Relationships!!!!

[Homer]

I've been struggling with my relationship for a few months now, one min I adore him, the next just want too run away, how do I know if it's real, I love him, can't help feeling its Fibro related he's hard working , good dad, I'm even picking fault with his dad duties!!!! The more grumpy I get the worse it is, it just seems one big vicious circle for me , why can't my mood just be stable, it's never been this unstable, it's got to be Fibro related, wanted to post this for a while just didn't want my husband to be made too feel like he was bad

Hope all well as can be expected

Regards Nicki xxxx

[fairycazzie]

Hi there,

have to say that is what the illness is a viscious circle, worry, stress and symptoms.

Our relationship has had its ups and downs and i believe that the Mrnastyfm side has a lot to answer for .

sometimes i wished he would leave for freedom!! but then who would help me with my flares and when i cannot butter a sandwich or open a tin (like i am now)

I believe it is just a phase so be strong!!!!

Think of what you was like before FM

how do you generally get on in your relationship and does your hubby understand and is he very helpful to you with everything.

It is understandible as my opinion is its kind of test in seeing how much they cope with your fireworks.

if he a great dad and works hard and helps and is there for you then i think your going to have to ask for some help via gp to control this anger , this is what i would do!!! honestly i have had to ask for help 15 years ago with severe depression i was making life hell.

I offered my hubby to leave at one point as i did not want him to put up with what was happening as i not nasty in any way and i was smashing plates and hating him and wishing him leave, but after talking and talking and seeing Dr's and him being there he told me to never ever suggest he leave and find some one new as our vows are everything and he said if my engine dont work then the key is lost, (if you get me as it involves everything)

for me this changed me i think in a way as i realised how much he does value our marriage,

my ex would just lounge about on sofa as hard working as he is/was and command the kids to do the jobs for me (thats past though)

i did say to my hubby ..rite... well... you have made this decision to put up wiht every thing it involves and you got to try not get fed up with my moans and groans so if in the future you are distracted and some lovely lady catches your eye because the engines dead in this house then that is when the bomb will explode and there be no forgiveness.

truly just hang on xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Homer]

Thank you, I did offer him to leave so he don't have to put up with me, he did say no , maybe il speak to docs about anger I don't like being horrible and I'm fed up of my own voice!!!!! But can't seem to help it xxx

Regards Nicki xxxx

[ladymoth]

Hi Homer,

I think you should speak to your GP and tell him about your difficulties. Pain and illness change relationships, and counselling may help to settle things down a bit so that you can look at your options.

Whatever you do, don't suffer in silence. We're all here for you, but professional help can be very useful at times like this!

Cuddly hugs ... Moffy x

[joflo]

Hi Nikki , I've been with my husband 12 years and have fibro for 6 / 7 years, when my husband and I met I had a son from a previous marriage , I had my own business, and was a very strong confident women , then I started with fibromyalgia I was luckily diagnosed very quickly ,But my health took a complete nose dive, and to cut a very long story short within 2 years I'd lost my son ( he moved to live with his father in Canada ) my business , my health , my confidence ! I felt like I didn't belong anymore, probably looking back I'd hit rock bottom , I also offered a way out for my husband , but he asked me if it was the other way round would I leave him to which of course I answered I wouldn't dream of it ! He then said well now you know that's how I feel , It's so easy to take our frustrations out on those we love the most , I often apologise before I know I'm going to have a bad day , or make a conscious effort to count to 10 or 100 before my temper lifts her ugly head , keep on talking about how you both feel its the only way forward it will make you both a long stronger as a couple ! Good luck Xx