Woke up today all prepared for the end of the world and instead it was raining as it has been non stop since October... The bits of my skin not covered in candle wax have gone like a prune.... Then a thought struck me... It was wrapped round a stone, I suspect thrown by Sandra99b as Libby and Gins SAY they are too busy baking...... Anyway its obvious the Mayans mixed up the end of the world with the plot of star trek 4 where an alien craft makes it rain constantly eventually bringing about the end of the world cos they can't find the humpbacked whales... So I am going to attempt time travel on my mobility scooter back to the 1980,s and bring back two humpback whales called George and Gracie in my shopping basket thereby saving the world.. Have donned sequinned outfit with shoulder pads , and big hair so I should blend in quite well
See you all ... well now .... if the time travel works though I am not quite sure if the whales will fit in my garden pond....
VG x
Written by
Extremelygrumpy
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
hahaha that's a good supposition about Star Trek 4 lol!!
I live in north Devon where it rains a lot anyway, so am developing webbed feet I feel sorry for those poor souls who've been flooded out for the umpteenth time. Am taking a wild guess that there will be no snow this Christmas!
We can't have too many humpbacks and would love to be there when you try to coax one onto your scooter if they won't fit in the pond, how about the bath?
I'm glad that you are correctly attired for your world-saving mission - too many super-hero's these days just don't pay attention to these kinds of details!
I now have two humpbacked whales in my pond... It's amazing what you can do with a mobility scooter and ironing board and a stunt kite... My OH came home from work and is now outside making whale noises and feeding them the neighbours koi carp... I guess we will be off their Christmas card list next year but the world is safe the only problem is I managed to return back to 2012 with the complete box set of dynasty on video... Anyone got a video player???
VG x
So you look like a wrinkled prune now VG, not a good look for the festive season, for goodness sake be careful. Slap lots of moisturiser or E45 cream on and hopefully you'll be as smooth as a baby's bottom by Christmas dinner time!
So now you're using your mobility scooter as a space ship and time machine! I love the idea about Star Trek and your clothes sound wonderfully appropriate although I'm not sure the general public are ready for VG launching into another age lol! The mind boggles!
I guess that takes care of the ironing over Christmas if the ironing board has become part of your intergalactic space ship!
Thank goodness you returned safely, I'm not sure we'd all survive 2013 without hearing about all your escapades VG, you really are an inspiration along with being quite a worry too, but in the nicest possible way! Bless you!
Tumble dryer don't know how I manged without it I have about 4 items to iron a week some weeks nothing blame sammicat for the loss of my ironing board and the stunt kite,, she came up with an amazing idea for catching whales much easier than transparent aluminium and a Klingon spaceship... One rather worry thing thing though I like these shoulder pads and sequins....
So you wait to tell me this after I have gone through the trauma of dressing like Joan Collins , wrecking my ironing board and sons kite... and letting my OH steal the neighbours fish when you could have used your mini to get to Wales , I could have driven myself in your mini if there were only left turns , my neck doesn't turn right ...... Can you please come over and collect the whales please I can't hear the TV for whales song and they only know two carols so it's getting a little repetitive
VG x
Haha! I've only just stopped laughing! That was priceless Sandra lol!
Your neck only turns to the left VG! If you were driving Sandra's Mini that means you'd only be going round and round in circles constantly turning left lol! Oh dear, I need a lie down lol! I'm giving myself stitch here lol!
Groans at the joke , but at least i understood it unlike gins jokes i am sure there was no answer to her last two ........ I like the idea of releasing them in your friends bath .... We could paint them grey and tell her they are dolphins and swimming with dolphins is very therapeutic
After seeing my neighbours face at his now empty pond .. We made a hasty trip to the beach early this morning and set them free they were last spotted heading up the coast towards Scotland ... Two close neighbours both play the bag pipes it's an acquired taste... But the whales loved it....
So all is well
Sanity is returned.... Next time I attempt time travel to save the world I shall bring back something small and inanimate yet tasteful.....
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
I feel sorry for those poor souls who've been flooded out for the umpteenth time. Am taking a wild guess that there will be no snow this Christmas! 
if they won't fit in the pond, how about the bath?
humpty dumpty and the whale
PIP HELP PLEASE 
finally depression has got me
