all I do is moan: Never used to be like... - Fibromyalgia Acti...

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all I do is moan

tulips123 profile image
22 Replies

Never used to be like this. My health probs have changed me into someone I don't like very much. Everything is a battle. Not just physically, practically as well. Since April, the Council Housing Officer and Community Matron (out of the goodness of her heart) have been trying to find me suitable accommodation whilst they install gas central heating. I cant stay here because I use an oxygen concentrator, which would not cope with the dirt and dust etc. + they have recently found asbestos. The Matron has now moved on, & her replacement is not expected 'til February. But this is not their remit anyway, and Community Services here are in crisis and nobody seems to be available to help. The Economy 7 is both ancient and inadequate, and not at all good for my lung condition. It needs sorting. The 'old' me would have been able to work something out, I don't have the energy now. Nothing is straightforward, which doesn't help either.

Oh c'mon Nana, it's Christmas!! Put it to bed 'til January. Sounds like the best advice for now. If anyone has been in a similar position and found an answer please let me know. G'night, sweet dreams. Tulip xx

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tulips123
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22 Replies
Lizzyear profile image
Lizzyear

I haven't been in the same housing condition, but totally get the'dont know where to start to sort things, and no energy anyway! I do hope you get something sorted, quickly. I don't think people even professionals, have any idea how stres has the most horrific reaction to us. I immediately, go very tense, which hurts me even more, then get very confused and really don't know how to sort and sitting waiting for someone to sort your destiny very stressful. It can put me to bed for days.

Good Luck, hope you get something suitable come up very soon. You could always go to CAB they are very good at putting you to the right department, they may even get someone to go with you.

tulips123 profile image
tulips123 in reply to Lizzyear

I call it 'mushy brain syndrome' lol. The trouble is, i'm housebound. Talking to people on the phone can be a tough option. I can hear the lack of interest, which upsets me and I cant think straight. I don't think anything is going to happen now before Xmas. I think I will try to speak to the housing officer in January and ask her to come to see me. It is easier to explain things face to face.

Thank you for sharing and I wish you a happy, pain manageable xmas! Tulip xx :)

TheAuthor profile image
TheAuthor

Hi tulips123

I can relate to the lack of energy and the not knowing where to start with things? It is awful isn't it? I genuinely hope that they can sort something out for you and give you all the help and support that you need?

All my hopes and dreams for you

Ken x

tulips123 profile image
tulips123 in reply to TheAuthor

Thank you Ken. Wish you a happy xmas. Tulip :) x

dawnlancaster profile image
dawnlancaster

hi tulip you poor thing don't no what to say to you so I'm sending a big hug to you. and I hope it gets sorted xx

tulips123 profile image
tulips123 in reply to dawnlancaster

I never under-estimate the power of hugs and kind words so thank you :) Tulip xx

Betty67 profile image
Betty67

How big is your housing association? the matron would have had people higher up the organisation and a person or department to help you. Ring reception and ask for their advice who you need to talk to. Or how about contacting the residences association and asking for their advice.

I use to work in Housing so there will be people who care but they do need to be told (in a calm and controlled manner).

Hope it is all sorted out soon.

tulips123 profile image
tulips123 in reply to Betty67

Thank you. I am fortunate to have a local council adapted bungalow (gold dust!!) Matron/Housing officer had no luck. I've decided to ask the H.O to visit me after xmas. Thank you for advice. xx :)

Betty67 profile image
Betty67 in reply to tulips123

But contact them now as still a week to go. gentle hugs

tulips123 profile image
tulips123 in reply to Betty67

good idea. her 1st job after xmas is me!! XX

Betty67 profile image
Betty67 in reply to tulips123

Like ZedT said gentle but often.

ZedT profile image
ZedT

Sadly, it seems all to common to have to do battle with all kinds of services to get the help you need these days. In my experience both personally and when I was acting on behalf of my dad who had Alzheimer's Disease, I found the most effective way to get that help was to politely, pleasantly and persistently myther them to death!!! I'm pretty convinced that most of my problems with health services, local authority and indeed central govt departments have been solved with this determination to be a completely irritating pain in the bum to anyone who had the misfortune to pick up the phone in answer to my call !!! :-D As it has been a 100% successful technique for me so far it is the only advice I can offer. However it. IS exhausting, one has to be doggedly focussed on the goal and the stress is massive. Therefore, with this being the worst time of year to get anything done I think you are probably wise to leave it until New Year if you are able to. Moaningon the other hand is a terribly enjoyable and stress relieving activity, very good for you and free, so I suggest that you moan away with happy abandon, because we will listen, empathise and try to help ;-) Ring CAB or Social Services after Christmas. You should have a Social worker or care coordinator sorting these issues out for you....they might even let you have a moan! Xxx

tulips123 profile image
tulips123 in reply to ZedT

That's great! I love the tips re. dealing with authorities etc. I have decided to call the Housing Officer in the new year and ask her to visit me. Love the ground rules re. satisfying moaning urges! It may sound negative but it does have positive results in that even if I cant do anything about my problem, I do feel better about it, so thanks for that too! Have a good Xmas. My youngest grandson (2 years old) has just called, without his Mum's knowledge - he seems to have found the right number on fast dial. I picked up the phone "Nana, Nana, Nana. It's Kissmas". He may be a little early but I defy anyone to feel down after that! :) Tulip xx

ZedT profile image
ZedT in reply to tulips123

Awwww, bless his cotton socks! Well, enjoy your "kissmas" and then start the new year with a fresh and determined approach Tulip. You will succeed if you don't give up. Good luck :-D xxx

tulips123 profile image
tulips123 in reply to ZedT

Thank you so much. Wishing you a great Christmas too. Tulip xx :)

nedd profile image
nedd

Oh gawd.

You have every reason to feel low.

Throwing you a virtual fluffie.

And a sprinkling of star dust. May it shine a light in a ark corner.

Keep on trucking.

tulips123 profile image
tulips123 in reply to nedd

aw thank you, that's lovely! Tulip :)

magnetta profile image
magnetta

Having lived with economy 7 heating I can completely agree it is useless!

I just wanted to send a big squishy hug. There is nothing I can say will solve your problems but you aren't alone.

You might think it is a load of rubbish but I read a really good book that you can get it emailed for free... It is called How to be happy (no moonbeams or fairy dust required).

I have been 'banging on about it' to everyone who will listen because I really believe it can help people. It certainly helped me with my outlook on life. Not saying I am never unhappy but it has helped me somewhat to deal with fibro.

Here is Author's site -17000-days.com/how-to-be-ha...

Here is link to amazon: amazon.co.uk/Happy-Fairy-Du...

Take care of yourself xx

rosewine profile image
rosewine in reply to magnetta

Thank you so much for posting that I have downloaded it. You have done me a favour as I did not realise you could download a Kindle app for use on computer and there are so many entirely free books in their library what I have dowloaded will keep me more than happy on those bad days when all I am capable of is sitting and reading.x

Shazzzy profile image
Shazzzy

Hi Tulip wht not ask the housing officer to visit you at home and explain how worried you are as this has not been resolved. I would definately move out while this is done, I had gas central heating installed last year and economy 7 removed, it was horrendous, the noise level, the constant drilling, people in and out all day long, nowhere ti sit quietly or escape. I was absolutely worn out when they finished, it took a week to complete. But, the resulting heat and constant hot water is amazing. I can bath whenever i need, which i do frequently for the pain relief. It is toasty warm in here now, previously we could use the whole kitchen as a fridge ! It will be lovely once its all done, the best,

tulips123 profile image
tulips123 in reply to Shazzzy

sounds lovely! I have decided to call Housing Officer, ask her to visit. Take it from there. :) Tulip x

dawnlancaster profile image
dawnlancaster

hi tulip 123

I hope you feeling better hugs

dawn xx

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