Was given these drugs for along time to stabilise my 24/7 pain caused by fibromyalgia.These drugs have altered my life in a terrible long lasting way.
Symptoms: if I may explain please 🙏🏻
Total loss of libido & s.x drive,E.D. no interest in a decade or more.
Has any other male experienced these issues etc.
These problems caused me the loss of my long term relationship as my partner told me I was useless & pathetic in that department.
Words cannot express how I feel mentally and physically etc.
For heavens sake there's more in life than S.x alone.
Would be truly helpful to hear from people who have suffered like me through no fault of my own.
It's not my fault I have fibromyalgia 😞 mine was bought on by being electrocuted to death ☠️ in a freak accident inwhich I died & I smashed my lower spine to bits in 1996 which is in operable.
Hope to hear from someone soon.
Kindest of regards
Written by
Fibroguy66
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I'm truly sorry to hear about what you're going through. Living with fibromyalgia is already a challenge, and facing issues related to sexual health and personal relationships can make it even more difficult. I'm glad you’ve shared your experience here because you’re not alone, and there are people who understand what you’re going through.Understanding the symptoms:
The medications used to manage fibromyalgia pain, such as neuromodulators or antidepressants, can have side effects that impact libido, sexual function, and mood. These issues are not uncommon and can have a significant impact on self-esteem and personal relationships.
What can you do to address this situation?
1. Speak with a specialist:
Start by discussing these symptoms with your doctor or a specialist, such as a rheumatologist or a sexual health expert. It’s important for them to know how you’re feeling so they can explore adjustments to your treatment or suggest alternative therapies.
If you’re taking specific medications, ask if there are options with fewer side effects.
2. Seek psychological support:
The emotional burden of dealing with these challenges can be overwhelming. Speaking with a therapist specialising in mental health or relationships can help you manage the emotional impact and work on strategies to improve your quality of life.
3. Consider alternative therapies:
Some men with fibromyalgia have found practices like yoga, meditation, and physiotherapy helpful for managing chronic pain and improving overall well-being.
Sexual therapy may also be a useful tool for addressing issues related to sexual function.
4. Build a support network:
Joining support groups, like this one, can help you connect with others who are going through similar experiences. Knowing that you’re not alone can bring comfort and new perspectives.
Personal reflection:
It is not your fault that you have fibromyalgia or that you are dealing with these side effects from treatment. It’s important to remind yourself that your worth as a person is not measured by just one aspect of your life, such as sexual health. You’ve been through a traumatic experience and have continued to push forward, which shows incredible strength.
What’s next?
If you need guidance on how to speak with your doctor or access support services, please don’t hesitate to ask. There will always be someone here willing to listen and help. Stay strong and keep looking for solutions because you deserve to feel better both physically and emotionally.
I think you will find that women get the same thing, these tablets completely take away your sex drive. Man or woman. But as you say there is more to a relationship than sex, sitting having a cuddle, being there for each other and understanding should play a big part. You were with the wrong person and that wasn't right of her to say that as you have an illness that affects everything in your life. Take care.
Thankyou so much for sharing your deep feelings and experiences. I too had a relationship breakdown due to the 24/7 pains. It was hard enough to do 12hours a day healthcare work but to come home to cook and clean too really destroyed me. My girlfriend of 10 years just growled at my pains, did nothing physically or mentally to help, not even a cuddle or asking if they could help. I take amitriptyline 50mg at night and cocodamol 30/500mg often. You have made me reflect on some of my experiences when with someone, I do see what your saying, so thankyou for that.😘. Pain and the exhaustion it brings does have its impact.
In regards to pregabalin (not sure about gabapentin) i knew a client who took this medication along side prescribed sildenafil (it does have a well known brand name).
Have a good look at that and follow what ftorres18 👍 has mentioned in the previous post. There may be other underlying things that the experts can properly help with.
gosh it sounds like you have had a hell of a time! I’m sorry to hear about your accident; that must have been so traumatic! Mine too was brought on by a car accident - being in pain and I think my nervous system became overwhelmed!
As others have said SEx is not everything, I can’t see anyone being in pain, feeling fatigued and completely exhausted being in the mood for it. I certainly don’t; it had certainly affected my relationship we can go months and months without it; and recently we it all came to head and we had a big row! It’s important to him, and I’ve shared what is important to me …. And we are trying to find a middle ground a bit of compromise.
It’s hard none of chose this for ourselves! I doubt anyone would want to feel like this day in day out; it’s like treading water all the time, everyday is a challenge and we get through it, just about!
I’m glad you have come on here and opened up, it’s important you don’t feel alone and isolated -we are here to support you and offer a friendly ear!
It’s hard to answer your question as we are all different.
I broke my spine in a road traffic accident over 40 years ago and was told at the time I was paralysed for life and that included not being a farther in the future.
My staunchly Catholic Mother in Law to be actively campaigned for her daughter to break up with me as she wished to be a Grandmother in the future. The knife twist in the back was that whilst I lay in a hospital bed my fiancé aborted the child she carried as she could not handle my situation. I learnt about it from her sister.
Two and a half years in a wheel chair I had intense tingles in my right leg and as some strength returned to it I could stand and get around on crutches and years later walking sticks.
I spent my life mainly alone as how do you attract a girlfriend if you know you have ED. I spent my twenties depressed and having a series of men in white coats send electric shocks through my most private parts in an effort to kick things into life. The Dr’s advice was “go out and practice”.
As luck would have it I began a relationship with a girl in my early 30’s and in time things improved but after a few years she did not want to move in with me and we parted company. I went into a period of lonelyness again and had a few disappointments along the way. ED is so difficult to deal with.
At 42 I met a girl with a 3 y/o daughter so the pressure was off and we got on well and things improved greatly. Over a few years after we married my wife was just not interested in intimacy any more and I very much found lack of use allowed the condition to return and the depression that comes with that. The need for intimacy is not just lust but emotional connection which a lot of us need. I went to the pain clinic as I felt suicidal and they understood that lack of my wife’s affection really did have a detrimental effect on me. She wanted to continue to be in the marriage with me but she was not interested in sex. I want my wife but a lack of practise has brought the ED condition back and I don’t want to go else where to ensure the continuation of sexual function.
I tried Cialis but that just gives me strong headaches. At one point a sexual health medical specialist was offered to me, they are called Sexual Surrogates, and they help someone overcome problems they have. THEY ARE NOT PROSTITUTES, but help someone with their sexual health. There is a film about their role called The Sessions.
Although embarrassing, talk with your doctor and ask for help be that with function or mental health.
The reply to the sx part I am on anatryptalyn sorry for the spelling. I have found I have no energy at all to do it but I used to enjoy it. But at the age of 62 my wife is not really bothered about it but am
Hi, I’m also on practically the same and have had same effects however spoke with GP and was prescribed Viagra which allows me to continue relationships with my wife. Both my GP and wife have been very understanding. I have both fibromyalgia and FND. I found that accepting what I have and speaking with both helped me to work through it. I hope that you will be able to work through your current issues and come out the other side
I am trying to talk about my health to my wife but she can't seem to grasp it all. As yesterday was an awful day for me but she didn't seem to be bothered. I need sx to de stress but it's just gone out of the window now
Dont know if it helps, but when I needed to go back on an anti depressant I did some research and chose to go on mitrazapine, with my drs agreement of course. I chose this AD as it was least likely to hinder libido, as this was a concern for me. So asking about alternatives to your needed meds may help on that side.Also had my testosterone levels checked, and as they were so low I was prescribed testosterone replacement gel. I am female by the way, and hormone levels were dropping like crazy due to my age, menopause, so hrt inc testosterone were affected. But a lower libido was an issue for me.
I accept as we age things alter, but if they affect us so much its worth seeking advice. And without a doubt, intimacy and affection are massively important, even if no sex is not an issue for some people.
It can take some courage to speak openly about some subjects,so your post may well be helping others too. I wish you well
I would like to tell you I am so sorry to hear your heartbreaking story and tell you also that sadly, it is not unusual. It is also not a male only problem. Females too experience loss of libido due to these drugs and a similar ED but for the clitoris. I totally understand that it is harder for a man (bad choice of words!!) as you need to be erect to enjoy and complete the act. However, it can be just as distressing for women. Your previous partner does not sound at all supportive. I imagine if the tables were turned, they would expect love care and understanding. I am lucky that my husband is incredibly supportive and realises there is more to life than sex. That doesn't mean it wouldn't be nice to be able to enjoy each other more often though so we try and do it in other ways. Have you tried other forms of intimacy that don't need the actual physical act of an erection? Coming off these meds will bring your libido back but then your pain will come back too. Maybe a pain alternative is what you need to look for if the sex is more important? Only you and a partner can answer that. Please know you're not alone. I wanted to give you a female perspective as well but I truly appreciate how soul crushing it must feel for you, especially with your partner being so cruel. You are no less of a man and as you rightly said... it is not your fault you have fibro! You didn't ask for this awful illness. Sending gentle hugs and a warm heart your way hun xx
I am sorry about your situation. I was on Gabapentin for about six months and it was good for my fibromyalgia pains but had to come out of it, because of increased libido . I am woman. could it be that , the side effects affect men deferently in a negative way as to positive way for women ? I wish I had this drug earlier because fibromyalgia destroyed my 33 years of marriage and having later in my treatment made me to be in love again but not having no man made me to come off it. But I was suicidal after I came off. The things fibromyalgia have taken from us, no words can describe it. Dignity gone because I can't even work and benefit is a reproach because of the way some people make comments about it. I am Not loosing hope though,that one day will be a day for fibromyalgia of what is doing to us. Let us keep going.
Hi, Sadly these drugs do come with side effects but of course with severe pain the need for medication is there. It's good to have opened up on this forum because we have some understanding of what a rubbish time you are having.
I agree with what the other people have written, some great advice. I can't add to that but be reassured these side effects do affect both sexes but it's easier as a female to perhaps hide the issue more.
Please take some advice regarding the medication, is there a clinic you could get a review at?
Perhaps some kind of counselling to help vent this powder keg of emotions, I'm guessing that under the fatigue and pain lies a lot of anger at the unfairness of all that has happened to you.
Please take care and keep in touch with us. We may be able to help a little bit.
Thankyou for your kind & thoughtful & understanding words.
Hopefully my pain clinic will contact me soon as I've already had 2 pain acessment appointments etc.
The trauma of everything is beyond overwhelming to say the least.
Love making or sex etc is not the issue here etc,as not interested,it's just being thrown away like trash because you don't meet that macho criteria in the said department.
I didn't ask for my illnesses etc & where did the old saying go in sickness & in health.
Feel like a cracked flat screen TV whats not worth repairing 😞 as buying a new one is a cheaper option.
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