IVF Donor Mum

[LisaBeatrix1980]

Hi, I am new here and I am almost a week into nafarelin as part of my IVF treatment, after which i'll also be on Gonal F, to have a donor child. I am 39 years old who separated from my partner last year, with low AMH levels and trying for a child on my own. It's been a very overwhelming journey to this point, and I know that the physical part is going to be just as tough. I just wanted to say hi, and if anyone has any advice, guidance or experience with going through this process alone I would really appreciate it.

I have a really supportive family and set of friends, and am lucky in lots of ways, and I am trying to remain positive but of course going through this entire process, including the invasive treatment before even getting to the egg retrieval stage can sometimes seem a very big mountain.

Wishing all those going through IVF at the moment all the best luck in the world

[alittlelife]

Hi Lisa, welcome to the group. I have always found everyone on here so helpful and almost like a safe space. No matter how odd the ivf question someone is usually able to help! I hope everything is feeling ok so far. I was on Gonal F too and didn’t experience any bad side affects so I hope it won’t be too bad for you either. It’s sounds like you have already been through so much but hang in there - the doctors can do so much even if it takes a little bit of time to find the best approach for you.

My main piece of advice would just be to take each step at a time and expect the unexpected. I have found that there can be days that feel like massive set backs only to be followed by good days too that usually help to frame the setback differently.

On a practical note a piece of chocolate after each jab def helped me oh and I used ice before doing the injection. It made a big difference.

Fingers crossed for you over the next few weeks. Once you start having scans it may feel a bit more exciting and take from some of the hurdles along the way.

Xxx

[LisaBeatrix1980 in reply to alittlelife]

Thank you and I really appreciate the words of encouragement. A week into strangely now, I’ve had a headache for 2 days but just started my withdrawal bleed so Hurdle one check I guess! I’m hoping the headache eases up once it’s finished. X

[Charliebenj]

Hi

I’m also 39 and my OH was removed from the whole process as he couldn’t cope emotionally and he just provided the sperm. I went through ivf with minimal support from anyone, but if I would of have a good support network then I think that is gold and you sure may want their support as it can feel like a long and lonely road.

I only found this forum while in my TWW but this group is also a great help. Share every thought concern, everyone here is willing to help/listen.

My advice would be try to take things a day at a time and just focus on the upcoming milestone. This is a very unpredictable journey so try not to overthink and live in the moment.

All the best with it, you can do this.

X

[LisaBeatrix1980 in reply to Charliebenj]

Thank you and I’m so sorry you had to go it alone, I hope everything has gone well for you?

Yes right now it feels like SUCH a long road, and because I’m starting to feel a little under the weather on syranel and with my bleed I guess at times I can lean toward it’s still only being week 1 rather than ‘Yes, week one down!’.

Thank you for the words of encouragement x

[Hidden]

Hey welcome, like the others have said this forum is a god send.

My best advice is to think of IVF like a hurdle race, you have to get over each one, celebrate the positives and don't be put off by any negatives that crop up. As others have said - things change almost daily and so often there is an element of luck to the outcome. I think its fantastic you have a great support network - we haven't really told anyone about IVF and my partner is a 'practical' type so basically zero support! I have found it quite a lonely experience and struggled that no one knows what I am going through .. so this forum is a great place to share emotions and experience.

Oh and at 39 you are a spring chicken! I am 43 next month!

Masses of luck! xx

[LisaBeatrix1980 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, for the replies to just this thread I already feel as though I have some companions just in the same headspace as me which is more than I had before.

I think this will be a great support network for me and hopefully I can also help anyone that maybe experiencing the need for some support x

[CLDxxx]

Hi Lisa,

Welcome ☺️ just wanted to wish you lots of luck!

I’m also doing this via sperm donor to be a single mum. I’m always here if you have any questions or concerns 😘xxx

[LisaBeatrix1980 in reply to CLDxxx]

Thank you so much! I probably have so many hahaha. Do you mind me asking how far you are into the journey? xx

[CLDxxx]

Haha we learn as we go that's for sure! I had my first frozen transfer a couple of weeks ago which was negative unfortunately. I have a review next week and hoping to go straight in to another one as I'm doing a natural transfer.

How are you feeling? xxx

[LisaBeatrix1980 in reply to CLDxxx]

I'm sorry to hear that but you sound optimistic and that goes a long way, so I am hoping for the best for you, make sure you let me know how you get on.

I won't lie, I am not sure what's going on, whether it's me, the medication, the situation, but this week I am feeling pretty low, had some spontaneous crying, and have been making irrational decisions haha. Strated to doubt myself a bit, whether I am stable enough right now to be doing this alone. xx

[CLDxxx in reply to LisaBeatrix1980]

Thank you 🙏🏼

Ahh I get you! It’ll be the meds and honestly I have felt completely useless at times - even without meds and I’ve wondered how I can do this when I can’t do simple, everyday things!

But we totally can! Everyone struggles whatever their situation is and I believe going through this now is the toughest part of all. I know you have a lot of support but it’s nice to talk to people going through it so remember you’re not alone & us on here understand more than anyone. Xx

Have you read the book ‘Going Solo’ by Genevieve Roberts? It really helped me when I started this xxx