Hi all, hope everyone is doing as well as can be hoped. I recently had my annual checkup and a few things showed up that were not normal. They detected trace of blood in my urine, high TSH, elevated levels of alkaline phosphatase and "unsatisfactory" pap results. Now being the lunatic I am, I am completely freaking myself out. And of course, I had to google my results (obviously) and find out all the worst-case scenarios to entertain myself with. They asked me to repeat the urine test immediately and the remaining tests after 3 months. But I cannot do the urine test right now because I have recently started a new bcp and I have been spotting off and on since then (which is a common side effect according to my gyno). I can only do the test once the spotting stops, and I have no idea when that'll be. So the long and short is that I am a complete mess now.
The rational part of my brain knows that all of these could have relatively harmless causes. I know that unsatisfactory pap could simply mean that the sample was not good enough. But being rational has never been my strong point. To add to it all, I have had very bad news about my cousin who is suffering from cancer. I am very close to him, he is almost like a brother to me. So all in all I am in a very bad place and imagining all kinds of things and driving myself crazy. I cannot discuss my fears with my family because everybody is quite stressed out as it is and I don't want to be selfish by trying to draw attention to me.
Just to give a bit of history - I have endometriosis and severe pain 3 weeks a month. I have already undergone laporoscopies, cyst aspirations, have been on Lupron, two failed IVF cycles and a zillion other things. I worry that all this messing around with my body has rendered something wrong inside. Please can somebody help calm me down a bit and give me some perspective before I start digging my own grave in my backyard? I hate feeling like this