Over thinking

[Angelx01x]

Hi all.

I’m just after a bit of advice...how do I stop overthinking? I’ve been diagnosed with discoid on my scalp with scaring and non scaring alopecia, but waiting to see rheumatologist re SLE. But I can’t help but over think. It’s taking over my life. Every ache, if I’m having a particular lightheaded/dizzy day, gets me worried. Ive been having chest pain, radiating into my left arm, I’ve been and has my heart checked and all is ok thank goodness so now all I’m thinking “its lupus”? I just need to find a way to stop thinking about it until I’ve had my rheumatologist apt and maybe find out a bit more. It’s a vicious circle because then I get stressed and then the brain fog gets worse and then the discoid flares up.

Thank you 😊

[Andfiona]

So sorry to hear this. I don’t know if this is helpful but when I was diagnosed it completely changed the whole way I saw myself. A bit like going from not being a parent to being a parent was similar in magnitude to being healthy to having a lifelong chronic condition if that makes any sense. I spent time reading every leaflet produced by Lupus Uk and other information too from the British Society of Rheumatology and other sources too. Reading more about lupus helped me to feel more informed and a tiny bit more in control. But also spending some time not doing that too was important, going for walks, planting seeds, reading, other things to balance out a bit. It’s easy to over think lupus because anything that’s up could be lupus, could be the medicines or could be something else. It’s difficult for the specialists to know sometimes. I used to find my dermatologist and rheumatologist has different takes on issues and treatment options! Anyway take care, hopefully the rheumatology will be able to give you a bit of reassurance when you speak to them. 😊

[Angelx01x in reply to Andfiona]

Thank you for this Andfiona. Your right, I just need to try and manage this so I spend some time getting to understand lupus and what’s going on, but also to spend time away from focusing on it. I’ve been at work throughout lockdown, I’m a key worker, which has also worried me more as I wasn’t sure what I should be doing, isolating wise, but that seems to have become easier as time has gone on.

Thanks again

[miccika1]

It is not easy to adjust to the new health conditions on your own. I suggest finding a good behavioural psychologist. I found one specialized in helping people with chronic conditions and he has been a life saver. Also it's good in general to take care of mental health and learn coping technique's that are proven to work well...

[Hamptons]

I guess it’s about thinking differently. The answer to could it be Lupus is yes, it could but it could not be. I try to not give the lupus oxygen or it suffocates you and life stagnates. It’s the balance. Being a person who doesn’t deal with things I ignored it for many years and ploughed on. Refused to let it stop me doing stuff even if that meant dead days afterwards from being tired. It won, as it then gave me a massive flare and I had to face it in a new way.

However, I still try and change my thinking when things happen , could it be lupus is always my first thought But I then do the but it might not be. I am learning that 9/10 it’s not, but lupus may not help what it is. As best I can I try to live the life I want with a few adaptions, I find unless symptoms are off the scale I try to manage things my self as doctors can either be patronising and do the ‘you have lupus what do you expect thing’ or give drugs which make symptoms worse (sometimes). I also had a fab gp who gave practical solutions once it got bad.

Knowledge is good and understanding what lupus is and isn’t but don’t overwhelm yourself as there is such much to the illness and you may only experience bits of it so learn about your bits. This does give a sense of control but you can know more than your gp so be prepared.

Find out what are your no compromise bits In life, and make them happen somehow. Live life with lupus not let lupus live your life.

Oh and get a sunflower lanyard as they save so many words.

Good luck.

[Angelx01x in reply to Hamptons]

Thank you very much for your all your guidance and support.

I think I need to work on my thought process and pattern and find ways to de-stress/focus on lupus and more on how I’m not going to let it beat me.

[Cann]

I have the same problem and I do my best to distract myself with all sorts including sewing, gardening, walking, cooking, meditation, etc. Getting out in nature is a great distraction. Yesterday when I was weeding in my garden even though I didn't feel good health-wise, I get pains everywhere and even bleeding, this robin came up beside me and just looked at me for about a minute and I chatted to him saying he was lovely and not to trust the cats like he was trusting me!

I learnt a long time ago that the conventional system doesn't have the answers for me and rather than wasting valuable time, I must do my best to help myself. There is so much physical stress on our bodies as well as mental these days that we can only do our best. Emailing is another distraction and sending good energies to each other, too.

Deep breathing into the abdomen at least 3 times and breathe out through the mouth relaxing all the body to help release the tensions. All the best.