Life after lap: Hi all, I am new here. I... - Endometriosis UK

Endometriosis UK

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Life after lap


Hi all,

I am new here.

I had my lap last Wednesday and it has knocked me for six.

I was so focused on finding out what was going on and getting a diagnosis after years and years of being fobbed off that I didn't give a second thought to what comes after that and now I am totally lost. I was really ill when I woke up so missed out on the chance to talk to the consultant. He was there and said he had found endometriosis and scar tissue then I started throwing up not very long after so that conversation was cut short. I have a follow up appointment for 18th July so I will find out more then but I am just finding the diagnosis hard to come to terms with.

I know it is not helpful to think this way but I can't help but ask why me? I used to be such an active and busy person who thrived on my work. I feel like a shadow of my former self. I don't want to have to depend on the kindness of others for the rest of my life. How will I be able to cope with teaching from now on? What if I can never have children? I miss being independent and hate how much my life has changed as a result of this illness. Of course I have been thinking these things for some time but before the lap it didn't seem 'real' and I shook them off because I didn't know for sure that I had endometriosis. Now I do and I am losing the hope that I might feel better one day.

Can anyone relate? How did you all come to terms with your diagnosis?

Thanks for your help,


2 Replies

Hi firstly welcome this is such a good page to express how your feeling and basically get any advice or just have a rant we are all in the same boat! It's nice to just talk to people that are going through the same thing.

In terms of coping with endo and coming to terms with it all I can say the best thing to do is accept it. That's the main step into getting on with and working around it. I have been dealing with it for about 10 years now and it has become a huge part of my life. All my family and friends know that I can't plan anything around the start of my periods, and last minute I might have to cancel just because I'm not feeling well. I don't work because I'm not a reliable employee, i don't know when my symptoms flare up one day I'm fine the next I'm not. I went to university got a degree and I can't even use that to get a job. All of these things you kind of accept and move on with it.

And most importantly I think being told you might not have children is the hardest thing especially for me as I have always wanted a big family with loads of kids but again you assess the situation and you do your research and there are so many other routes you can go down to have children it doesn't have to be just a natural birth.

Only you can come terms with it and yes it will be hard explaining to the people around you that this is your life now but you don't have to let endo define you, it not who you are it's just a part of your life that unfortunately is there and the quicker you accept it and think 'right I can beat this' the sooner you can get back on track and live your life.

I hope that helps and gives you reassurance!! Good luck with everything x

Hi Amnc, I've recently been diagnosed and am currently awaiting specialist input and treatment options.

I think I'm going through similar thoughts at the mo - asking why me and what did I do... Hoping that one day the pain will be manageable and I'll start feeling like me again. Good luck!

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