I did not want to go for a run today. Why am I doing this? It's raining today, and the weather's going to deteriorate, so if I go today, then i'll have to do W5R3 on Friday when the weather will be even worse. It's boring running round the same housing estate but the nicer runs have busy roads to cross - you can wait for 90 seconds at traffic lights if the timings wrong. I joined a beginners running club for company - but it was cancelled the past two weeks and next week there are tube strikes planned, so it'll probably either be cancelled again or I won't be able to get there. Welcome to my Wednesday self-pity party.
But W5R2 was in my diary. Today. Why did I have to write the whole 9 weeks in my diary? Why?
At times like this I try and focus on those who would love to be in my shoes, but through no fault of their own and having been dealt one of life's horrible curveballs will never have the chance. Ever. Whilst I got changed, I thought about how lucky I was. The gremlins went silent, and off I went.
I miscalculated the 5 minute walk between the 8 minute runs - I had it in my mind it was 3 - and faced the second 8 minutes all uphill. When Laura cheerfully announced I had only done 4 minutes, a little voice whispered that at the top of the first hill I could turn left and continue on flat ground, rather than crossing over the road to continue up the next hill as planned. So I did. The voice lied - it was still uphill - but only just. I waited so long for Laura to tell me that the 8 minutes was up that I felt sure she would give a little laugh and tell me actually it had been 10 minutes. Or maybe 12. But no, it was just 8 minutes.
I feel this week I'm out there because I have to, not because I want to and I'm unable to see beyond the next run. It's an odd feeling, because as a returning runner, I know it's possible since I've done it before without a second thought.
So, although the run was a success, it didn't feel like the victory I thought it would. I guess the gremlins are still hanging around.
I need to plan a better route for Friday.
Written by
SlowSlowKwikKwikSlow
Graduate
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There is an element of sometimes having to go through the motions and complete the runs we don't enjoy, in order to be(come) fit enough to run the ones we do enjoy. And with that said, I'd better get out there lest I miss today's run.
I love your reasoning about being lucky. That's powerful!
Well done. Great post and I'm glad that you reminded me that I am lucky. It's true that there are many for health and various reasons cannot run or do exercise.
Despite everything you still say the run was a success. I think everyone deserves a medal for even getting out the door and doing any running in this weather. I still get my doubts and as they're known as gremlins before I set out and in first few minutes but they quickly disappear.
I feel doubly smug with myself when a run goes OK never mind great when if at first I think it could be a failure !
I'm happy with Family and stuff but the running has given me satisfaction and sense of achievement that perhaps we don't get at work and other stuff. It's definitely made me mentally and physically sharper and even started studying again. My original motivation was only to get fit and healthy ! Which I have done.
There's absolutely nothing at all wrong with choosing a route which avoids hills. Or changing route mid-run. If that's what's needed to make the run possible, then in fact it's A Very Good Thing. So there!
Even when your mind is reluctant and the gremlins are out in force, you're stronger than them - you proved that today (and yes, I know exactly what you mean about hoping Laura will admit to tricking us!). You've got this. Today - this week, even - is a blip. Keep going and you'll find your mojo again
I didn't really love the running right the way through the programme to be honest. I guess it was partly because I always felt like I was a beginner/not really a runner. After I graduated I felt much better about it all. There are still days when I really don't feel it but I make myself get out there as it's so easy to just stay in bed and then I'd probably do the same the next day...and the next etc.
You're right Slow, we are really lucky! We whinge, and moan, and doubt ourselves, and are amazed and overjoyed, and all of the other emotions that go with doing the C25K,and no some folks will never get the chance to experience it. So let's give it our best shot because it is a crying shame not too...xx
Great post and I know how frustrating it can be running the same route, so well done for trying out a new route. We are lucky to be able to run, and I certainly think this often, when I think of how I was feeling 12 months ago, and 2 years ago when I had to learn how to balance and be able to walk without holding on to the walls.
But that doesn't always make it easier, so well done you for getting out there and finishing the run even though you weren't feeling positive about it. You should feel proud.
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Week 8 Gremlins
Laura-Pod+, Confusion but I eventually beat those gremlins!
Gremlins
THE GREMLINS IN MY HEAD TONIGHT!
