I just felt something slither across my foot - I looked down and it was VG's snake! How on earth did he manage to get onto the forum?
I have put him in the fridge - well, snakes are cold-blooded, aren't they? - and he has eaten a block of cheddar and two raspberry yogurts. He's now gone to sleep curled up in the salad bowl, so please can you send a Roman soldier to pick him up and take him home?
He's rather cute, shall miss him when he's gone!
Nooooo moffy he has to be kept warm.... Put him in your bra or central hearing cupboard , whichever is biggest.....and he's on a diet if I am we all are.... If he gets too chilled he tends to poo and its VERY messy, but actually how did you get that photo that's EXACTLY the smirk he uses when he sees my OHs fingers
Oh as to how he escaped.... Ummm I wanted a pole to practice my pole dancing and he was the longest thing around .. But he refused to stay upright and obviously went looking for a more sympathetic home... I don't have a roman soldier at the moment Gins has then all in her shower so let me send you a frozen mouse for his dinner tomorrow and I,ll pick him up at the weekend...
PS he only drinks filtered water he is very fussy
VG x
He looks a bit big for poor Moffy's bra VG, that's also a bit imposing because what would poor Moffy wear, she would have to go au naturel! 
xxxx
It's OK VG - I have put him on the bathroom radiator to keep him warm - and he's handy to the toilet if he wants to do a snakey - poo!
If you had put him in the fridge before you wanted to use him as a pole, you would have had much more success - he went quite rigid! He looks a bit better now he's getting warm.
Am filtering some water, but he drank a bottle of wine while he was in the fridge, so he probably won't be thirsty for a while. I've never seen a snake smile before!
Moffy x
All this pampering he won't want to come home.... And when he does will probably demand a menu and a wine list every week..... Plus a heated towel to sleep on.....
On the bright side if you can toilet train him before I find a roman centurion to collect him it would be much appreciated
Yours busily printing out menus and wine lists
VG x
Moffy have you seen my lactose free cheese and yogurts? I put them in the fridge and now they have gone wrappers and all?
PP xxx
VG's snake looks a bit lumpy around the mid-section - and he's smiling again! How's your wine rack - does it have any spaces? xxx
A bit sparse at the moment, hic!
How am I going to explain a hungover snake to the vet..... And who do I charge if he has a drink problem cos no one in my house drinks so buying the snake a bottle of wine a week will add to my shopping bill.... Sorry moffy you are going to have him stay over until he has done his cold turkey umm make that cold snakey he will just eat the turkey
VG x
Looks like I have a foster snake. 
Pythonally speaking, I am glad to have someone to finish up the left-overs. I might have to send him to Alcoholicsssss Anonymoussssss, though!
Moffy x
His name is leroy he does come when he is called and his favourite game is sitting on the washing machine when it's spinning
VGx
Leroy? LEROY????? That's the best ever! Laffs uncontrollably! 
xxxxx
Sorry my son named him ......
VGx
Moffy please explain to Libby about your cut price breast enlargements that you never got cos your plastic surgeon crumbled to dust but you had purchased some larger bras in anticipation.... for some reason the site won't let me reply to Libby's post ... Hmmm perhaps she has blocked me and is using the 404 error message
VG 
She's just got her head inside one of the huge bras, I expect! Will check! xxxx
noooooooo! not the washing machine.
Is it a man thing????
He's on the move....
Stop the world; I want to get off!
Husbands had a stroke
Husband diagnosed with ME 
