Well, i tried!

I thought i would try and be positive despite being awake all night, in pain and figeting like we do! I threw myself out of bed and twisted myself into my swimsuit with every intent on attending an Aqua aerobics class (as believe it or not, my body seems to like moving about in cold water?). By the time I gingerly got myself down stairs and into the car - would you believe it I couldnt remember how to operate the geers or remember how to get to the pool! It isnt just that I cant remember but when i try to - nothing's there in my memory at all - I wouldnt mind but i've been driving for 34 years and have always lived in the same area - and the pool? Still in the same place its always been. Sadly though, this isnt the first time my memory has let me down. I'm thinking sleep deprivation is the reason for this - as I use to be quite bright once (life before Fibro that is!).

I have a stage 2 Absence Review on Thursday at 2pm if I remember how to get there. I wouldnt mind but there's no disabled parking facility arranged for me and the meeting room is up stairs. Question is my Foggy friends : in that im still signed off long term sick, should I be attending a stage 2 formal hearing? Not only that I dont have anyone I can take with me so am a little anxious. Any help would be much appreicated. Hugs to all of you. Fibrofoggy14 xx

7 Replies

  • I think holding the meeting upstairs is a test of your mobility. Make it up the stairs and the conclusion is drawn there are no mobility problems. Fibro fog (cognitive impairment) really needs support at a meeting as vulnerable adult asking a charity such as Mind for help is one way of having someone with you.

  • Agree with Ian that upstairs with no parking can be a test. Afraid I have no idea what a stage 2 Absense review is so my advice may be not OK but why not phone and say the venue is no good for you, also you can't drive so what about them arranging a taxi for you. Gentle hugs.

  • Hiya Fibrofoggy14

    I agree with what Ian123 and Betty67say, that this could be a test, to see how mobile you are and if they could send a taxi to collect you on the day, would be very helpful, to you having to drive yourself there and back to your home. How Long have you been working for this company? Do you have a work colleague who could be with you on the day or your work Supervisor who surely should know something about your illness which unfortunately is not of your doing. Good Luck and a soft hug. :-)

  • Hi Fibrofoggy14

    I am so sorry to read that you are really struggling at the moment, and I genuinely hope that you start to feel better soon. I also agree with Ian123, and do not allow them to dictate that you can get up the stairs, say that you cannot!

    I have pasted you a link to a PDF from the Information Commissioner's Office about how the process works and what rights that you have, so I hope that you find this useful:


    I want to wish you all the best of luck with your review.

    All my hopes and dreams for you

    Ken x

  • Hi Ken

    Thank you very much for providing the link - I have read the policy. Fortunately I have complied where required so I'm hoping the meeting will take a more informal stance. Here's hoping anyway. Lynne x

  • Hi Lynne

    At least you have been compliant and there can be no comeback on you from that side of it? So, good luck for Thursday and I will keep my fingers crossed for you.

    Good luck

    Ken x

  • Morning Fibrofoggy,

    I'm so sorry to hear you had such an awful day and hope today will be better.

    I don't know how it works with your employer but when I was going through the whole absence review thing I had to let them know I was unable to attend due to how unwell I felt. I had a copy of the absence procedures so knew I was entitled to do it. However, I had a union rep who went in my place. Perhaps it would be helpful if you knew what your rights are?

    From an anti-discriminatory point of view they cannot insist that you climb the stairs. Could you perhaps explain you can't do that and request alternative venue.

    Take care and good luck. Lyn x

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