Fertility Network UK
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Dashed hopes and round 4 🙏🏻🙄

Yesterday was my Tommy’s appointment at Birmingham. To be honest we really are none the wiser. Everyone was lovely (unlike the Doctor from the miscarriage clinic at my local hospital). I took all of my investigations, treatments and results with me. Went through all of my medical history. Notes were made. Basically the only thing they can test me for at the Birmingham centre that I haven’t already been tested for, is whether the antibodies are high against my thyroid. This is not a thyroid check (I’ve had those and they’re normal) this is an antibody/thyroid check. If the antibodies are high then they can prescribe something for it. So I had two lots of bloods taken. As for nk tests they are only done in Coventry and would cost around £500. Our clinic offers nk testing at around the same price anyway so...

We saw a nurse after talking to the doctor who basically suggested that there’s no reason we shouldn’t go ahead and just try again. If I should achieve another pregnancy then there’s actually many more things they can do for me, especially offer me (hopefully) peace of mind with regular scans (weekly if I’d like them) and put me into reserarch trials aimed at preventing miscarriages. So with all this in mind I rang my clinic and booked an endo scratch. It will be tomorrow! Freaking out a bit because my second scratch was horrendous. Just hoping it’s more like my first one. So transfer of next fet will be next month. I will opt for a natural modified fet again and then all I can do is hope with everything that I have, that this time it works! I’m not really nervous, not excited, nothing. Just going through the motions. I am tired of putting my life on hold. I’m thinking “Let’s just get this over and done with.”

I’d had so much hope that Tommy’s would be able to offer some miraculous answers as to why I’ve now lost three babies but it boils down to this, they don’t know and probably never will xx

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Sorry to hear that you you couldnt get more definitive information, sadly I think this is the case for a lot of women with recurrent miscarriage. However on a brighter note it does sound like you will be more supported in future pregnancy which is great and that you can finally move forward again! Wishing you all the best for tomorrow, I hope your scratch isnt as bad as the last one!xx

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So glad Tommy’s were more understanding but sorry they weren’t able to offer more answers. Doesn’t seem like anyone will ever be able to answer why we suffer this heartache.

Glad you feel able to start your next cycle, I think sadly it does become a case of going through the motions. Good luck for your scratch and fingers crossed no.4 brings you your rainbow, hold on to the fact that you’ll be a lot more supported if it does xx

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So sorry you didn't get more answers at tommys.

At my first clinic they said my thyroid anti bodies where high( i do have under active thyroid) they put me on steriods when I started stims. The 2nd clinic totally pooh poohed anything to do with thyroid anti body's and I only ever got BFN at 2nd clinic, it makes you wonder how they all differ in opinions , but tommys are the experts.

It does sound like they will good care of you there 😊. Fingers crossed it works for you this time x

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That’s really interesting.. 🤔 thanks for the reply. I’m definitely going to mention it to my clinic. I doubt I’ll have had the results before transfer but if there’s an issue then hopefully I can still get something in time xx

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well done on being so proactive & cracking on with your scratch tomorrow. this journey is one hell of an endurance test - we just have to keep going!

really hope this is your time. sending all the positive vibes in the world ✨💕✨💕✨💕✨

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Oh bless you what a nightmare. I have had all my bloods as well and there all normal!! I having my first ending scratch soon....is it awful? Any tips?? Why was yours so bad?? I have got some drugs to take before now as I want to be mildly drugged up! My go was reluctant but did it.

Good luck for your next round!! Let’s hope 2018 is our year and many others on here too xxx

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The first one wasn’t awful really, it did hurt but it was SOooooo quick! The second one hurt like hell. I wasn’t expecting it to hurt so much lol. They seem to have issues passing through my cervix on the second one, never had that issue before but once they were through it still hurt. Everything cramped up! It was so intense that I felt feint afterwards and then I was sick. I was mortified by my reaction lol. So tomorrow morning I'm collecting a prescription from my gp for a muscle relaxant, just in case.... They tell you to take paracetamol an hour before but it didn’t touch my last scratch sadly. I’m hoping that my third one’s as easy as my first! 🤞

When’s yours? xx

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Oh my god that sounds horrific!! paracetamol won’t touch hence I have a very strong drug to take. I have scan Wednesday then I guess a few weeks time as doing fresh cycle and long protocol. Good luck to you xx

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Thank you and good luck to you too xx

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Hi lovely lady! Know there was a lot of expectation around yesterday and I am sorry that there were no definitive answers. I am pleased though that you found them supportive and that they are talking in terms of moving things forward and another try soon.

All the very best with the endo scratch and for absolutely EVERYTHING that comes after that. I really hope that there is something worthwhile and beautiful for you at the end of this very long journey xx

"Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die,

Life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly" Langston Hughes

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Lovely words 😊

Long time no speak.. How are you?? xx

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I have been a bit off radar for a while! I am fine thanks and just over the 36 week mark. All seems well with the baby, but he is not growing at quite the rate that they would like, so it's another scan on Tuesday and I have been told I need to be prepared - he MAY have to make an early appearance!! (C-Section currently booked for 39+1) Am I prepared? Well no...the nursery isn't even ready yet, but what will be, will be. Thanks for asking.

I am keeping everything crossed...please keep us informed. I know every person on here is rooting for you xx

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OMG so exciting for you! I can’t wait to see a picture of your little poppet! If you don’t want to put one on here then please WhatsApp me one 😊 And gooooddd luck! 😊😊 xx

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Thanks so much hun xx

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Hi vicky

Depending on your lab your antibodies will Need To be over a threshold, in leeds in my lab to be classed as hashimotos, it had to be above 300 level which it wasn't but they still started me on hormone replacement, and once I was stable, got pregnant and stayed pregnant. I hope in a way this is the case for you, as it's an easy fix. I'm sorry the rest of it was disappointing for you. All. The best ❤️😘❤️

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Thanks misswinky, that’s all really interesting. I didn’t even know it was a thing lol. Hoping to not only get pregnant but stay pregnant this time too! 🙏🏻 xx

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Sorry to hear that you didn’t get as much out of the appointment as you had hoped. It’s lovely to see that you’ve got a plan in place to start treatment again, it must be so scary but well done 👍

Wishing you so much luck xxx

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Thank you Amanda. How are you doing at the moment? xx

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I’m keeping ok thanks for asking 🙂 seems the sickness has passed now so feeling much better xxx

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Glad to hear it xx

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Im so sorry to hear that you didnt get any answers today, thats very disappointing!

It's good to hear you have been offered support for your next round! I hope ur scratch goes well, im sure the 2nd go was an unlucky fluke given your 1st one went ok! I hope this round is "the one"! ll keep checking for your updates ❤ xx

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Ooh I hope so! Not looking forward to the scratch one little bit tomorrow. Lol. On the plus side the OH is going to wait on me hand and foot tomorrow night 😊 xx

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Well that's always a plus...u should get a little bell lol 💕

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So sorry about the losses - and sorry you don’t have clearer answers. Good on one hand that everything has flagged up normal frustrating on the other hand you do not know the cause.

Most of the time with early pregnancy loss they don’t know the cause.

I lost a baby last year and it’s awful accepting the loss when the cause is unknown. I think my endo had a part to play...

Can they give you additional medication- my fertility dr issued progesterone pessaries and low dose steroid ( raised nk) during a pregnancy - I’m not doing fertility treatment just trying ( right now It is on hold until I’ve undergone surgery). With your history Could the clinic not offer low dose steroid during cycle as a safety precaution ?

Can the clinic not offer sedation with your scratch as you had a bad experience last time? It should be up to you if you require sedation. I know I couldn’t do it without anaesthetic! I don’t know how you ladies do it hats off to you!

All the best with your ivf cycle hope it brings you your much wanted baby 😍 xoxo

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Hi Jess. I was on additional medication with the baby we lost in September. As well as the pessaries I was also on daily Lubion injections. This time though, because I’ve had chilblains in the past (but never mentioned it before) they might give me clexane too... I’ll mention steroids..

As for the scratch, worse case scenario tomorrow is that if it hurts like a mother f..k.r again, well, I know I’ll survive it because I did last time. But, hopefully in the morning I’ll be collecting a prescription from my gp for some Valium, just in case xx

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I think you are very brave. I’m pretty wimpy when comes to that kind of thing! I hope it isn’t too painful this time. 😘

Have they suggested additional vitamins to take? I know some ladies have lower vitamin D - did thd mc run that test? Sorry if I’m speaking out of tone.

Al the best with the cycle- hope this is your time 😍🌈 xoxo

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No suggestions but I’ve been taking an additional vitamin d supplement anyway. Thanks Jess xx

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Tugsgirl I had a thought- did you have a hysteroscopy to look into your uterus- sometimes they offer this to ladies who’ve suffered early losses. Sometimes they might find structural issues which can cause miscarriage and sometimes they find nothing. They don’t akways know what causes early pregnancy loss 😭💔

Good luck with the scratch I hope it isn’t painful xoxo

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Thanks again Jess. I had a hysteroscopy in 2013 after an abnormal smear. Everything was fine (except for having severe dyskariosis of my cervix of course). It’s a very frustrating situation isn’t it? xx

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Well no prescription for me, gp surgery messed up and now I can’t get it in time! 🤬 Looks like I’ll have to dig deep and try to find some courage to do it again without any help xx

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That's good that you have had hysteroscopy- at least you know there is nothing structural getting in the way.

Yes it is very frustrating- I'm booked to have surgery and looks like my endo has returned since the miscarriage 😣 I need to get this all fixed before I start trying again- I don't want to risk another miscarriage.

I don't blame you having those MC tests- you need reassurance and to know you've done all you can.

It's sad that they don't know about causes of early losses- I find it offensive when people refer to my miscarriage as " bad luck" and next time will be OK 😣

I'm sorry your GP surgery have mucked up your prescription that's not OK- I'd be tempted to say something. Perhaps the clinic can give you something to help xoxo

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GP rang and I got my prescription in by the skin of my teeth. I’ve taken two Diazepam and I’m currently waiting for them to kick in 🤞 xx

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Oh that's brilliant what a relief! Hope it goes well 😘 xoxo

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I’m so sorry you did not find a more definitive answer. It must be very difficult for you. You are very courageous moving ahead with round 4. I fully relate to your comment about putting your life on hold. I really feel this way a lot of the time. Hoping your scratch is straight forward tomorrow and wishing you all the luck in the world as you embark on this FET 😘xx

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I don’t feel courageous at all. I’m terrified of a bfn and just as terrified of a bfp after the last two times. But thank you so much for your well wishes xx

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What a shame that you couldn’t get answers. But at least now you know that there are none to have and that you will be well looked after with your next FET. Hopefully all the extra care will pick up issues quickly and then it’ll all go smoothly.

Good luck with the scratch tomorrow, I can’t believe how fast they are able to arrange these appointments now.

Sending positive thoughts xx

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Thank you. My clinic has always been really good at booking appointments. I rang them to book the scratch and told them I could wait until next cycle but it just so happened that they could fit me in. I guess before I know it I’ll be in the tww again! xx

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Yeah there is no point in delaying it really. Sometimes it’s good to just go with these things, it’ll give you less time to worry and panic. I hope it all goes well 🤞 x

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You’re right. Thank you xx

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Sorry you didn’t get any answers but positive to see you have found the strength to start again. Really hoping this is your one as you have been through so much. Best of luck and please know we are all here for you xxx

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Thank you Button. You must be pretty far along now.. are you getting excited? xx

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Very excited and a little nervous lol.37 weeks today 😬❤️

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It's so frustrating when they don't find any real explanation, particularly after you are put through so many tests. Has your partner had his sperm checked? the NHS seems loathe to offer testing which I find strange when it contributes 50%

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He’s had two SA’s done outside of the clinic which showed mild Asthenozoospermia. This means that his progressive motility is below average at 4% below what is considered standard. But other than that nothing has ever flagged up and indeed his samples he gave at the clinic were good enough for ivf as opposed to icsi, which was the original idea. Yes it’s very frustrating xx

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Wanted to wish you luck for tomorrow and hope it’s not too painful. All being well my FET will be during February too...🤞 for both of us xx

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Yes good luck to you too xx

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I’m sorry they weren’t able to give you answers but I hope they have given you hope, as they have things they can do for you when you get pregnant again.

My friend’s daughter was her fourth pregnancy and she has never found out why she had three miscarriages before but she now has two children. It can still happen xx

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Thank you for giving me hope xx

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Hope all goes well for you tomorrow 💕 xx

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All d best gurl 🙏

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I’ll be keeping everything crossed that every step goes smoothly and positively for you both xx

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hey hun sorry the appointment didn't give you the answers you had hoped for. guess what tho?? we cycle buddies again..that must be a good sign...I had the scratch on Wednesday. .hope scratch goes ok xx

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How did yours go? This is your 4th round approaching isn’t it? Mine too... everything has come full circle for us lol xx

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It's our 5th..three fresh and one fet so far..all bfn. My last transfer was complicated so she had a good root around and all seemed well so putting it down to bad luck..she had to scratch twice for some reason..I hate the scratch..bloody painful..yours go ok? Xx

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It’s this afternoon for me, 3:30. And I’ve just been to collect my prescription which hasn’t even been done! It’s looking doubtful I’ll have it in time now before we set out. So if my scratch is as painful as the last one then god help me. I’m not a happy bunny. The clinic has billed us for today already (standard practice) and the scratch has gone up from £215 to £350!!! 🤬 I’m almost in tears with it all already xx

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deep breathes..you got this..you are one tough cookie xx

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I got my prescription in the nick of time! Just taken two and hopefully it’ll kick in soon and I’ll feel less fretful. As for anything else it’s all beyond my control. That’s the thing about this journey isn’t it? So much of it is out of our hands, there’s only so much we can do xx

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Biting that bullet lady! Fingers crossed for this time xx

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It’s done and I’m home. There were complications again so very painful and I was in there over an hour but apart from cramping tonight and being extremely tired, I’m ok 🙂 xx

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You get rested up and tucked in to bed. Sounds like you went through a right ordeal! Big hugs x

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I did get rather teary but no feinting or being sick this time 😂 It can only happen to me lol 😂 xx

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Ah u poor thing, well done for gtn through it 💕 rest up and take care xxx

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I will do 😊 xx

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Hi Vicky, I don't come on here much now but when I do, I always look out for ur posts. Hope so much this next round is the one...u deserve it so much!! Xxx

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Aww thanks. Pleeeaassee no more endo scratches lol 🙏🏻😂 xx

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Yes definitely! Did u have it today?! If so hope it went well xx

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Yes this afternoon. It was a bit complicated which is just typical for me. Can laugh now but it made me cry at the time lol xx

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Ouch! Just think...could be your last time!!! Xx

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I hope so 🙏🏻 Third scratch lucky 🤞 xx

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Tears are understandable. You get chocolate for being brave, right?! x

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I got pizza 🍕 Maybe I’ll have the chocolate tomorrow 😋 xx

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