The joys of being an admin at times.....

[desquinn]

A non fibro and not so serious moan if you would indulge me.....

We have our fair share of things to do on the forum and by and large it is without issue. We have trolls from time to time and some contentious issues as well. But normality is correcting minor swear words, taking out advertising links and advising people on privacy etc.

We have a good set of rules that have formed over time and in reaction to incidents and some of them are primary school rules i.e. johnny has ruined it for the rest of the class so now we all cannot do that... But by and large they are simple and easy to follow and don't get in the way of talking about and supporting those with fibro.

so why am i posting....... Well another admin did a simple amendment to someones post recently for a minor rule and changed the persons post. This could have been removing a link, correcting a swear word or something like that.

However, the reaction on this occasion was to suggest that the admin had been heavy handed, over zealous and petty. So they deleted all their posts and left the forum!

The admin had sent a simple note of the correction made and pointed to the existing rule and they were perfectly polite in the way they went about it.

While this is an anonymous account of a relatively recent admin action I thought it would be good to share with the community how things go from time to time. I am not trying to judge the persons actions or draw comment on them. This is just one example and it is something that we experience from time to time.

I wanted to show that even when the volunteer admins do what they are asked to by enforcing the rules the reaction can be negative and unpredictable even when you think it is a simple correction. Hopefully this gives you a bit of understanding of a part of what the admin team experience.

[Kitten-kat23]

I'm so sorry some people take things so personally. We are all human and sometimes even the most cautious of us can slip up on a bad day. I am so glad we have admins to keep an eye on us, because I for one would feel terrible if I upset someone because of a slip up.

Thank you all for your hard work and eagle eyes.

[desquinn Partner Volunteer FMAUK Trustee in reply to Kitten-kat23]

thank you. I felt the need to comment as from time to time an admin can be left with the thought of "what did I do wrong there,,,,,,,?" and like this example the answer is they did not but we can only control our own actions.

[Horsesgalore]

Well said and I think that the majority of us appreciate the important role that all of you admins play, so thank you.

[Mdaisy]

I hope members understand that we need to send a message to say we've edited and why , as Des outlined it's a reminder of the rules not a telling off!

We are all working together to moderate this community to keep it supportive and an enjoyable place to be. If we allowed any of the things outlined in the rules ie links to website selling products, we could be overrun by advertisers try to use the community for this purpose which nobody wants! This is why we allow members to mention products and even websites it is available from but no links should be added.

Being an Admin can have it difficulties ie Trolls, Scammers, Spammers etc, so sending simple messages to members about any guidelines I would hope would have a friendly reply as it's for everyone's benefit.

Please don't take things personality as we have only sent a message as a friendly reminder

Emma

[honeybug]

Hi sweet desquinn

😊🌸🌿🦋

I’m sorry that you experienced this unfortunate reaction from that former member.

You all do the very best job of watching over and guiding all of us and we are all very appreciative and sing your praises for your diligence. Having said this do not let that former member negatively affect you for you cannot please everyone. There will always be those people who refuse to accept any correction no matter how politely and lovingly given. Whenever this happens the problem is with them and no fault lies on any of you.

Know that we send all of you our heartfelt love ♥️ and so apppreciate you more than we can ever express.

Thank you all

EvaJo 😊🌸🌿🦋🙏🤗💗😘

[desquinn Partner Volunteer FMAUK Trustee in reply to honeybug]

thanks for the reply honeybug It was not me that had this particular situation although I have been through quite a few. But I thought given the reaction that it would be worth sharing the story from the trench so to speak.

[honeybug in reply to desquinn]

You’re welcome desquinn.

I’m sooo glad you did share it and although this particular incident didn’t involve you if you’re ever in this situation in the future try to remember my reply then.

Again thank you xxx

EvaJo 😊🌸🌿🦋🙏🤗💗😘

[Mdaisy]

We know that this can happen and we're used to these responses However, the post was about informing members we are all moderating this community together and these messages should be received in the manner they were sent - no need to take it personally at all

[Greenpeace]

Thanks for posting this Des.

We have a very well run forum here, giving users the support and encouragement they need, and that’s thanks to all the Admins, who do the job voluntarily, and who also suffer with Fibromyalgia, and other health conditions as well.

Unfortunately in this age we live in, people just seem to want to do battle with everyone and anything that they don’t agree with, or who disagree with them.

The Guidlines are simple and easy to comply with, and adhering to them allows the forum to run smoothly, without any unpleasant incidents.

All our Admins do a great job of keeping us safe and supporting us through difficult times, so thank you.

Take care.

GP. 😊😊

[panda60]

I cannot say how much I appreciate what admin do. I have glanced from time to time at other HU sites and see posts that wouldn't be tolerated here; very few locked and worst pictures of babies in unlocked posts!

I value my privacy so don't use any social media sites but feel safe here.

We need rules to protect others - people will email things that they wouldn't say to face to face and can be very upsetting.

Thanks again

[Mdaisy]

I know it cannot be avoided but this post is just a reminder that we are not sending these messages to 'tell people off'

[desquinn Partner Volunteer FMAUK Trustee]

Hidden this is so true and a thickening of the skin is required or acquired by anyone that admins an online forum for any length of time.

[Mdaisy in reply to desquinn]

Definitely! I think it's best to send a private message about breaches so it's a reminder between Admin & member - some forums online comment on posts in reply to the person saying not to do something. I'd rather it done this way than in front of other members which is much worse and seems like a 'telling off' in my opinion even if it isn't

[Ramjets]

I understand that when you are in pain and feeling unwell, it can make you feel more sensitive and you can take things to heart. However hopefully on reflection people will appreciate that nothing admin do is meant as a personal rebuke and are just ensuring rules are followed for the benefit of all members. People may think I'm biased, however from a personal point of view, I can testify that the admin staff on this particular forum all have the interests of the forum and its members at the heart of what they do and work hard to maintain a helpful, safe and supportive community. x

[Dinkie]

I am with you on this. I left the site a good while ago whilst some nastiness was being dealt with and am glad to say the admin team did a sterling job and continue to do so. We were debating at work why the word "sorry" doesn't seem to exist any more and why many parents do not support teachers when they attempt to discipline. Sorry state of affairs. We all slip up from time to time, we are human after all, but a simple sorry and everything is done and dusted and we hope people learn from their mistakes. Many people seem so angry all the time now.

[Lou1054]

Their loss not ours xx

[glo100]

Well my friend it's there lost hey this is a brilliant site people on here hv helped with loads of things ta I didn't no about fibro and all the side affects iv met some lovely people on here and made friends along the way keep up the good work luv glor xxx

[Crossstitch1]

Thank you for your hard work in maintaining high standards. Can't be easy for you....hopefully you've grown a thick skin!

[Mumbev60]

Awww we all have jobs to do and opinionated people should not decide to overule and abuse others.

[Mdaisy in reply to Mumbev60]

Not a job just fellow members helping out to provide a community

[Betty20]

Hi desquinn I’m very grateful that you check the site regularly, I have seen in other sites just how nasty people can be. When your feeling down for whatever reason a nasty comment can really hurt. Thank you

[cefnonn1 in reply to Betty20]

I agree with you Betty. I think a lot of us find that sometimes even the smallest change in our health can seem massive to us but laughable to others. Back earlier this year I posted about something that was bothering me and the remark I had back really upset me. Luckily the majority on this site are amazingly helpful and I for one am glad of it. Take care

[Louinpain]

I for one appriciate all the hard work the admin team do. After all it helps to keep us safe and protected on here. Unfortunately some people think rules are there to be broken and then when they are corrected they dont take it well. Please pass on my thanks and gratitude to all admin staff for all their hard work xx

[Heliboy911]

I have one simple rule when posting on a forum that is monitored for all the good reasons and best intentions It is this

"ENGAGE BRAIN BEFORE USING KEYBOARD" Always serves me well.

A "HUGE" Thank you for all you do to keep this site up and running

[khaleeseebrown1]

So sorry , this illness can make you more sensitive to comments but there's no need to take it out on admins on any site they are doing their best to make it safe for every one. Well done all of you who are admin on all the sites .