I have read the relationship between cfs and fibromyalgia and emotional trauma and being associated with Narcissists.

[TooTiredTara]

On you tube there was a good video about the relationship between narcissistic abuse and auto immune issues and included was CFS and Fibro.

To sum it up.. being around narcissistic people and their bs.. causes us to be in fight or flight. Causing are nervous system to basically go into over drive.. and pan out. If I can find the link ill post it.

It made sense in my case. I was married to a malignant narc and my mom is a narcissist.. I guess that's why I attract them or gravitate to them.. but they literally suck the life from us..

[TooTiredTara]

I just looked on you to ube and the video I'm talking about was from 4 years ago. However, there are a lot more now on the same subject. For me personally, I have had trauma and being a daughter of a Narcissist and then Marrying one. I think there is an emotional component to this , but im not discounting VERY REAL PHYSICAL SYMPTOMS. I hate it when people imply its " in my head". No.. you cant " in your head " test results. My Dad had Chrons Disease and I think there was an emotional aspect with him. I know that stress with any auto immune disease will exacerbate the disease.

[Hazel_Angelstar Administrator FMA UK Staff]

while this may be what triggered their fibromyalgia for some people, it will not apply to everyone.

Research still points towards fibromyalgia being more central nervous system than autoimmune - and the nervous system going into overdrive is a simple but effective description (I normally say mine has gone wonky)

[desquinn Partner Volunteer FMAUK Trustee]

may be interesting to see the research source to have a read.

[Amanda_iona]

I had ME/CFS very severely for 8 years, and recovered from it by reading a book called Reverse Therapy, which followed the theory you describe. Chronic stress caused by not dealing with some issue, often relationships or work related, leading to a breakdown of the stress system.

Now, 20 years later, I have developed fibromyalgia and rediscovered the book which has given me hope that I might have a light at the end of the tunnel. The secret is discovering what problem you are not dealing with (not as easy as it sounds!) and then dealing with it. Also not easy!

Nothing to lose by giving it a try.......

[khaleeseebrown1]

I was married to a malignant narcissist for 40 years I am totally screwed up by the abuse at his treatment and my father who was a functioning alcoholic with narcissist tendency. The 2 men I my life who should have nutured me hated me so much . I commenced divorce proceedings when I couldn't stand the ill treatment following my hip surgery when he expected me to carry on regardless or go into care until I could manage alone . I had to leave the area I grew up in my home his family and his friends over the years most of my friends had been removed from my life by him the same for family it was his way or the highway and there was no help for women in my situation in the eighties no 1 understood coercive controlling behaviour , you put up and shut up . When my colleagues got police involved after he kneed me in stomach whilst pregnant with middle child in 84 the physical abuse stopped but the mental abuse started . I lost everything he kept the house I kept my nurses pension he had no pension due to not working a proper job etc . It's been hard in my fifties to start over but I will never let anyone hurt me again. I was diagnosed with fm 4 years ago but I think I had it longer my old gp didn't recognise it as an illness just kept saying its osteoarthritis causing all my symptoms.

[LisaSnow FMA UK Volunteer]

I don’t think exposure to any personality disorder alone can “cause” complex traits like fibromyalgia. However, stress in any form, being psychological or physiological, can trigger a flare of many medical and mental health disorders or worsen functions. One important self care strategy is to manage stressors by either removing them out of your life, or cope better with strategies that lessen their adverse impacts on us. It is never easy but always worth a try.

[fmlife in reply to LisaSnow]

Saw a book along the lines of this topic advertised in the suggested for row, am not sure what brought the book up, however its a shocking title

'am glad my mom died' by Jennette McCrudy the reviews paint a picture of the contents, It may surprise what happened to the lass and what suffers with. Not something want to read myself.

much prefer reading fiction, Amanda Flowers candy mysteries. can imagine eating all that candy and not feel guilty or put weight on, how could you not love the pigs antics.

[Newbiefibro]

woah! I was with a narc for to many years and thought my fibro may be the result of it .. would be great to see this! X

[Elaine200756 in reply to Newbiefibro]

I agree. Can you let us know the name of the book and the author khaleesee?Love to you and newbiefibro 💕

[fmlife]

I watched this youtube.com/watch?v=1gS7uV6...(Not working as expected?)

it appeared after a hobby cleaning up January video and while did not want to watch it, did.

The interesting thing is how the N style personality person views others as a electronic tea maker, once fulfilled the purpose never think about them until needed again.