Lost in Leeds: so I spend the morning... - Fertility Network UK

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Lost in Leeds

louisear profile image
louisear
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so I spend the morning with my pregnant friend (baby 2, unplanned, said she had to learn to see it as a blessing not a curse), who showed me round her new house, nursery, baby clothes, you name it. Also heard the story of her sister, also pregnant, unexpected. I just feel totally lost and just don't know how much more I can take. I know it's not intentional malice but people just don't realise how these things upset you. It's been 2 months now since my third miscarriage. I just want to know when these emotions will stop feeling so raw 😞

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louisear
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Hey miss

Sorry you are feeling that way...

If I am brutally honest that raw feeling only subsides it doesn't go away. Been a whole year since we lost our boy and sometimes it feels like yesterday.

Over the last 29 hours I helped my sister younger sister give birth to a gorgeous girl and all I wanted was for it to be me...

Go have a good cry, scream and shout til you feel better xxx

I had a good cry.

louisear profile image
louisear in reply to

thanks Tamtam. I am so sorry for your loss too. I've cried and cried and cried some more and it's exhausting. Some days you feel so strong then others it overwhelms you and at 41 I'm facing the prospect of never becoming a mum. Thank you for your reply. I really hope you get your happy ending xx

in reply to louisear

Hey Hun

Am 42 going in 43 before I start next round it's DE. Here to what little hope I have left x

louisear profile image
louisear in reply to

good luck! There are plenty of success stories on here to keep us positive!xx

I'm so so sorry to hear your friend behaved in such a insensitive manner. I am really shocked anyone could be like that. It is a cruel heartbreaking journey. I have also just been through a miscarriage and know the pain you speak off although I was lucky enough to lose it earlier than you. I would space yourself from this "friend" for your own wellbeing. You must put you first and avoid people that make you feel like that. Its unfair I saw a chav in EPU about 14 and of course she was loudly celebrating how she had heard her babys heartbeat and how amazing it was-chav dad was so disinterested he left EPU to be on the phone rather than see his unborn child. Moments before we heard no evidence of a Pregnancy like my baby had never existed. I thought what is wrong with nature? Punishing the wrong people. My SIL smoked throughout the pregnancy and baby survived and I did everything and ours died. Its not fair Hun. Sending you lots of love and your time will come again xoxo

louisear profile image
louisear in reply to

thanks Jess. I hope you are coping as best you can. It is cruel and seems so unjust. I know my friend wasn't meaning to be insensitive, people just don't understand how delicate we are. Stay positive, stay strong and keep the faith xx

7AVA profile image
7AVA

Really sorry to hear you had to listen to all of this and I'm so sorry for your losses. I'm also 41 so know that feeling of running out of time. Wishing you luck and hope your dreams of becoming a mum come true xxx

Rainbow_86 profile image
Rainbow_86

Just want to say I am thinking of you...... be kind to yourself. People who haven't struggled don't realise how there words can break your heart in two. It's incredibly difficult to protect yourself when there are so many pregnancy announcements, and reminders everywhere. I really hope you get your happy ending xxxx

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