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when will this end ?

bigpants profile image
14 Replies

I have just had chest infection wich has been made worse since I have been

on chemo had to stop that my filling in one tooth has come out need to see

dentist who deals with cancer patients my nose has also all broke out cold

sore on lips ulcers on my tongue and to top it off all the fibro pain and depression don't know the point

living at times just my daughter keeps me going :(

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bigpants
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14 Replies

Hi, you really are going through the mill bigpants, and you seem to be getting one thing after another. My heart goes out to you at the moment with all these health issues. I don't mean to pry, but do you have someone to support you, when you are feeling down? This is a great forum and you'll always find someone on here to talk to & share your worries & concerns with.

I lived in SA for 27yrs and came back here 7yrs ago & I really miss the sun. I find that having dull grey days one after the other really gets me down. Ah well, you get used to it eventually.

Please don't think that life is pointless, that is because you are feeling mentally & physically drained just now. I'm not that good at technology, but there will be someone come on here soon & see your post & they will give you links to get help with these feelings. Your daughter must bring you a lot of joy, and she means so much to you, so hang in there for her.

I really hope that you get the support you need, and that soon you'll be feeling a good deal better.

You're in my thoughts & prayers.

Love GJ. XX

bigpants profile image
bigpants in reply to

Hi Gerryjay thanks for replying I also lived in SA my husband is South African I had 2 children born there we lived in Boksburg have been back here 13 years don't know where the time has gone I miss the life we had but that's all changed now in fact my stepdaughter said it had rained for 2 weeks !!! I mean imagine going on holiday and having rain ,yea the grey days also get to me :( my husband is homesick just now as well he has 3 daughters there from his first marriage its hard for him shame I don't have much support my oldest daughter lives in England so its hard my hubby works 12 hour shifts but hey suppose we must just go on I am ok today just pain no depression so that's a bonus hate feeling so down then you want to just die even though you don't really if that makes sense :) back at hospital Friday so will see when I am back on chemo had to stop because chest infection .

Thanks prayers help

Linda x

Hello Bigpants . I am sorry that i have no advice I can give you. But would like to send you lots of hugs suexxxx

TheAuthor profile image
TheAuthor

Hi bigpants

I am so sorry to read that you are having all of these problems, and I genuinely hope that you can find some resolution and relief to all of these issues.

I cannot begin to imagine what you are going through, but you have your daughters, as you have already said. I hope that you can continue to draw strength from their love for you and yours for them.

Please take care and please keep us up to date with how you are getting on?

All my hopes and dreams for you

Ken x

Cookie72 profile image
Cookie72

Morning big pants, so sorry to hear you are going thru a bad time, plzzz don't give up you have a lovely daughter to hang on for, do come on here a talk to us. Often, there is always someone here to listen, if I'm not being too rude what is the chemo for, what type of cancer, you don't have to answer that if you don't want to, but sometimes it helps to talk about these things, you are most welcome to pm me if you prefer, please don't think me rude, ....my thoughts are. With you,.....keep us in touch as to how you are getting on....sending you a huge gentle hug..and a large handful of sunshine.....Dee xx

bigpants profile image
bigpants in reply toCookie72

Hi Dee thanks for taking the time to reply it called multiple Myeloma think its spelt right lol its blood cancer of the bone marrow I will need transplant were they use my own bone marrow you in hospital for 3/4 weeks bit hard as my youngest child who is 18 has Down Syndrome so its getting help with her as my husband works shifts but will cross that bridge when I get there still 1 more lot chemo should have started last weekend but chest infection put stop to that thanks for the sunshine lol it came through :) take care Linda xxx

denvajade profile image
denvajade in reply tobigpants

Hi bigpants I am sorry to read that you are having a rough time at the moment and that you have myeloma, I have been told I have the indicators of myeloma,i have tests every 3months to track it, I had all my bones xrayed for lesions but none were found, is this how you started? wishing you well and please take great care of yourself. Trish

Good morning Bigpants, I hope you are feeling better today. I am sorry you are so ill at the moment, but as the previous posts say, no-one can understand what you are going through and I am sure we all sympathise with you and are willing to listen.

My own mother suffered from cancer and I helped her get through both her chemo and recovery. There were days when she didn't think she had any fight left in her, but she did, she said you just have to dig deep and think of all the things you have to live for. Her family was her main one. No-one wants to be ill and pain has a great way of pulling you down, pain and the after effects of chemo not pleasant at all. Lean on your daughter, you have been there for her and she will only be too glad to be there for you. That I am sure on, I would have done anything for my mum to make her better. As I couldn't do that I made it my goal to at least make her smile, or listen when she needed to vent and cried with her. She has recovered, thankfully.

Please lean on the people using this site, they are a very helpful and caring set of people and they use humour as a wonderful distraction. If you think I can be of any help, you can PM any time and I will do my very best. I will warn you though, I have been told that I can have a sarcastic sense of humour sometimes :p but you would be welcome to try it.

All my best wishes and hopes go to you...Susan :)

bigpants profile image
bigpants

Thanks Susan glad your mum has recovered and had you by her side my oldest daughter lives in England I am in Scotland so its not easy my youngest is 18 she has Down Syndrome its really her that keeps me going :) even when she is throwing a strop lol and that's most the time she just likes to sit on her tablet all the time try getting her off is a nightmare !! but wouldn't part with her thanks for replying will us the site more often .

Linda :)

Gramma profile image
Gramma

It will end, honestly. I went through Chemo and felt so ill I didn't know which way was up! I didn't have skin problems but lost some teeth and a couple of toe nails. As you can imagine, I do know what you're going through. I know it's easier said than done but try and stay positive. X.

fenbadger profile image
fenbadger

Oh, bless you bigpants. Chemo is horrid as if the rest wasn't bad enough. It attacks the immune system while it does its work - mixed blessing. I had a friend with breast cancer and it was visible almost daily. I think you're getting stem cell treatment which is great.

You may get a reply form someone else who has downs in the family. You're so strong to keep going like this. Well done.

I'm sorry no one can answer the top question of exactly when but I think times will get better. You don't say what you're on for fibro and depression - you don't have to. I can think of a couple of things that will do for both.

All I can offer is gentle hugs and when to sun comes out tomorrow I'll send you some spare sunshine.

bigpants profile image
bigpants

Thanks Fenbadger for replying I am on morphine plus Gabapentin some other painkillers plus Diazepam just 2mg only take when I need I am also on antidepressant as well I have servidol wich is also morphine to take inbetween ,Gramma hope your cancer is cured I have been lucky and got tablet form so thy arent as bad as the drip I would hate to get that lol I don't do sick very well thanks to all who took the time to reply to me here's hoping the sun shines tomorrow least you feel bit better xx

agtf1 profile image
agtf1

Hi bigpants, so sorry to hear all you are going through. I just wanted to say that, as you can see, there are lots of people on here who care & can offer you emotional support. You are obviously very strong and courageous to get this far, stay strong and keep fighting & know that there are people ready to listen & offer moral support. Gentle hugs x

agtf1 profile image
agtf1 in reply toagtf1

P.s. hope the sunshine came out for you x

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