So the last few weeks have been a bit mad but i have been keeping an eye on everyone's progress and passing comment occasionally. The week before last was half term here so even though I am training for a 10k I did what I always do, take the week off and let my over exercised body have a well deserved rest and the best bit of course spend the week messing about with our daughter :). I have been pushing sooo very hard since Xmas, I knew that I needed a break as running was becoming a chore and much less fun than it used to be. Ideally we would have had a few more weeks in our training plan and have gone a bit more gently but I decided to have a go despite having no left margin for rest or injury.
It as a wonderful week culminating in my lovely sisters 50th fancy dress birthday party (I was a cave woman and OH a Mexican) the day before the party Josephine (daughter) and I spent 11 hours baking.....42 eggs later there was cake batter, butter cream and ganache up the walls and all over us but we had made a mahussive 50 cake in number shaped tins we had managed to hire. It took us an hour just to figure out line them! Anyway I did a lemon drizzle 5 and Josie did two layers of Victoria sponge for the 0. The cakes were so big I had to roll the icing for each on the glass dining table! We also made a million cupcakes of all different sizes in various flavours, Guinness and chocolate with baileys ganache, coconut and lime to name but a few......you get the picture, a house FULL of cake lol, my poor OH came in with a beautiful bunch of valentines day roses and all he got in return was the cake bowl to lick. Anyway sorry to rattle on but the party was wonderful and and my sister cried over the cakes (nearly as much as Josie and I had lol) .
We got back on the Sunday and flaked out. Monday I was back doing body pump but Tuesday I felt afraid to run. I had my gear on, had to do driving loops from Penarth to Newport dropping off OH car for MOT then himself to work but that was fine so I didn't understand why when I got back I could not bring myself to run, other than i normally go straight after the school run. Lots of Demonic chatter etc. so for the first time I missed a scheduled run.
Wednesday feeling awful and really lacking confidence. Convinced I could not run for a bus if I got paid. I was also deeply suppressing terror at the thought of the impending 10k race.
Thursday and Friday came and went and the feelings were getting even stronger. I had started to think that the 10k was off for me and I might never run again......sitting here typing that makes me chuckle because it's ridiculous but that's how I felt. Plus OH and I managed to fabulously avoid the subject of training and the physical act of doing any for quite a few days lol.
Then yesterday we were chatting and it came up. Just talking about what was going on made us both feel better. I felt scared about my asthma as my last outside run was awful breathing wise and realised that I had wanted to get as much outdoor work in as possible to see how my lungs were. not doing that had really knocked my confidence. Following our chat we decided to run today and then following that we would decide wether to back out or not. The thought of that made us both wince so we decided to go for it even if we had to walk, anything is better than giving in.
It was soooo cold this morning, we live in a marina which opens out across the barrage to the sea so the wind was at us the whole way. I decided to start out slower than usual and see how I managed. I certainly did not want to trigger an asthma attack and I wanted that 10k too 
if I was on schedule, today would have been my first 10k if not before, ready for a lighter week leading up to the run.
Well! It was fantastic, OH is much faster than me (he does way a good four and a half stone less though) but bless him he slowed right down so that we could do it together. We had a fabulous run, slowing down meant I had no problems breathing, we chatted most of the way and had a good laugh. The last 1k went slowly as we'were back home so kind of ran around the block a lot lol in order to finish. I mean yeah my back and hips were tight but we felt great! Quick shower then off out, got back, cleaned to house and have not long sat down. I can't believe it, am still shocked but so very happy. Note to self.......NEVER GIVE UP.......there is always a way around things, be flexible and change the goals if necessary.....and don't go too flipping fast Jems. I usually run about 7.5 to 8k/hr but today averaged at 7 but it was enough to fall into a natural comfortable pace. I would rather still be going on Sunday 3 hours after they have all gone home but with a smile on my face, having enjoyed the run rather than going all out and half killing myself. I get that people who have been running for a long time have times to beat and that is wonderful....for them, not me. I am 10k away from that sofa and happy again so that is all that matters so me.
To anyone reading this who is afraid of running outside because everyone says it's harder, take it easy and find your own pace......pleasure will soon follow. I don't like much t.v at the best of times so the distraction of fresh air and nature rocks for me. Having said that I would not have got this far without the treadmill so it definitely has it's place and it's great for intervals but I found the long slow runs torture.
Off to body pump tomorrow and being very gentle with myself for the rest of the week. No matter what happens on Sunday, I have done it so I can dance around the course and take 6 hours if I like it does not matter 
Oh and the time was 1hr 20 (I did speed up a few times)
Jems x
I did it! OMG I did it!!
I did it!!!
I Did It, I did it, AGAIN :)
I DID IT!!
W5r3 🐌🐌🐌⛹🏻♀️⛹🏻♀️OMG I did it !!! 🎉🎉🎉
