Hi all, I had my frozen embryo transfer yesterday with mixed results...On the plus side, it went ahead- I've had a transfer cancelled before because they couldn't access my uterus, so this is good! But on the negative, they couldn't use the standard process of going via the cervix and had to use something callled a transmyometrial method (or something like that!) where they go via the wall of the uterus. Also, we had two frozen embryos left and one didn't thaw properly. The one that was transferred was from the cancelled transfer and so has been thawed, refrozen and thawed. I know I should be feeling grateful it happened but all the anomalies are making me feel really apprehensive and upset about it all. I'm just sure it's not going to work and the thought of another fresh cycle is freaking me out. So cross with my body and so fed up of drugs. I think the anaesthetic for the sedation also messes with my head and leaves me really weepy (because of my dodgy cervix I have to go under for transfers). Plus I've got cramps and a bit of bleeding, which rationally I'm sure is just because of the procedure but emotionally freaks me out and makes me all doom and gloom and assume it's already screwed up.
Thank you for listening! I already feel better just writing that down.
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MissyR
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That does sound like such an ordeal to go through when for everyone else it's one of the most straightforward procedures of them all. It's not surprising that you're still sore and recovering.
I know it's hard to feel positive. We had an up and down cycle this time with lots of disappointment along the way and when I went in for transfer on day2, I was told off by the embryologist for already presuming it was going to fail. It was a protection mechanism as much as anything, I just couldn't dare to get my hopes up when nothing seemed to have gone to plan. Feelings do change though and I'm sure they will for you. You just want to give that embryo every possible chance. You've got an embryo safely inside and it sounds like a real fighter. Look after yourself and allow yourself to hope....it just might be the one xxx
Good luck! My consultant said refreezing doesn't harm the embryo at all. Try to stay positive now and put the difficult procedure behind you. You could try some mindfulness to get into a better headspace? The mindful ivf app is really good xx
Thanks fredaflinstone! Good to know what your consultant said and I will download the app tonight and give it a go. I'm game for anything that might help. Thank you for the suggestion - will let you know how I get on! Xx
Thank you so much Lamorna80. Everything you say is right and I'm actually feeling a lot better this evening. I started the day badly and then went for a walk to clear my head, managed to do a bit of work this afternoon which took my mind off things and then getting these really supportive messages. As you say, it's a protection mechanism and you don't dare to allow yourself to hope...but then somehow, time and time again, you pick yourself back up. I'm sorry you've had a rough ride too. I've just read your posts about your egg collection and it sounds like a roller coaster. I'm glad you're through it with two embryos successfully transferred. Hope you're coping in the two week wait and I'll be keeping my fingers crosSed for you. Thanks for the wise words xxxx
Thank you. The support on here is great, we really want each other to do well and get that bfp. I'll be following your journey....whilst making sure I'm keeping my feet warm 😂 I really will take on board any advice! X
You've had a huge ordeal and being weepy is normal. I also have to have sedation for ET and it feels especially unfair to have an awkward uterus/cervix on top of everything else. And I agree that the drugs have an impact. If you're on progesterone, that will also be making you weepy. Be kind to yourself over the next couple of weeks and I do hope you get your bfp x
Thank you- it means a lot. You're the first person I've 'met' that also has to have ET under sedation! I'm feeling much calmer after my rant on here earlier and going to work hard at putting it all behind me on and, as you say, being kind to myself. Xx
I know, there's not many of us! I also requested the medical director to do my ET both times, felt like I was such a pain in the ass to the clinic, especially when the embryologist tried to book me in for normal et as she didn't realise and I had to make several phone calls to try to get it sorted out. But we can't help it! I'll be at a different clinic for my next round and I think I'm going to let them do a trial et (with gas and air) to see whether the dilation I had last year has meant I could have unsedated et if we get any embryos from our genetic screening round... it would be so much easier that way.
Ha ha, yes, I've also found you have to be more on it when arrangements are being made for ET to make sure it's fully understood you need sedation and that it's more complicated than a standard process. I've seen so many doctors and nurses along the way and as lucky as I am to have nhs funding and as much as I love the NHS, not having a single, allocated doctor makes me a little nervous. as you say, it needs to be done, we can't help it! The medical director has also done my last two transfers since the bodged one. My issue is a bit different so haven't had dilation. Was that painful? For me, it's that my uterus is migrated to the extreme right of the pelvic cavity and is really anteverted so the cervix lies flush to the womb....My weird and wonderful body! I hope you get embryos from your genetic screening round and if you're able to manage with gas and air and don't need sedation that would be great....fingers crossed for you xx
My cervix is apparently completely retroverted but also pinhole, hence dilation. During my first successful trial, the dr used a clamp (its as horrid as it sounds and the nurses in theatre didn't know what it was when she asked for it as it is so rarely used) and drew a "map" so she could find her way to my cervix again. She said it was much easier the second time after dilation hence I'm willing to try under gas and air (though I might still chicken out tbh). I think the retroversion must be less severe than yours but combined with a pinhole cervix it was too much.
Dilation had to be done under full anaesthetic but I was having other stuff done as well so no idea what hurt the most... it all hurt when I woke up! And apparently dilation doesn't last forever.
I definitely would not consider a trial et without at least gas abdd air, that much I do know!
I also struggle to use tampax successfully, do you? I've often wondered if it's related to my awkward cervix!
Yes, I do and have wondered the same! I've never really got it checked out but since all this infertility malarkey I've been thinking it must be the reason. If it's not too much information (although I have already described my insides to you in a lot of detail 😂 so it's probably too late to be worrying about too much information!!) I can't push tampons far enough up and get them to sit high up. They just slip down....
I wouldn't blame you at all if you chickened out of the gas and air option. The clamp sounds awful- you are a very brave lady indeed.
I even struggle with the vaginal ultrasound to be honest. It's ok when they're checking the endometrium but the ones where they are looking at your ovaries and pushing really hard against your cervix are really painful for me. What about you?
My doctor also said she drew herself a 'map' (makes me giggle, don't know why) of my insides when she did a hysteroscopy...So nice to chat to someone else who has dealt with all this stuff!
I found it hilarious to think of her drawing a map too... and then to discuss it seriously with another dr later... tee hee!
I have got better with the ultrasounds, the more I have the more I can cope as I know they don't last long. I always take paracetamol half an hour beforehand and explain to the nurse. I still find them painful but totally bearable, I think it's cos I know approximately how long I've got to be brave for!
I also find smear tests painful and I always thought that everyone did- I thought that when they said they were uncomfortable they were just using a euphemism but it turns out that most people really do just find them uncomfortable not painful! Who knew?!!!
I'm going to turn in but thanks for the chat- oddly talking about our atypical cervixes has cheered me up. 😀. Take care and keep me posted of how you get on xx
I was told to do it by my clinic. I can't take the credit. 30mins before to give them time to work at full power! But hopefully you won't need many more internal scans as you might be pregnant xx
I just wanted to say good luck, that's more than most people go through for transfer so not surprised you feel emotional. Fingers crossed for you. My clinic (natural ivf) also freeze all embryos at day 3 until you've done 3 rounds then thaw them all and grow them to day 5, use the best and refreeze what's left - so a thaw and refreeze really must be fine! Lots of luck and take care xxx
Wow I didn't know it was a thing to freeze at day three and regrow upon defrost, sounds like a long process before you get to et? Do they have high success rates with that method?
It's called "natural modified ivf" because I have low amh, the point is just to get one or two good quality eggs each cycle rather than blasting with high amounts of drugs. Makes my chances 16-20% rather than 10-15 with conventional ivf.xx
Wishing you the best of luck Missy. Your little embie is in the very best place now! 🏡 I always think the harder to get to the end result makes us appreciate it even more! It's a very much loved embie! 🤞🏻🍀
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