Scared to run alone...: Hi everyone, I'm new to... - Couch to 5K

Couch to 5K

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Scared to run alone...

17 Replies

Hi everyone,

I'm new to the community and new(ish) to C25K. I started a few months ago but have never made it through week 2. The reasons being illness (just a cold) and most recently my husband injured himself and has been unable to run with me.

Now my friend and I have signed up to do a Race for Life Pretty Muddy 5K in September, the training for which is very similar to C25K. So it's time to get myself back out there!! The problem is, I'm scared to run alone, I'm not sure why... I think maybe at 16st I just feel like I'm going to look stupid struggling away on my own. Has anyone else felt like this? How do you get over it?!

Help?!

Debs

17 Replies
IannodaTruffe profile image
IannodaTruffeMentor

Many people feel self conscious, but you will soon discover that runners, despite the dayglo garb, are invisible. Nobody will pay any attention to you.

So, you can't use that as an excuse now. Getting out for the first run is a huge hurdle, but this empowering programme will build your self esteem and confidence along with your physical state and stamina. It is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Don't delay, ho today.

McFitty profile image
McFittyGraduate

Yes! Loads of us felt that way. I still feel that way in week 8! I know the feeling of wanting a co-conspirator but to be honest I think going it alone is better. You have no one to impress but yourself so no pressure. There are loads of ways past this too. Go somewhere nobody knows you, run early in the morning or late at night, in your garden, in your living room! Just start! You will be so amazed at what your body is capable of. I have been constantly amazed. The hardest bit is starting. Good luck, you CAN do this :) Also, someone else posted that wearing dark glasses helps (a bit like blinkers on a horse) makes you feel a little less vulnerable.

HappyRunner profile image
HappyRunnerGraduate

I felt really self conscious too the first few times. I tried to run close to home and just wear loose and comfortable clothing. However you quickly forget about it when you start running!! Over time I have had many walkers who will say 'well done you for running'. So I wouldn't worry about what anyone else thinks and just get out there.

Thanks everyone! Glad to know I'm not the only one, I know that I just have to do it and once I have it won't be so bad. I'll be doing my first run tonight so I'll let you all know how I got on :)

Oldfloss profile image
OldflossAdministratorGraduate

You get over it..because you can...yes you can! :)

Many folk on here have felt exactly like you for so many different reasons. Weight, age, uncertainty.. so many reasons. You have taken that first huge step, you want to do this :)

Now... follow the programme and go really, really slowly. Travel this journey at your pace and in your own way.. take extra rest days if you feel you need them too. People on here, will support and encourage you all the way.

Start now, as you mean to go on... and remember this lovely quote...:)

"When someone tells you, that you can't do it...you just turn around and say, Watch Me ! "

AndyIoW profile image
AndyIoWGraduate

Hidden who cares what people think!

Luckily I run very early in the morning so do not meet many people out and about, those I do usually just give a 'morning' or a nod of the head acknowledging my presence (all be it puffing and sweaty). In a few months time I will swap to running in the evenings so will be around people more on their way to dinners/pubs etc.

I am even heavier than you and I have given up caring what people think of me on the outside, its whats inside that counts. People may look at you differently, but most in their mind will be thinking such things as 'If she/he can do it I can as well' or similar.

Determination to do things for ourselves are what sets us apart. I have graduated and apart from inches being lost, my weight has stayed the same (at the moment) but I know and feel healthier. I can walk up some hills that I puffed at the top but now do it without even worrying about it.

I use the runs I do as a way of switching off the brain and just listen to the body and clear the negative thoughts out. Weight will change in time, besides its better to lose it slowly than quickly and put it all back on.

Bazza1234 profile image
Bazza1234Graduate

Remember Sammie Davis Junior?? He liked to play golf. One day somebody asked him what his golf handicap was. He replied - " I am a short black one eyed Jew - and you want me to have a handicap at golf too??"

We all have our handicaps - me, I am old short bald and wear glasses - but I can still run!! :) So can you!!!!

Pilgrimrunner profile image
Pilgrimrunner

Hi, I am on week 4 run 3. But I've done some double weeks.

I used to worry about the same things too.

I get the looks too.

My advice is 'Rock it' head up, music pumping, give em a show. Ha!

I listen to fast feel good music.

I used to run in baggy clothes, I'm not in great shape, but now I'm all running gear.

The problem is, this world will suck you down if you let it, you got to respond with a firm no to that.

Xx pilgs.

Haylj17 profile image
Haylj17

Hi Debs

That is exactly how I felt , I'm also carrying a 16st frame but the way I look at is if we continue with the training we wont always be struggling and we wont always be 16st!!! :)

I also find going on my own is better as I don't feel I'm competing with anyone else and feel good about my own run instead of feeling a bit disheartened because whoever I am with can run faster and for longer.

Keep going you'll get there and honestly last night I ran past some young kids, a man walking his dog and passed a couple on bikes and no one bothered to even look back at me, so i think its me just being worried over nothing.

Good luck :)

misswobble profile image
misswobbleGraduate

You can run alone! You can! Sometimes you just have to gird your loins and crack on. That time is now. Don't build this up out of all proportion, it's just a run/walk session that's not going to be too onerous. Loads of us had to don the dreaded lycra at some point, fearing shame and ridicule, which never materialised. Folks out there in the streets and parks are generally busy with their own lives to bother about us. So come on Debs get out there. You'll be fine. You will be so chuffed to get the first session out of the way. It's always a major hurdle in our minds. You'll soon be over it though.

I am just off myself, for a leisurely amble round the streets through the park and back. Lovely day for it ☺ .....

Lizzyb11066 profile image
Lizzyb11066

Just make sure you've got the girls strapped down with a supportive/compression bra - it really does make all the difference to the running experience (from a fellow larger lady) :)

Bundoodle profile image
BundoodleGraduate

Go out and knock 'em dead! If anyone thinks negatively about you that's their problem not yours. The vast majority of people won't even register your presence and the rest will probably see someone who is taking control of their life and is determined, strong and will probably outlive them! Stick in your earbuds, smile and go. Runners Rock (even the slow ones) !!

Irish-John profile image
Irish-JohnGraduate

Wow! you are the first new runner I've come across that wants to go out the door with someone! Most of us would wish to run around Chernobyl at three am for fear of being SEEN by anyone :)

the best advice I can give you is - read as many posts here as you can so you really understand you are NOT unique and NOT alone in this quest with all the fears we have at the beginning

Then see what the results are for those who went ahead - despite our fears of humiliation and ending up feeling even more rotten about our lousy lives.

I promise you - the 'worst' things that will happen to you will NEVER happen to you because they are not real, they are in your head only. Read the posts. We can't ALL be delusional here :)

I wish I had had someone take a video of me on my W1D1 (though I would have literally had a nervous breakdown with the mortification if someone had shown it to me back then :) ) - and then had them take another of me just this morning when I ran over two times the circuit of the Park for twenty minutes straight and did it with a little bit of a reserve in my tank at the end :)

You honestly would have been horrified to see the shambling, heaving, little- kid-frightening mess I was that first day...and you would be frankly unbelieving that it is not some kind of weird con game seeing me this morning.

To paraphrase someone a tad more famous than me 'Arise from your Couch - you have nothing to lose except your old self' !

It's true. As unlikely as it sounds to you right now - I promise you, it's true.

Best wishes and I will follow your progress should you take that 'leap of faith' and join us. I hope you do :)

jo4t15 profile image
jo4t15Graduate in reply to Irish-John

What a great idea to take video. Any newbies, it would be so worth it, though you probably can't bear the thought of it ! In such a short time you could look back and see the HUGE progress you'll make. My first one minute runs made me swear I thought I was going to die. Now I probably still don't look pretty but I am able to run and run!

Irish-John profile image
Irish-JohnGraduate in reply to jo4t15

I would have been VERY interested to see the difference at one stage because it would have been kind of fun, kind of uplifting to see how much 'better' I run- but honestly at this stage the 'fun' comes from the inside and the 'uplifting' from the Forum and I really don't mind what I look like at all :)

My daughter might be doing a run with me soon and if anyone is going to be 'brutally honest' about what I appear like now it wiill be her :) And that's fine - I am having the time of my life running, and when I finish a run, and when I look forward to the excitement and challenge of the next run. Everything else is negligible when it comes to 'how' I run :)

McFitty profile image
McFittyGraduate in reply to Irish-John

John of the magic pen. I feel inspired all over again! 20 minutes, go you :)

melly4012 profile image
melly4012Graduate

SO many of us felt self conscious and worried what people would think at the beginning! I ran inside on a treadmill for the first 7 weeks and then when I first went outside it was in the dark at 10pm in black clothes so I wouldn't be visible and I was still shaking like a leaf! Now I doubt I'll ever run inside again! I promise, as the programme progresses your confidence will grow and grow, your running clothes will get brighter and your smile will get wider!

Do you know why you've struggled to get through week 2 previously? Although I've never done it as I love running alone, I wonder if running with other people might actually put pressure on? The programme is all about slowing down when you need to to make sure you finish each running section and if you're worried about matching the pace and speed of someone else it may mean you're not doing what YOU need to do to get through. Some people might be really spurred on by running with someone else but perhaps if you try it on your own it might make the difference? I promise, the only people who notice you will be either jealous that you're doing something they're not or other runners who love the fact that you're out there with them! It's easier said than done, but so many of us have been there and you can get past it too! :)

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