Moving forward after mmc

[Runner90]

Hi, about a month ago I went to a scan and found out our baby had stopped growing and had no heartbeat. I had a d&c at what should have been 8.5 weeks pregnant almost 3 weeks ago.

We have an appointment in a couple of weeks and then plan on doing a frozen transfer as soon as I get my period back.

I’m just wondering if anyone has any advice on anything we can do to help be more successful in the future? I’ve now had two full rounds of ivf and gotten pregnant twice, (I have a wonderful daughter from the first round) and our dr says we should consider that successful and this is just an unfortunate case of 1 in 3, but nothing about our recent round feels successful, it feels like I’ve wasted 3 months of my life and all I’ve got to show for it is constant sadness.

I’ve started seeing a naturopath and organised some blood test (vit d, thyroid etc)

Is there anything else I can do?

[Hidden]

Hi Runner90.

First of all congratulations on your first pregnancy. That is absolutely amazing that you got pregnant on your first round of ivf. Not many people manage that. I understand that means that whilst knowing in your head that it may not happen again, your heart must have been soaring when you got your second bfp again after 1 round. Amazing. And perhaps even more crushing then when you had your news and procedure not long ago. I am so so sorry you have had to go through this. It is an awful time and nothing can really comfort you. Personally, whenever an ivf round failed I found having my next plan in place helped immensely. The thrombophilia panel of testing - sounds like you are doing - really is the only one to double check. Although with any of these tests you will have to wait a while before you test due to the miscarriage.

I was advised at one time that a normal couple with no fertility issues who try at the exact time they should each month only has a one in 3 chance of becoming pregnant. So with ivf, the best outcome to expect would be 1 in 3. Which means there may be nothing wrong at all and you were really just unlucky.

The only other thing I can think of is to ask what blood type you and your husband are? If you are one type and he another then you may want to consider asking about that with your clinic too.

Good luck for your next round. Allow yourself some time to grieve for this and hopefully you will have success again soon xx

[Runner90 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. No one told me I should wit to do the tests because of the miscarriage, so I had them today which is 2.5 weeks since the d&c, is that too soon? What’s the reason for waiting?

I assume my hcg levels are back at zero but I haven’t checked but I imagine I’ll have to have more bloods and probably scans to do a frozen round anyway.

My husband and I do have different blood, I didn’t need an anti d shot with my first pregnancy but I had one this time. Does our blood types make a difference?

[Hidden in reply to Runner90]

If you had the anti-d you should be fine and I expect the clinic will have checked to see that it worked. And perhaps with d&c you don't need to wait as long as with medical management. Who did you get the tests through? Xx

[Runner90 in reply to Hidden]

I did them through a blood collection place then they get sent to my GP so we can talk about them, and I’ll talk about them with the naturopath then I’ll take them to the appointment with our FS and talk about them again. So much talking haha. My clinic didn’t ask me to do any of the tests, I saw the naturopath who asked for some, and then my GP added to them. I don’t think in my initial screening/pregnancy with the clinic they checked for vitamin d and I don’t know if they checked thyroid because no one ever talked to me about it. So I’d it turns out something simple like that is wrong I’ll feel really let down by the clinic.

I know it probably seems like I’m over reacting because lots of people have miscarriages and I’ve been fortunate to get pregnant twice but my first took 3 years of trying and surgery before we even got to ivf and again this pregnancy we started so much alter than we wanted because of circumstances out of our control and I just feel like time is slipping away and I’m o my getting older and less likely to get pregnant.

[Hidden in reply to Runner90]

I think, despite what you have been through, your chances are really good. Fingers crossed for your next round xx