I thought I will add extra post, because I think it is so important. Please who ever is pregnant with IVF please just tell your midwife give you extra scan,making sure your blood flow to placenta and cord will be checking several times during the pregnancy, now I wouldn't wait until the end of pregnancy. Sometimes measuring with tape it's not enough.Now with the time I would say take my baby out earlier don't wait until 40 weeks if your baby if is healthy. I had stillbirth in 38 weeks. Having still birth with IVF is 4 times higher than in normal pregnancy but noone is talking about that and noone is even think that because of IVF maybe they should treat your pregnancy better, be more careful. Have extra care. Preeclampsia or group strep B that is really common please check the symptoms and do some test for this bacteria.
I was absolutely blind. My pregnancy was perfect. Nothing wrong. I wish they could be more aware when they have parents with first baby from IVF.
But you trusting them that will be ok, and if they said it's normal pregnancy so you started believing them
Well not really.
I love you all and I know how this journey is hard for everyone
How much we have to do to have our little one. Loosing your baby on every single stage especially in this circumstances is absolutely cruel and heartbreaking. Now instead of carrying my little one I'm going to baby garden with bunch of flowers for my baby .Its absolutely mind-blowing.
I wish no-one could fell that way.
Thank you all for reading.
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Honey328
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Ps. If you think that your baby has hiccups too much at the end of pregnancy, like more than 3 or 4 times per day or last more than 15 min during the day go to hospital and check this, because it can be problem with the cord, I know it sounds silly, but just be aware nothing is for sure until you gonna hold your baby in your arms. If you think your baby is too active moving in different hours than normal don't even think just , go quickly to hospital and check this .
I feel very lucky that I have been told I will have 2 weekly scans from 32 weeks and will be induced early. It’s been stressed to me at every appointment recently that if I feel anything maybe isn’t right, anything feels different, or I’m worried about anything to call the hospital. Don’t hesitate, don’t wait till morning.
Thankyou for sharing your advice and I’m so sorry to read about your loss. X
I'm really happy for you. Fingers crossed everything will be ok. The best thing is when I was pregnant we decided not to use the last embrió becuase was poor quality and in the future you would like to avoid miscarriage. Now I wouldn't never known if I did good or not. I didn't expected thats gonna be my final.
I will have a scan every 2 weeks from 32 weeks - growth scans to monitor what’s going on. This is due to me being under the consultant rather than midwife lead for a few reasons, one of them age.
Yes, but he said my main contact will be my midwife... he only said that because of the IVF and me being over 40 they offer me a scan t 32 and 36 weeks but thats it... Can I ask how old are you? X
absolutely devastated for you. I am so so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and wishing there words to worthy enough to comfort you at this awful time
Hi, so so sorry for your loss, absolutely heartbraking 💔
Could you share where you found the statistic that stillbirth is 4xmore likely in an IVF pregnancy? Defitily something that needs to be talked about more, and more monitoring needed.
There is a lot of research saying it's more common to have a stillbirth than in normal natural pregnancy. It's still really low but still higher than conceived naturally. During my 9 months pregnant in UK I would say or maybe I'm wrong but they don't really checking your placenta or your blood flow to placenta or cord if your baby is ok only if there is some concerns. Obviously tragedy had happened and after this I started paying more attention. They not really telling you what can happen wrong, better to not mention, just in case to not stress you, which I understand but later on you are completely blind and you thinking nothing can happen all is good.
Thank you for sharing this important message, even in the midst of your grief. Your strength in trying to protect others from this pain is incredible. Sending you so much love and comfort. x
I am so sorry to hear of your heartbreaking loss - sending so much love & strength.
I had low Papp-a in my pregnancy so they did an umbilical doppler at every scan from 28 wks - I also paid for a private group b strep test, but neither are tested routinely.
There are lots of variables to worry about in pregnancy & I do agree some should be spoken about more x
That is so good they used extra umbilical Doppler. I had two scans more one for 1 HR checking my babys heart because on 20 weeks scan he was moving too much and they couldn't check it properly so they sent me for another scan where they could focus on only on his heart ,and was perfect all good. And his heartbeat stopped eventually anyway. Sometimes I think if it has to happen will happen no matter what.
I didn't respond to your previous post but I have been thinking of you everyday since I read it. I'm currently in my 3rd trimester and, because of your experience, I'm going to push for bi-weekly scans after 32 weeks. I'm usually quite hesitant contacting the hospital but, after reading your post, I rang up and had him checked over the other day. I've also discussed with my partner about being induced early.
I'm so sorry about your loss. You're absolutely right, we go through so much and then to lose a baby, it's just horrific. I really hope your story helps to save other babies and mothers from heartache.
Thinking of you and your little angel. Look after yourself X
I red your post and yes if someone would tell me this I would do the same . Shame I was so naive to believe it's gonna be ok and I didn't push them at least to check my blood flow my placenta. I'm waiting for results but I'm not gonna be surprised if I had placenta abruption or something wrong woth my blood flow. I don't think so they have ever checked this. Nonstress test really important. One you suppose to have after 29 weeks. I only had becuase one day I went to hospital at night, because I couldn't feel movements it was around 22 weeks but baby was in different positions. Kind of you melted my heart saying you gonna ask about another scan . The worst part that this baby won't come back. I'm gonna live with this pain until the rest of my days .Missing so much. Next time I'm gonna wait until 36 weeks and that it. no longer. I had so beautiful healthy boy 53 cm, 3.2 kg ready to go outside. And now I am holding him in my heart instead of my arms.
I'm very sorry to read this. If I ever reach that point I will be vigilant because of your warning. Thank you for sharing this. Sending lots of love xxxxxx
I am so, so sorry to hear you have had to go through this.
Thank you for highlighting all this information here, it is appreciated.
I hope you are able to be really kind and gentle with yourself. It is entirely different, I know, but we had multiple miscarriages and I so know that feeling of going over everything and questioning everything, to see if you missed something which could've led to a different outcome. It's a normal part of grieving and being a human, of course, but please do extend kindness to yourself in it. The truth is, if you had the information or could've done anything different, of course you would've.
I don't know where you are or what the provision is like in your area, but lots of NHS Trusts do now have a counselling service specially to support people after pregnancy loss, in addition to charities such as SANDs, etc. If you've not already been directed to these services, it might be worth asking your GP or midwife, as they can be really helpful.
There's also an online community called Baby Loss Hour which are active across social media (mainly Instagram) and might also be helpful.
Again, I'm so sorry you have to even think about any of this, let alone live through it, and I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your beautiful son. xx
Hello and thank you yes during this 2 months I red lots of stories . I have a lots of support, bereavement midwives. My husband is my biggest support. Sands charity I red about them . Literally I got through everything.When you are on maternity without the child it's kind of like since fiction. Is that real, it that really happened. I hope we gonna have a live baby and noone is gonna lose the faith it will happen. Thank you.
Thank you very much for sharing this! Despite your pain you are still thinking of others, you are a truly wonderful person 💕, and I am sooo sorry for your loss... Just reading your post broke my heart... 😓Sending you lots and lots of love! 💕
That's ok. This is the life you can always plan , but noone said that plan is gonna work is correct, because maybe that time something didn't mean to be for you not yet .I'm happy I could meet my baby, happy caring my sunshine for 9 months, happy giving him just pure love. All that moments which I spent with my Baba will stay forever in my heart. I'm really grateful for being his "Mummy".
I understand... I was always nervous about what if something goes wrong, specially with my early loss 3 years ago, and naturally my mind said dont get too excited but this time I just decided no matter what happens I just want to enjoy every moment, I am 20 weeks now, so long way to go but celebrating every day with my baby because you never know what tomorrow brings... I truly admire your stength, you are a wonderful human being... 💕
I look forward to hear that your pregnancy went smoothly and your little one is in mums arms unforgettable feeling!. Your baby already has chosen you to being his mummy. Celebrate every moment and have a such a good pregnancy. Lots of positive energy.
Thank you very much for your kind word, it means a lot to me... 💕Can please just ask that you mentioned in your post to have more scans, did you mean 2 scans a week or 1 scan in every 2 weeks?
If I were you and to new myself I would say I would do more scans not only 12 weeks and 20 weeks it's not enough definitely not for me.It's depends from you but definitely I would push have a more scans especially when you are on the last stage of pregnancy to making sure that they check everything your blood flow you placenta. That everything is working.
Well I already had like 5 scans so I am pretty much the 'I want to know everything is going well' lady... Was just wondering how many scans is too much or too less... As I am obsessed with scans...
Shame I wasn't obsessed and I totally trust that's it's gonna be fine we don't need more but finally I had two extra scan one to check baby's heart and one to check when I couldn't feel his movements bit that time was ok I didn't have any more scans 22 weeks up.
Non stress test it's really important make sure you will have that one with next couple of weeks especially on third trimester
Literally they checking you baby's heart rate before birth. it's takes maybe 30 min. They use kind of two elastic tape on your belly and when baby is moving you have to click the botton. They monitoring your babys heart for 30 min
They did this for me when I was in 22 weeks because I didn't feel movements in hospital. They should do this between 38-42 weeks but come on 42 weeks I hope noone is gonna wait until 42 because it's too risky for the child and your placenta.You can always ask them to do this.
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