I need to get something out of my system before I start to stew over and over.
It should have been my husband's 53rd birthday last Monday. He died almost 5 years ago from a heart attack. Today would have been our 18th wedding anniversary. It's also the first time I've been at home by myself for years, both my wonderful (yes I'm biased and yes they wind me up something awful at times but I love them to bits) children are away on a sleepover with friends. I was doing ok, until I got an e-mail from my mother-in-law...
The e-mail was a poem (I've really enjoyed the poems on unlocked tonight) about a woman in a car crash who couldn't find her twin boys, (We lost our twin boys 14 years ago.) they were found safe in a police car and had been put there by their dead dad's angel.
It doesn't help that she's coming to visit when it's the anniversary of my husband's death next month. Everything has to be a drama, when I like to quietly acknowledge and protect my kids. Our families could not be more opposite. I know she means well and wouldn't want to upset me.
I'm sorry, it's really stupid, but it triggered so many memories. I usually bottle everything up and thought if I write this down it will hopefully stop me sliding downhill.