As I promised to lusmo (thank you), I did go out today for a 10 minute jog.
I went with my dog, as I knew otherwise after walking her I will not go anywhere. So I pushed myself very hard to put on running gear on me (this is always the hardest part) and we head out. I decided to try 'naked' run, so no headphones, no music, no guided or motivational talks, just me my dog and canal path. My doggy was a black fury, she was running like crazy forth and back - I think she had energy for us both
I wasn't tracking time or distance. I just jog until I decided it's time to turn around and job back. When I wanted to finish I saw 19 minutes, so I jogged for 1 more minute finishing with 2.7km in 20 min. I finished just in time, as it started to be really dark. But I was prepared, and just in case, I had a head torch in my pocket.
Slow jog. No pressure. I think behind me I've noticed the shadow of my running mojo. The run wasn't joyful or pleasurable, but it wasn't unpleasant. Putting running clothes, pushing myself out of the door, and convincing myself to actually start jogging was the hardest part - a lot of self talk, with promise in the back of my head, remembering all your kind and motivational words, reminding myself all of your inspirational posts... But then it just kind of go smooth.
I finished the run with some booty exercises for runners with small bands, core strengthening using Nike Training app and finishing planks, and a proper session of stretching. I didn't go for hot shower, I decided to give myself a bit of pleasure and took a long, very warm bubble bath
Maybe, just maybe, I am back on track with running. I think I will do at least one more run without any goal of time or distance, but I haven't decided yet.