Natural FET before holiday or postpone until after?

Hi all, I hope all you lovely ladies are doing OK. I haven't been on here for a while as I've been trying to ignore all things IVF since our first attempt ended in a chemical pregnancy a few months back but I am now gearing up for a natural FET of our two frosties that were collected along with the two we had transferred back then.

Although our consultant said we could go ahead with transfer with my September cycle, I decided to go with October instead as it should fall during my half term (I'm a teacher) and I just thought it would be easier and less stressful if I was off work. However, I am lucky enough to have a 2 week half term in October, which is always a great opportunity for a cheap holiday as prices are always so high during term time and, particularly now that we are paying for treatment, money is an issue. We have found a fab deal and would really like to go, particularly since it would be our first chance to get away since all this IVF craziness began.

My predicament is this: do I bring treatment forward to this month and go on the holiday in October or do I postpone until November after the holiday? Or do I just not go on holiday at all? If the FET is unsuccessful, then going away after would be a good thing I think, but that's hardly the attitude is it?! If it was successful, going on holiday in early pregnancy with risks of food poisoning etc is probably not the best idea. However, if I postpone treatment until November, while I'm sure a relaxing week away just prior can only be a good thing, I would have all the added stress of having to take time off work etc. Plus, waiting even longer just goes against all my instincts - I want to get on with it ASAP! I lknow the answer is probably to do that, but I was hoping that you ladies who all completely understand what this is like might be able to tell me what you would do.

I know it's not exactly the worst predicament to be in and I am so sorry to all of you who are dealing with much bigger stuff right now, but IVF has taken over my life for so long now, the idea of doing something that isn't ruled by it and, in fact, might even postpone it, just feels so odd. Should we just do something for the sake of fun for the first time in ages, or should treatment come first no matter what? I almost feel guilty, like we can't want it enough if we're willing to delay for a holiday!

Sorry for the rant everyone over something so trivial! Xxx

4 Replies

  • I'm a teacher as well and totally understand you wanting to do it during holiday time to make it easier. I did my first ivf which failed during my 7 week summer holiday. It took over my whole holiday and although it wasnt that bad I still feel a shadow was cast over me the whole holiday. I obviously didn'tdrink but couldn't even have a can of coke and tried to be healthy. It was hard. We're planning to go private in December but would rather not give up my whole holidays again. We've our honeymoon in October which was also postponed due to ivf.xx

  • Hey

    Am sure most of us understand your predicament. Don't let this IVF dull your life am sure before it all started you used tondo things without thinking. What am saying is there is life before Ivf and life after it success or not.

    If you have had a fail previously then you must be kind to yourself and hubby too because even though he doesn't take the meds and gets proded and poked and then everything else he actually goes through it too we sometimes forget how strong they have to be for us seeing what we go through.

    We had a successful cycle only for it to be cruelly taken from us at 18 weeks after 4 cycles all Privately funded. We are not rich by any means and put our wedding off so we could have treatment, but in the same breath we knew that life has to go on and we should always have a little fun as things change in a blink of an eye.

    There is life before IVF all started and will be after....don't let it dull your light.

    So our decision was to take time out, do our very last fresh private cycle in Jan let the body heal, emotions and mind get to a place where we are ready, relaxed and positive. So we decided a complete blow out holiday before treatment is just what we need, no ivf talk, no baby talk, just us and a lot of spending... Then come back and go again.

    This year I went to Dubai when pregnant and although that wasn't the reason or factor to our loss we worried all the time we were away so next time if successful feet will firmly stay on the ground and we holiday in and round the uk if needs must require a small break.

    Take the holiday and wait, put you first after all IVF will still be the case when you get back.

    I hope my message helped you.

    Take care and goodluck xx

  • Hi Hun

    We did a natural FET just before our holiday and resulted in a chemical pregnancy, I was soooo glad of the much needed holiday after that heartache, it was the best thing for us and we also got pregnant naturally on holiday so for us it worked out really well!

    I have heard a lot of people say that the more FET's you have the greater your chances so I would say if your last one resulted in a chemical then u have really good chances on this one.. So if you go on holiday after it and you are pregnant will you be anxious about the pregnancy and if so just want to be at home or would getting away and keeping busy be the best start for a pregnancy, plus being in a relaxed environment in early pregnancy is also good..I think being off work for the TWW can be a good thing (although tougher mentally) I guess what I am trying to say is because we can't predict the future it's hard to know what is best! I think go with your gut? What feels right, what can you imagine and feel most comfortable with? I would still go on holiday whatever happens it's mentally exhausting, even when pregnant and I think holidays are so important to keep sane and a bit more relaxed, esp as a couple. We have just done our second natural FET and I got a positive test on Wednesday so they do work!

    Good luck Hun sorry I probably haven't helped but it's hard to tell you what is best for you I think you need to decide but I hope I have given u some food for thought or something positive!!

    Good luck!

    Lou xx

  • Hi, I was in a simulate situation. Booked a holiday for 6 October and could have started FET in September but decided to wait until after our holiday.

    I miscarried the day before our summer holiday so I wanted to be able to relax and enjoy this holiday and get myself ready to do it all again when in back

    Good luck

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