BFN 😒: I knew it hadn't worked In my... - Fertility Network UK

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BFN 😒

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I knew it hadn't worked In my heart that's why I was trying to do a test yesterday .

Absolutely devastated after a chemical pregnancy first go then an abandoned cycle 2nd go and now this starting to feel like it's just not meant to be....... we have 1 more go and I'm not sure I have the strength any more.

Now we have to go for blood test at clinic as they don't do pregnancy tests at all and see all there successful baby pictures they have splattered on the corridor as you go in ..... always thought it was a stupid idea it certain rubs your nose in it ..... 😒

Congratulations to all that have got BFP, I hope you all have happy and healthy pregnancys and good luck to all on 2ww or people starting this journey I hope you get your miracles we all pray for.

Xx

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49 Replies
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I'm so sorry to hear this my heart goes out to you and your partner. Take some time for yourself before you think of next steps xxx

in reply to

Thank you for your kind words, your of course right. X

emu2016 profile image
emu2016

It's the most draining time. Make sure you get your follow up appointment fast so you can take time to yourself to consider next steps. Big hugs xx

in reply to emu2016

Thank you, it certainly is a rough rideπŸ˜•..... we have a holiday booked for a week Friday in the lake district so that should give us some head clearing time xx

Take care x

in reply to

Thank you x

louisear profile image
louisear

am so sorry to read this. My heart goes out to you. You will find strength when you're ready. I know what you mean about the pictures. After my second miscarriage we were going to the clinic and there was a scan picture on the wall. That really upset me as it wasn't something we were going to see that day. Stay strong. Sending lots of love xx

in reply to louisear

When we were walking in clinic I said to my hubby can I knock all these pictures off the wall lol.

My hubby is going into redundancy discussions in may so we've decided to get all that out the way first and then think where we go from there xx

emma-jane-30 profile image
emma-jane-30

Hello lovely

I'm so sorry to see it hasn't worked this time but please don't give up.

Me and my partner had a chemical naturally 2 years ago and then our 1st cycle was terminated and then our 2nd go ended in a bfn. But I've now had our follow up appointment and I've finally got my head straight and now looking forward. We've booked a holiday to get away to take some time out for us. But one thing my doctor said to me which I never really thought of was - when people are trying naturally it takes a min of 3-6 months to conceive, in those months yes the egg may fertilise but may not stick which is exactly what is happening with us, so I know some people are lucky first time but you have to remember every cycle is like one month so when it doesn't happen 1st time or even the 2nd or 3rd please don't be hard on yourself πŸ’•

Xxx

in reply to emma-jane-30

You've been through so much your self too.

There's certainly no guarantee to this journey I think that's why it makes it so hard especially when your facing your final round.

We have a holiday planned next week it will give us some switch off time and time to reflect.

Good luck with your next round x

emma-jane-30 profile image
emma-jane-30 in reply to

its a horrible hun isnt it, i cant wait for my holiday. i hope you have a lovely time away. and sending you a big hug and take care of yourself xx

in reply to emma-jane-30

Thank you 😊 x

JaneJane1 profile image
JaneJane1

Honey!!!! I am so sorry! I feel your pain!

Hope you recover soon and get the so-desired BFP!

My thoughts are with you!

xx

in reply to JaneJane1

Thank you so much means a lot x

misswinky34 profile image
misswinky34

Sorry petal ❀xxxx

in reply to misswinky34

Thank you x

MommaBear16 profile image
MommaBear16

I'm sorry to read this Cocker. It's so unfair and such a cruel process/journey. Take some time out for yourself and enjoy being off the hamster wheel for a while. When you're ready come back for your next and hopefully last cycle. Sending love x x x

in reply to MommaBear16

Thank you, we have some time away planned in the lakes our favourite switch off place..... we will dust ourselfs down and come back fighting no doubt.

Good luck on your 2ww and hope you get a BFP x

bethany2 profile image
bethany2

You have a kind heart! I am very sorry for your BFN… this is unbelievable…

Thinking of you…

xxx

in reply to bethany2

Thank you it's a rough ride with no guarantee at at end of it ..... hopefully one day we will all get our miracles x

bethany2 profile image
bethany2 in reply to

This hope is the sole thing that was helping me for some time. I have to be honest with you, I was having a lot of dark thoughts back in the days after the surgery and this thought and my husband's support were the only things that could help me at all. I remember I felt like I was left out of this world, like I did not have any friends any dreams, I thought about my future as of a hopeless time....

but I had this hope... I was hoping for something and it helped. I am sure that you will be sooner or later holding your little miracles in your hands and smiling like the happiest person, WOMAN in the world

lots of love!!!

xx

in reply to bethany2

Your right if we don't have hope we don't have anything but it's not easy

Just seen your post on your surrogacy congratulations I bet your are over the moon 😁.

It's lovely to hear successful stories that's what gives us hope xx

bethany2 profile image
bethany2 in reply to

Lots of love hun! You deserve it!

Well, yes, I am now in Kiev (it is where my clinic is located) waiting till Thursday for the 12 weeks scan. Oh my. We still haven't met our SM but it is going to be happening in 2 days. just 2 days. I am trying not to panic or something as I feel overwhelmed. I really wish you the same, I am sure that you won't be left out from this

I am sure that in the future you'll going to post something as joyful and happy as my posting. Just wait!

Fertility vibes on you hun!

xxxxx

:*

in reply to bethany2

Thank you for a lovely message .

good luck for Thursday and look forward to your future updates xx

bethany2 profile image
bethany2 in reply to

Thank you

Good luck to you too

xxx

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

Sorry to read your sad news. Thinking of you x

in reply to Tugsgirl

Thank you.

Good luck with your 2ww hope you get a BFP xx

So sorry to hear this, I know how you feel as we have just started our 4th cycle but don't give up, have a break and rest from it all then you will get your fighting spirit back. Big hugs xxx

in reply to

Thank you, it's a rough ride certainly. We have some time away next week so we will get some head piece and no doubt come back fighting ..... it's just hard to think that our next round will be our last.

Good luck with your cycle and hope you get a BFP X

in reply to

Thanks Hun and time away will do you the world of good. This is our 4th cycle but 1st with DE xxx

in reply to

Good luck I hope they bring you your miracle xx

City74 profile image
City74

Really sorry to hear this. Take care of yourself x

in reply to City74

Thank you x

vic77 profile image
vic77

Am so sorry to read this.my heart goes out to you both..it is just all so unfair. Take time to think of your next steps ..sending huge hugs xx

in reply to vic77

Thank you , we have a holiday booked for next week so will get ourself together again then x

Kloulou83 profile image
Kloulou83

So sorry to hear this. Take care of yourself and fingers crossed for the next cycle. ❀️ Xx

in reply to Kloulou83

Thank you x

-noodles- profile image
-noodles-

i am very sorry for your loss - it is so unfair and dreadfully cruel.

wishing you & your partner strength in the days ahead - sounds like your trip to the lake district has come at a good time. take care of each other.

sending lots of love 😘

in reply to -noodles-

Thank you, life is very unfair unfortunately we should all be guaranteed our mircels after going through ivf.

Yes our holiday was well timed indeed it's our favourite place to go with our mad dogs 😊.

Good luck on your 2 ww I hope you get your BFP x

Smithha profile image
Smithha

So sorry to read this lovely, please look after yourself and take some time.

Big hugs xxxxxxxxxxx

Thank you, having a few drinks this evening probably not the best of ideas but need a bit of a blow out.

Our holiday next week will do us some good I'm sure xx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Sorry to hear that you've gotten a BFN! Its such an emotionally and physically draining process all of this and to come out of it with nothing is rubbish! Try to enjoy your time away in the Lakes and get some quality time together before you decide where you go from here.xx

Thank you, it certainly is a hard journey for all involved, clinic has given us a review appointment for 23rd so hopefully will have heads gathered by then.

We will definitely throw ourselfs into our holiday and just switch off x

CountryCat profile image
CountryCat

Very sad to hear your news 😞 I hope your break will allow you the space and time to breathe again. One step at a time. Thinking of you xxx

in reply to CountryCat

Thank you, the lakes us our favourite place to go to give us some head peace, we have our review appointment the week after πŸ˜• so hopefully we will have our heads back in gear xx

seabird85 profile image
seabird85

The emotional turmoil is a killer. Up down up down. People just don't get how hard it is. .hope, then shattered and then hope. My only way to get through it is to have fun things planned in the diary. Next month's gonna be a killer as my sister gives birth after getting pregnant right away. My husband and I have even talked of a life abroad. Good luck to you xxxx

It certainly is a killer πŸ™, me and the hubby had a good drunken chat last night and we are both hoping that clinic have another plan rather than just repeat what they did last time just to give us more hope.

Oh God that does sound like it's going to be a tough month, I've had sister in laws give birth but thankfully they don't live near us so I've been able to avoid them, so I can totally understand you talking about moving abroad.

I've also got a lady at work preganant and another lady going through ivf this month ( I don't discuss treatment with lady as she can't keep her gob shut about my treatment) .

Although I don't begrudge anyone a child it's gonna be killer if I have 2 pregnant lady's working with me πŸ™ .

Good luck and stay strong

xxx

Krikri profile image
Krikri

So sorry dear... BFN also for me this morning. :(

in reply to Krikri

Thank you and so sorry to hear about your negative this morning , it's a tough journey and we are all very strong women.

Look after yourself and your partner xx

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