Fibromyalgia Action UK
38,743 members51,005 posts

avoiding ppl when ur so down

pains just so bad moving & breathing is hard & uncomfortable. I seen my therapist today and she is so worried she has taken to calling me to check i am ok :( i need to be more mobile but the only way is in a wheelchair maye that is why i am so down because of the acceptance of this ! i cant afford a wheelchair how do i go about getting one ? i am so depressd i am avoiding talkng to ppl because all i do is cry i am so fed up sorry about the moaning :( times like this i wish my kids had a better mum :(

10 Replies

Hi Amanda. So sorry to hear what you are feeling, Do you use crutches at the moment? You should try adult social care they are usually very good. I have started using crutches (my choice so i can move around when my legs dont want to work) but i had a ASC worker come and make some adaptations around my home to be able to stay a little more independent.

I know what you mean about avoiding people i do the same, but you need to see your doc about anti depressants. I know you may not want to go on them but they may help. And please dont worry your kids will love you any way you are. I used to feel the same, always too ill to go anywhere, always too depressed etc but i still got a good relationship with them all.

Dont apologise as i keep getting told for moaning. We are all here for one another..

Gentle hugs and thoughts for you. xx


hiya i use 1 crutch at the moment. I had an occupational therapist come to my flat and she made a report to my housing about adaptations but the arent doign anything even the council wanted medical assesment forms about why i need to move and they decided i dont need to move as housing isnt affecting my health !! living in a 2 bedroom flat with 17 yr old daughter & 5 yr old son & and my son is in my room as he doesnt have his own ! flat on 2nd floor with dodgey lift but they said thats down to the landlords :( i have been on anti-depressent for yrs waiting to change onto valium which was suggested by my rheumatologist as well as gabapentin so should see doc this wk maybe things will look up soon xx thank u gentle (((hugs))) to u too xx


It was the adult social care sent me an OT. She was great, she didnt go through housing for the stuff i needed, and even the council guy said i should be entitled to a bungalow but they are in such short supply here. If like these last few weeks i have had more bad than good days i stay in my room as the stairs kill me even with handrails etc. That doesnt seem roght you have a 17yr old girl and a 5 year old son the council should be rehoming you to at least a ground floor 3 bed flat or in my case they gave me and my son a 2 bed house cos i cant live in a flat.

I told my doc i wanted to go on prozac as only thing that helps with mine. Keep trying hun i know its strressful but you will be surprised at what people with fibro are entitled too. Ok we may not all get it, guess depends where you live but you definately need more help than you getting.

Will be thinking of you. xx


hi have you been on e bay or sometimes if you have a disabillity shop in your town they have them oer local paper or call your GP and they may put you in touch with social services good luck love diddle x


Dear Amanda,

Don't give up. I have been depressed and know where you are coming from. It makes life so much harder to deal with without FM.

Regarding a wheelchair, it will give you back a bit of your freedom but if you claim DLA you should be able to use a little of it to get a mobility scooter so you can get to the shops/school etc. You do not need to buy a wheelchair, because there are people out there who will help you. The Red Cross may be able to loan you won whilst you look into it, but I bought one only to be told that my doctor could refer me to the hospital who have a wheelchair facility! I am busy selling my chair at the moment on ebay for less than I paid for it - but its collection only. We will deliver if it turns out the buyer is nearby though.

So you could check ebay out, but what about Freegle? Become a member, share your old stuff - we just got rid of a rusted lawnmower within four hours! Ask on there for a wheelchair and if someone has one they no longer want... But I am sure you should get one for free. A wheelchair not a rusty lawnmower!

Besides that Social Services should be able to help you anyway. Who is your Social Worker? Make them do the work they are paid for!

You are a bright and vital person, who have children who adore you I am certain. They will remember the special moments when you spent probably only minutes with them on one to one time more than the rest. My mother is mortified that I don't recall all we did. My daughters are the same, they remember the strangest things and my grandchildren barely notice the wheelchair and mobility scooter. Don't let using these things upset you. They are a tool to help you, they are not an appendage! It may seem odd but people you love will see you, not the equipment. Do you think of your friends as part of their furniture?

Do try and get some sunshine, its helped me a lot the past week. Hide in the open.

Get those social workers working to help you get what you need and contact them regularly. Once a week is enough.

Take care and I wish I could give you a hug. Sending you soft hugs anyway!


I agree with everything Sarah-Jane has had to say.

Please dont say your children should have a better mum, I know they wouldn't trade you for anything, because thats how kids see their mums. 'THEIR'S, and you are everything they WANT and NEED.




me to susan... i suffer depression and fibro.. occupational therepists or social work department can help.. my friend got one from them.. i was lucky enough to buy one £80 out of costco... but social services got me a o.t and i have been given a rising electric chair.. bathing things... hand rails ect.. so please contact them... and on the fact about ur kids, they will be fine.. i been like this for years and years and my kids are fine.. hope ur okxxxx


thank u all for u help & support its really hard keeping myself from slipping into such a deep depression but just knowing others know how i feel is such a help its everyones kindness that has helped me through this really hard time. I have decided 2morro gonna get my grandads wheelchair to borrow as he doesnt use it much then get help to do a bit of shopping and on weds get an appt to see my doc to sort out meds & ot or some help cant go on in so much pain & depressinon i just wanna sleep forever or just sit in a quite garden somewhere where there is nobody else xxxxxx gentle (((hugs))) to u all xxxxx


hey amanda just on the off chance you could get in touch with the red cross they loan them out or they used to but talk to your gp about your meds for depression i was in the same place as you and still there most of the time but i bit the bullet and spoke to my gp and then opened up to my children and admitted just how low i was/am i hope you get the help you need gentle hugs xx


hang on in there Amanda. folks on here have made some good suggestions.


You may also like...