Round 4 - what a palava... And what to do next??

[magda22]

Long ramble alert! I've just had an intense few days in ivf world, and now have a tricky decision to make.

I was hoping to start my round 4 in September, but my period didn't come. I just waited and waited, it got to 7 weeks and I had half given up I was so tired with the emotional and logistical limbo (keeping employers on hold as best I could incase I suddenly had to start treatment). During this time there was a couple of days I was frequently experiencing what I can only describe as hot flushes, and I started to wonder if I had slipped into a more menopausal state, even though I'm 38. So I booked a blood test with my clinic to see what was going on.

I got up early on Friday to travel and enroute my period arrived! No pms warnings first, just unannounced. So I told my clinic and came in the next day for blood test and scan.

The baseline scan revealed 3 follicles, which is actually good for me. I've often had just 1 or 2 follicles present. There was also a small cyst they said might need to drain, if it was releasing hormones, and to be ready for that.

The next day I get a call saying the cyst is OK but my oestradiol levels are too high to start treatment, to come back the next day and see if they dropped.

Today they said they haven't dropped, they've gone up a bit, indicating that my body has already selected a dominant follicle and short protocol treatment would not be suitable. They could however offer me a natural cycle.

This is annoying. I really wanted to do a full stim cycle to see how my body reacts and if I can get a few more follicles.

So I have a day or two to think about it and decide if I want to carry on with another natural cycle - ive already done 3, with 2 very disappointing results - or come back in the future and hope my hormones are more suited to a full stim cycle. In June and July my hormones were suitable levels for the flare / short protocol. They say every month is different and there is no real rhyme or reason to it.

Right now I'm raring to go. Because of work/life commitments I won't be able to do treatment in Nov or Dec. There is a pocket of time in Jan when I might be able to do it, but that is if my period falls in the right time, because I'm abroad for work in Feb and March. So I'm wondering if I just go for it now, not wanting to put it off further, plus the possibly encouraging 3 follicles. But I'm also aware I'm kind of exhausted by the intensity of recent events and from the start I had really wanted to do full stim to do something different from previous rounds.

I asked if menopause is looming for me (a doctor has told me I will probably have it early) and they said my LH levels are not all that high.

Trying to talk to friends or family about this totally boggles their minds (can't blame them really) so I would so value comments/ideas/advice from people who get this bonkers journey. Things are never simple!

Much love to you all x

[Hidden]

That's so hard. After a cycle I had which was abandoned before egg collection I had a 70odd day cycle along with hit flushes etc. I too thought oh sh** all these drugs have done for me and I have ruined everything. But it was just the drugs mucked up my cycle so my hormones went haywire. It took a long time for my body to recover. My next cycle after that was 54 days, then 40odd.

Hopefully you will know in yourself what you would like to do. Wishing you all the best xxx

[magda22 in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Camillage, that's interesting you had a long cycles with hot flushes too. It was a bit nuts.

Yes I will go with my gut feeling in the end. I'd love it if something could be straightforward and predictable for once on this journey, but what can you do

Xx

[genten]

Oh! This a right palava for you. Lots to think about.

This is tricky and I suppose you know what you would prefer deep down but your work commitments are getting in your way.

I think if I was in the same position with trying natural cycles in the past, I would be inclined to wait until January and try full stim cycle but that's just my opinion . On the other hand your follicles are there now waiting and as we know, it really does take one.

Good luck whatever you decide. Xxx

[magda22 in reply to genten]

Thank you, you're right - what I would love is to come back next month and hope for full stimm, but as you say, work commitments are getting in the way. If treatment didn't fit in January I'd be looking at April for my next go, which is 6 months away! That doesn't feel very wise...lll mull it all over. Xx

[Orla9298]

Hey, I think, if it were me, having had poor cycles, I would skip the cycle start for a more optimal cycle. The modified natural cycle I did where i had a very dominant lead follicle early on was my worst. You never know, your next period might be late or early if the last one was irregular, so it might be that timing does allow November or December after all? Just my thoughts sorry. You will know from your internal reaction to people’s advice as to what your gut feeling is (eg when I asked people if I should transfer 2 or 3 embryos, and lots of people said 2, it confirmed to me that deep down I wanted to go ahead with 3 anyway!).

I hope between us all on here we can help you decide xxx

[magda22 in reply to Orla9298]

Thanks Orla! Yea that's really helpful, it does feel so crap to get a poor result on a cycle and if another nm cycle went that way I might kick myself. I actually started a full stimm in July and I cancelled it after a few days because there was only 1 follicle and I believed it coukd be better. I'll get known at the clinic as the woman who always cancels - ha.

I don't know how long I could go on holding out for ideal/better conditions.

You're spot on about internal reactions - I'm listening out! Thanks so much xx

[Lizzielizzielizzie]

I don’t know what you should do this month but it definitely sounds like if you want to do a stims round then you should talk to your clinic about doing long protocol with down regulation. My clinic does this as standard with all ages. Then your natural hormone levels won’t come into it.

[magda22 in reply to Lizzielizzielizzie]

Thanks Lizzie I'll look into it xx

[magda22]

Thanks you lovely ladies who replied. A little update - my clinic has advised best to cancel this round all together as hormone levels suggest I wouldn't respond well to any treatment, the cyst is wreaking havoc, so I'm leaving it for now. I'm going to back off and not worry about it and see how things go in the future months. If it's not meant, it's not meant and you can't force this stuff - that's what I'm really learning! Love to all you warriors...

[Cinderella5 in reply to magda22]

Sorry I missed your original post! Its sounds like you've had the decision taken out of your hands but it sounds like its the right thing to do for now. You have a very good attitude there, you're right....there is so much out of our hands sometimes! Hope you're ok!xx

[magda22 in reply to Cinderella5]

Yes, taken out of my hands, which is a relief in a way. I am OK right now... might have a break down next week, who knows... But right now feel OK and like getting on with things. Past 2 months of prepping, waiting and wondering and not knowing have been exhausting. Thanks for the message 😘