Working after BFN

[ZoeLauren90]

Hi everyone,

How did everyone cope with work after a BFN? I’m currently off sick at the moment I work in a very stressful and pressured job in the NHS and I don’t not think I am ready to return next week I just can’t face it

[notifbutwhen]

Hi ZoeLauren,

I didn't cope very well with being at work but now I look back at it, it did help to distract me a bit.

I am lucky my work have been great I went in the day after my BFN but throughout the couple of weeks that followed they sent me home quite a bit.

It was difficult because I looked so unwell from the crying, coming down off the med's and also the obvious devastation was so hard.

Its down to each induvial when you feel ready to go back and it does sound like you have a stressful job where as I don't. It has taken me 7 months to start again, I am now taking meds for my 2nd FET.

Time was a great healer for me but I can and I am sure everyone else can feel your pain too. xxx

[ZoeLauren90 in reply to notifbutwhen]

Thank you for reply I got really stressed out even before I started this journey x

[ZoeLauren90 in reply to notifbutwhen]

By the way what meds are you taking for your FET? X

[Birdwithnoname]

Sorry for your BFN , sending you 💞

it’s tough isn’t it. Especially when you choose to do the morning wee test. I’m doing mine tomorrow morning and already dreading going in to work 😨

Luckily I have counselling scheduled and it’s fallen that it’s tomorrow mid morning so at least I know I’ve only got to hold on a few hours.

I think you are right to take some time off work, you have to be kind to yourself xxx

[Lou7744]

Hi there, I’m sorry to hear of your BFN. My first time round, I booked the day off as didn’t know how I’d feel. It was a positive (miscarried later on though) and for my FET, I didn’t book the day off, but tested a little earlier to soften the blow if it was negative.

Sadly it was a negative and I felt absolutely gutted, but in hindsight work kept me occupied. I work in the NHS too. Sending you big hugs 💕 xx

[CC2018]

Have you tested on your OTD? Don't give up hope yet! Xx

[ZoeLauren90 in reply to CC2018]

No I haven’t x

[CC2018 in reply to ZoeLauren90]

Wait until test day with first morning urine, it takes a few days for hcg levels to build up to a detectable level. I have found first response tests rubbish and for our ivf cycle I made myself wait until otd to ensure I got the most reliable result . Don't torture yourself with early testing- it ain't over until you know you have a reliable result. Have hope xx

[ZoeLauren90 in reply to CC2018]

I got first response because I thought they were the best ones! X

[CC2018 in reply to ZoeLauren90]

On my otd I used 3 different tests- a cb digital, the one the clinic gave me and a 1st response one- all gave a positive reading but the 1st response one took longer. You must make sure it's 1st morning urine as that is the most concentrated. If you do it later on it will be too dilute from your fluid in take xx

[Birdwithnoname]

And if finally it is still as you thought it was, treat yourself to something, like go to the hairdressers, have a glass of wine, chocolates or whatever you have been denying yourself of xx

[Steph254]

Hi ZoeLauren90, just here to say don’t completely give up yet .. you have tested quite early and things might be different by test day so try and hold on to that... channeling positive thoughts your way ❤️

[Mifkipi]

Hi Zoe, don't give up yet but I'd say mentally prepare for it. Bfn hit me pretty hard (literally yesterday). I had a positive test on 8dp5dt so having a negative afterwards was tough. I work in banking so very pressurised. I even think in my next go maybe I'd need to take the 2 weeks off. My colleagues are absolute a/h (sorry for the rant!). However having said that I think work is distracting me which is good. I told my manager that I had a MC without going into much detail and he is trying to be accommodating. Maybe you could try that?

[DisneyJL]

Only you know if you’re ready to go back to work - don’t base your decision on others (e.g. employers & colleagues). You need to look after number one. xx

[Missy_22]

It is very difficult. Everyone is different, I normally have a week or two off then go back to work. Very hard as I work with new born babies!!!

Take care and look after yourself xxxx

[CC2018]

Hey- thinking of you today. Hope you got the result you wanted xx

[ZoeLauren90 in reply to CC2018]

It was a BFN! X

[CC2018 in reply to ZoeLauren90]

Oh i' m so sorry! Take some time to look after yourself and enjoy things you gave up. Fingers crossed you get a bfp when you have your fet xx

[ZoeLauren90 in reply to CC2018]

Having my FET end of September x

[LadyMM]

Hi Zoe

I work in NHs as a nurse with long hours

I had a BFP and I got miscarriage at 4 weeks and I went for a week sick leave , however I called RSCN for advise about ivf and I discovered a major thing which is as long you carry embryos you are considered pregnant, check the website if you are a member

My manager was understanding and I had to cut my hours for my peace of mind

Try not to focus on your bfn and hope for a healthy pregnancy there is always hope