sounds as though she doesn't know how to deal with her anger about that (something I can identify with!) and directs it at anybody. Perhaps she needs a friend? I wonder whether the vicar might be able to offer her understanding and support, a quiet word with him might be needed? Suexx

[trachet in reply to Hidden]

Ta Sue,

The vicar is starting on Thursday so I will be seeing quite a bit of the new vicar and after a month I will see how the situation develops. As for friends she uses us a lot and then something snaps in her and all her friends end up being her enemies in her eyes. We all keep trying to be friendly though.

I'm going to try to be strong as I know I am an integral part of the church community.

Tracey xx

[Jeffju]

Love the last piece ... great stuff. Your 'friend' is not showing very Christian like manners is she???? I pray and believe that God is looking after me but people like your 'friend' are the reason I don't go to Church as I think they are so hypocritical. So I just manage my faith between me and the Lord in my own way. Love your blog and hope that you are feeling better now. xx

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